Have you met my daughter Eighty-Six?

The next time you enter into a conversation about the insane names people give their children (I’m looking at you Apple Paltrow Martin, Rumer and Scout Willis, Khal-el Cage, Diezel and Denim Braxton, Hopper Penn and Homer Gere), be sure to include this one.

They named their son Seven after being inspired to “go numerical” after looking at an 84 Lumber sign.

Some thoughts:

1. Are you freakin’ kidding me?
2. This is a ripe money making opportunity. They need to have ANOTHER child, name it Eleven and then introduce their kids as “Seven Eleven.” I bet they could get free Slurpee’s and brain freeze for life.
3. If they get free Super Bowl tickets or some other outrageous gift from Ben Roethlisberger because they branded their son with a name that the child will NEVER live down (imagine the confusion when they cover the number seven in preschool), I am naming any future child of mine “Eighty-Six” in the hopes that Hines Ward will call me.
4. If you go here, you will see that Seven is classified as an “unusual” baby name. Right up there with the names Society and Strategy. Some people should obviously not be allowed to name their own children.


  1. Michelle
    January 27, 2006 10:58 am

    I completely agree.. I’ve just recently had a baby, and I couldn’t believe some of the names people were suggesting for me, even my father is into odd/stupid celebrity-style names. I couldn’t believe it.

  2. Julie
    January 27, 2006 11:11 am

    Wasn’t there a kid named “Seven” on Married… With Children toward the end of the series? I kind of stopped watching around that time, so I wasn’t sure where he came from, and I think he just disappeared one day.

  3. Anonymous
    January 27, 2006 12:17 pm

    I have a cousin who named her child Ky, pronounced “Chi”.

    Poor poor child. I can already visualize their middle school locker.

    Welcome back PG!


  4. Scott
    January 27, 2006 12:56 pm

    Yikes, that’s abominable! Another good website to go to if you want to check out the popularity of baby names over time is The Name Machine.

  5. Anthony
    January 27, 2006 9:08 pm

    I started to write a comment, but I went a little overboard.

  6. Sherry Pasquarello
    January 28, 2006 11:01 am

    i was wondering just where i had heard of a boy named seven before and julie got it. yes, there was a little blond kid on the show for an episode or two and then he dissappeared. seven, god!!!

  7. pittgirl
    January 30, 2006 11:30 am

    Awesome post on T & A, Anthony. I am the only American that didn’t watch Seinfeld, so of course I missed that connection. As for “favorite dime-piece shorty” … awwwww, thanks.