Fifth Third Bank. Ever heard of them? They’re no PNC or Citizens, or even Dollar Bank. They have two branches in the Burgh. The office on the corner of Grant and Seventh has a nice big two window banner. Following in the steps of pretty much every other bank, they are advertising
TOTALLY FREE CHECKING!!!*
Whoa! Not just free checking, TOTALLY free! Seems as though something that is advertised as TOTALLY free shouldn’t need an asterisk next to it right? I mean what could the fine print possibly be?
*Customer must purchase checks.
Huh? Do I misunderstand what “totally” means? Let me check.
wholly: to a complete degree or to the full or entire extent
So if I must purchase checks, that isn’t totally free checking is it? I mean it’s not like you are going to get a checking account and not need checks right? After all a checking account without checks is just an account.
Those marketing people at Fifth Third Bank really got a set of huevos on them, no?