The Hardys might be too rich.

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Holy fat wallets, Batman!

Joe Hardy, that crazy old bastard that started 84 Lumber, turned 84 and his family threw him a birthday party.

Just some of the highlights in addition to Troy Polamalu:

1. Xtina B singing “Happy Birthday”

2. The cast of The Chorus Line singing “One”

3. Robin Freakin’ Williams

4. Bette Freakin’ Midler

5. A baby freakin’ hyena as a gift from the employees.

6. The Connellsville Airport (huh?) will be renamed the Joseph Hardy Freakin’ Regional Airport.

Can we talk about the hyena. Really!??!? A hyena? The next time you’re chatting with friends and one of those friends is discussing the arduous task of shopping for her father’s birthday and she says, “What do you buy a person who has everything?”

My God, you will answer, “A baby freakin’ hyena!!”

You may be telling yourself that PittGirl is snarking on this because she is jealous and mad she wasn’t invited. You are 1 kajillion percent correct, my friends.

What do I need to do to get invited to the next Hardy freakin’ party?


  1. mimi
    January 8, 2007 9:53 am

    I may be alone out there but this guy makes me sick. Good for him he has all this money, good for him. I know for a fact what he did to his ex and now deceased wife by cheating on her with his secretary, Debbie. Then he married Debbie dear and what do you think that tart did to him? You guessed it – she did the same to him that he did to his ex.

    You might say – oh you would act the same way if you had the money that Big Joe has. No, I can honestly say I would not.

  2. trinity
    January 8, 2007 10:17 am

    joe built his massive mansion up the street from where i used to live in the mon valley. helicopter noises at all hours & such. sucked. there’s a huge gate for it & any time my friends & i got near it we could swear we heard someone shouting “release the hounds!”

  3. honda driver
    January 8, 2007 10:54 am

    not to mention the nemacolin art collection — lots of painting on velvet, clowns with tears, dogs playing poker, and the overstated lobby with a bizillion chandeliers. yep. money doesn’t buy taste.

  4. dressagelady
    January 8, 2007 11:09 am

    Ugh. I was raised in what is slowly becoming “Hardy Country” and I completely agree with you, mimi – he’s sickening. He’s also really obnoxious. I was at an event for local tourism in which he was supposed to speak about his resort, Nemacolin. He showed up at a business professional event –late– in suspenders. Then he drawled on about his money and Hilary Duff at his kid’s birthday party that year. What a goof.

    Honestly, a baby hyena? What do you do with it? I guess it might grow up to be like a dog?

  5. Rinsem
    January 8, 2007 11:17 am

    I can’t believe what a ridiculous event this was! I mean I’m sure many people have heard of 84 lumber… but this is crazy, you would have thought that some President or Prince of a country just celebrated a birthday. Note to self – ask wife to have Christina sing happy birthday to me at my next party.

  6. the_suburbanite
    January 8, 2007 11:34 am

    Xtina sand “Beautiful” to me last night…on my daughter’s Barbie guitar.

    What an outlandish/freakish display of wealth.

    A baby flippin’ hyena from the employees? To go along w/ his lions? “Joe Bellhop, can we have your $20 donation today? We’re buying the boss that hyena for his b-day, remember?”

  7. Bob
    January 8, 2007 11:43 am

    I wish I could find the article that the PG ran a few years ago about his wedding. It was equally vulgar — but was written with much more of a sneer than this current love letter to his vulgarness. Highlight was when he paid $100,000 to fly Kenny Rogers in to sing “Through the Years” to his new tart of a wife.

    And Rinsem, don’t forget that Joe IS royalty. He purchased the British title “lord of the manor of Henley-in-Arden” in 1990 for $170,000. (Source)

    Is his restaurant, “King of the Hill” still around? I’ll never forget the sheer pleasure of eating a gigantic piece of dead cow while his life-sized portrait gazed down upon me from on high.

  8. cityworker
    January 8, 2007 11:58 am

    Wow, you are all really jealous!!! I am sure the guy did nothing to any of you personally, yet you talk with such hatred. Leave it alone people, take it for what it is. A guy with too much money having no idea how to do anything good with it.

  9. KellyGirl
    January 8, 2007 12:23 pm

    OK- first off, Debbie is NOT a tart! I used to work with her brother and heard and saw all of the wedding photos/info first hand. He paid lots and lots for her “body wraps” so she could get into that wedding dress and then gained alot of weight and kept it on for a long time.

    I have not seen her recently, but I am sure she isn’t anthing to write home about.

    Also – my friend was the one who sold that gaudy mansion – we were able to get a tour – WHEW! can you say gold lame EVERYWHERE???

