Can I call you Buddy?
Listen Buddy, I realize you are commissioner of the MLB. Good for you. I also realize that being the commissioner of a sport doesn’t mean you know everything about the sport. Hell, they considered Condi Rice to be NFL commissioner. I can’t believe that she knows everything about football. She doesn’t even know how to do her own hair.
So please, Buddy, don’t talk to me about how we fans need to support the shittastic management of the Pittsburgh Pirates. We’ve heard it for 13 years and finally the “fans” of the Pirates are fed up and letting their voices be heard.
Yesterday when asked about why the Pirates can’t seem to win very often, you gave this shittastic sound bite. Buddy? Shittastic is the word of the day.
“I know how determined they are, and I know how desperate they are to produce a winner… We’re all held accountable by the won/loss record, but I know how committed these people are.”
Using words like “determined” and “committed” to try to make us forget the results and focus on the intentions? We’re on to you.
Buddy? I am determined, and desperate, and committed to do the following: be best friends with David Conrad, annihilate the pigeon population of the world, become richer than Bill Gates, broker peace in the Middle East, cure Bobby O of cancer, etc. etc. etc. Now Buddy, some would say that the Pirates winning a pennant is more doable than any of those things, however, after 14 years of not even having a winning record, I’m thinking … not so doable.
How can we expect different results if the Pirates keep doing things the same way?
This town could be a baseball town. Know how I know? Because of the lump that rose in my throat and lots of Burghers’ throats when the cheers rose up for Jason Bay and Freddie Sanchez during player introductions last night. We want to cheer for the Pirates. We want to be proud of them. Yesterday, we finally got a little taste of what it’s like to be proud of the Pirates. We liked it. We loved it. We want more of it.
Let that put you, Kevin, and all those Nuttings on notice that we’ve had damn enough of this shittastic management. We’ve had it up to here with all the commitment and desperation and determination. We want some freaking results.
We built that gorgeous ballpark and I say as taxpayers, we should be allowed to take it back and give it to someone else.
PS. Looking hot in the poncho dude. And by “hot” I mean “shittastic.”