Joey Porter is Mr. Rogers?

There are certain things that I would believe before I would believe Joey Porter is a married father of four children … all from the same woman … his wife … who he has known for 22 years.

I would be more likely to believe that David Conrad is secretly stalking me.

I would be more likely to believe that Sally Wiggin was once a stripper.

I would be more likely to believe that Demetrius Ivory will provide an accurate five day forecast … well maybe no to that one.

But seriously, the Trib did a sit down interview with The Mouth and boy, did I learn alot and you will too from these Joey statements:

  • I love the Rooneys.
  • People aren’t going to talk about Joey Porter the married man with four kids. They want to hear about me playing football, the attitude I have, stuff like that.  Football is the thing I do to provide for my family, but my family is my life. My bio says: married with four children. They know I’m a family man. They know I have a daughter that’s autistic.
  • I want them to look at me like Superman. If Daddy’s hurt, who are we going to lean on?
  • I’m 29 now. For 22 years of my life I’ve known her. Going to junior high with her and high school, then she came to live with me in college, I know everything I need to know. I always knew that was going to be my wife.
  • She’s been there for all my struggles. She knows everything about me. There’s just a whole other side there would be without her in my life. Any guy that tries to tell you that he don’t need a strong woman behind him, he’s not living right. He’s not understanding how life is supposed to be lived. If you take her away from me I’m stuck. It’s a much harder life for me without her in my life. My wife is going to be there for me win, lose or draw. The football stuff, trust me, is some of the best things to ever happen to me. But my family, my wife and kids, are definitely always first.
  • I’ve made some mistakes out there, I’ve done some things that were wrong and he (Cowher) definitely got on me for it, and I appreciate a man that does everything that he does for me.

My brain is working overtime to reconcile these statements with what I thought Joey “My dogs eat horses for breakfast” Porter is like as a person.

All I can figure is that Joey Porter has been taking lessons on being AWESOME from Troy Polamalu.


  1. bern1
    November 13, 2006 1:22 pm

    You’re confused? How do you think Joey Porter’s Pit Bulls feel?

  2. Awesome Comet
    November 13, 2006 1:25 pm

    God I feel salty for my last comment.

  3. pittgirl
    November 13, 2006 1:38 pm

    Yeah, you might want to start kissing Joey Porter’s ass for that one. Just so he doesn’t sic his dogs on you. ;)

  4. L
    November 13, 2006 1:44 pm

    “Any guy that tries to tell you that he don’t need a strong woman behind him, he’s not living right.”

    What a neato thing to say, and from Joey Porter (?!?!) Man. There is something in the water today.

  5. Z
    November 13, 2006 2:30 pm

    I think he’s so cool. Rock on Joey…from one parent of an autistic kid to another!

  6. bern1
    November 13, 2006 4:26 pm

    Awesome Comet: That’s some really unfortunate karma. You couldn’t have known.

  7. SteelerTribute
    November 13, 2006 8:19 pm

    Wow, that is amazing and unexpected stuff. From now on I’ll make sure to just stick to ripping Joey for disappearing on the field and not make any personal jokes (although the dog/horse thing is just SO easy).

  8. After Further Review
    November 13, 2006 8:41 pm

    Obviously none of Joey Porter’s kids ever wanted a pony for Christmas.