    ITA with the rest of you – money does not buy taste – especially in this case!

  10. ethan
    January 8, 2007 12:24 pm

    not a personal fan, but he employs a lot of people in the region. that’s a good thing in my book.

  11. Julie_Gong
    January 8, 2007 12:34 pm

    A hyena? Really? Awesome!

    My Aunt used to work a Nemacolin and she took me to see his house once. Awesome. And his child has a exact replica play house. Lucky biatch!

  12. Woy
    January 8, 2007 12:41 pm

    Am I the only human being around that had no idea who the hell this guy is/was?

  13. Aeran
    January 8, 2007 1:59 pm

    nope, you’re not alone, Woy…

  14. Hardy's Hyena
    January 8, 2007 4:25 pm

    Maybe the employees are hoping that the Hyena will eat Joe.

  15. PittCheMBA
    January 8, 2007 7:13 pm

    Hyena? They could have gotten Joey Porter’s pitbulls at a discount!

  16. RIchmond K. Turner
    January 8, 2007 9:47 pm

    Connellsville’s airport is really a treat to visit. I did a few landings there back in my flying days. It’s like some perpetual civil defense emergency down there. You land, shut off the engine, get out, walk around, and there is simply nobody to be seen. Which is weird, because the airport usually has somebody on the radio (UNICOM) who will tell you what the winds are doing and if there are any other aircraft in the traffic pattern (as if!). But you never actually SEE anybody once you are on the ground. It’s spooky. I got scared and got the hell out of there before they hyenas got me.

  17. mimi
    January 8, 2007 10:11 pm

    Sorry, but I am being NICE by referring to Debbie as a tart. I could have said what I really thought – that is by calling her a big fat disgusting greedy bitch.

    I heard she called Donna Moonda to get a few numbers of people Donna was in rehab with.

  18. Heavy T
    January 8, 2007 10:18 pm

    After reading this post I had to learn more about the Hyena. I came across a very informative web site and found the following. I wonder if Joe has a male or female Hyena?

    Q: Is it true that hyenas can change sexes?
    A: No mammal can do that. What is true is that the female hyena’s genitals look just like the male’s: she has a huge clitoris she can erect at will and even has a sack of fibrous tissue that looks like testicles.

    Q: My God, why?
    A: No one knows for sure. We know what it’s used for: the hyena greeting ceremony. Each hyena sniffs and licks the other’s genitals and erects its own penis or clitoris. It’s like dogs sniffing each other’s rumps. Erection is voluntary, like raising your arm.

    Q: All this stuff has made me think about getting myself a pet hyena. Do you know where I can get one, and what they need in captivity?
    A: I do not recommend any wild animal as a pet, much less a carnivore, much less a large carnivore. More often than not, it ends up with the animal suffering terribly and even being killed, and sometimes with human beings being mauled or killed as well. (And think about the legal repercussions if a child reaches in through the fence to pet your hyena and gets bitten…) For these reasons, I will not tell you how to get a pet hyena. Please don’t ask.

  19. mimi
    January 9, 2007 8:53 am

    The hyena will probably be better company than the TART!

  20. dressagelady
    January 9, 2007 9:04 am

    I’m definitely not jealous of Hardy, cityworker. I’d rather be poor and respected then rich and not. I think it’s appalling, rich or not, to completely act like a fool at a serious event, such as the one I mentioned previously. I’m from Fayette County, and that’s typical Hardy-style. He’s off his rocker.

  21. trinity
    January 9, 2007 9:36 am

    having grown up in the bentleyville & cokeburg area, i can appreciate what joe hardy does for the area.

    his house in rostraver township is still huge & ugly & gaudy.

  22. Clarion
    January 9, 2007 10:16 am

    poor hyena.

  23. mimi
    January 9, 2007 12:41 pm

    Oh please – his employees are not treated all that well. And Debbie still the fat arrogant bitch she always was, the only difference being now is that she is a divorced rich fat arrogant bitch.

  24. Lino Gunn
    January 9, 2007 2:12 pm

    With all due respect to Julie_Gong; FayetteNam, that explains it all.

  25. Zsa
    January 9, 2007 4:04 pm

    Jeez mimi, settle down.

    Joe has put $$ in a friend of mine’s pocket, and that’s good enough for me. If you want to get into personal lives I don’t know that a lot of us would have jobs.

  26. Matt
    January 9, 2007 4:10 pm

    Screw Joe Hardy!

  27. Bananarama
    January 9, 2007 8:00 pm

    When was the last time any of you were in an 84 Lumber store? Third world sweat shops are more pleasant to work in — actually, in this cold weather, sweat shops WOULD be better, because there is ONE source of heat in an 84 Lumber, a light hanging over the cash register. The stores are rodent infested, and the employees (all 4 of them per store) are seriously underpaid and overworked. Thanks, Joe.

