Dear Jerome Bettis,
I like you, I do. But I don’t feel one bit sorry for you and your lost $67,000 in jewelry, ice, and bling.
You put a $31,000 watch and a $35,000 bracelet with 270 diamonds (that I bet looks completely gay on you) in an unlocked locker (IT’S CALLED A LOCKER BECAUSE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO LOCK IT!) in Detroit and you forgot about it until a whole MONTH LATER when you say to yourself, “Bussy! Where the f#*$ is your sixty seven thousand dollars worth of bling?!”
Dude. $67,000 is more than most Burghers make in a year. We don’t want to hear about it.
Suck it up and go buy yourself some new bling. And then keep closer tabs on that shit. Between you and Duce misplacing gs and gs worth of jewelry, I’ve had about enough. At least Duce realized immediately that he was without his bling. You didn’t realize it for 30 whole days. That’s ludicrous.
Of course, that just might be the NyQuil talking.