  28. Bram
    January 10, 2007 4:39 am

    PittGirl, when my birthday rolls around, if you could be a doll and please refrain from blogging about it.

  29. mimi
    January 10, 2007 1:03 pm

    Hey Matt – I think Debbie the Tart already did!

    Bananarama – you are right! But, some of the former employees of Big Joe’s I have known were not happy and did, in fact, move on to some things much much better. I guess when you have more money than God you can do whatever you want.

    Okay, he put some $$ in someone’s pocket. Big F#*king deal! That is one person, right?

    Let me tell you, when he lived in USC with his first wife, who was a beautiful lady inside and out, he was a jagoff – to her and to others around. And I know this for a fact as I was one of them, thank you.

  30. Zsa
    January 10, 2007 4:02 pm

    Yes, Sofa King (I just now got your name. Gotta get up pretty early to get one past this li’l gal), I was speaking figuratively. Joe H didn’t literally put his hand in my friend’s pants. Although that would have been interesting.

    He might blow some of his money on ridiculous things, but like ethan said above, he employs many people in the region as well. I’d rather he walked his hyena around my block than pull up stakes and move to Monte Carlo with all his $$.

  31. Lino Gunn
    January 10, 2007 11:03 pm

    Damn, this is better than Rosie and The Donald.

  32. mimi
    January 11, 2007 10:26 am

    I would agree with that – Big Joe is about as obnoxious as both of them.

  33. Sofa King
    January 14, 2007 2:46 pm

    Hmm…when I try to post from work, I get flagged as a spammer now. A little help here…?

  34. Susanne
    February 16, 2007 1:00 pm

    Jeez peeps. He’s an old dude. He does employ lots of uneducated otherwise tax burdens from surrounding towns. He is wealthy beyond. He puts his conquests up for display in his hotel for all to enjoy. My family likes seeing the changes and additions to his place. Art work, orginal Audoubon Society books, artifacts. There is not a thing i can think of he does not have. So he got a hyena? He’s also wasting alot of money on a dog of a town with people who do nothing to rise themselves above the poverty level. I think he is trying to help here and there. He is doing more for locals then any of us jealous fools.

  35. i worked in the 84 offices
    February 27, 2007 10:22 pm

    not only was he awful awful awful to work for (not everyone you encounter is tree-stump dumb, JAH, so don’t talk down to everyone) but he has no appreciation for the little people, especially if you’re toiling away for his benefit. he’s a greedy bastard. he’d go anywhere in the country on one of his two private jets and talk to those locals as if they owed him their lives. his exwife debbie’s almost as bad as the late anna nicole–started out as a nothing (debbie was his secretary at corporate) and ended up with lots of money. oh, and she also brought in two of the worst-behaved and ungrateful little girls that washington county has seen. but then she was seen in a bar in belle vernon doing exactly what joe did to his sick first wife. karma’s a bitch.

    debbie’s also a pain in the ass to work for. she likes to remind her employees that they are pieces of shit and they aren’t going anywhere in their lives. um, excuse me, but aren’t you a lazy bitch who’s living off her exhusband’s billions?

    don’t let me start on maggie and *her* philandering ways……………….

    did anyone notice that he’s revitalizing yin-yins-tahn for the benefit of nemacolin? why would people with that kind of money want their first impression of that fancy-schmancy resort be downtown uniontown? i mean, really.

    king of the hill isn’t open anymore. business went downhill.

    ok, i’m done. :-) yay for the hyena.

  36. Thatsmyword
    May 15, 2007 12:43 pm

    I would just like to say that I date Debs personal assistant ( if you dont believe me I would gladly answer any questions to anyone who thinks they know Deb on a personal basis ) and she is not that bad. As far as Joe he is an asshole and he does look down on ” regular people.” I was at one of his restaurants and people tried talking to him and he mad a comment ” I dont have time for these common folk ” and he rushed outa there. What an ass. Anyways Deb is a cool lady and down to earth. She has done a lot of favors for a lot of ” common folk ” that I know. People just dont understand what its like to have money like that and the pressure it can put on you. As a matter of fact the channel 4 news is over there right now as I type this because of leaked info about a fight that happened between her and her current husband Paul. Check the news tonight for details. Anyways dont judge people out of jealousy because that is whats going on here.

  37. Jim
    February 18, 2008 11:51 pm

    The guy forgot how he made money. From the common worker builder. Screw this asshole he’s gonna learn pain as this building bust screws his business.