The photo that ruined Lukey’s day.

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Poor dear. It’s your birthday. You’re 27. You’re going bald.


  1. spoon
    February 8, 2007 8:23 am


    oh hell, “Looks like his bald spot is ‘moving forward'”

    Wait I have one more…

    “Luke is ‘moving forward’ to blow out his cake”

    Ok, I’ll stop. Luke, buddy, shave your head. trust me it makes a world of difference in the summer (and cold as hell right now).

  2. Rob
    February 8, 2007 8:32 am

    There’s a topological theorem that proves hair has to have a singularity — an area it radiates from. What you’re calling the “bald spot” is a combination of this theorem and a standard problem in photography — certain angles make the hair appear thinner.

    The singularity is what causes Dennis the Menace’s cowlick and why Donald Trump’s hair looks like something not of this universe.

    Luke might be going bald, but you can’t tell from this picture. Check several pictures and see if the “bald spot” moves. This one appears off to the side, which is what makes me suspicious.

    I went through my photos from the East Hills High Rise Implosion and none of them give the impression that Luke’s going bald. He does have a very short haircut, which will make just about anyone appear bald from a great variety of angles.

    If he is, he really ought to consider minoxidil — if this photo indicates he’s going bald, it’s in a way that minoxidil can often treat.

    BTW: If you’ve ever heard the expression “Black holes have no hair,” then you’ve been exposed to this topology theorem through your astrophysics. Black holes can’t have “hair” (a magnetic field or anything with poles) because the singularities the hair has in being combed would give you further information on the interior of the black hole beyond mass, charge, and rotation.

    Gosh, this is “white and nerdy” even by my standards.

  3. Anonymous
    February 8, 2007 9:23 am

    Balding is a surefire sign of maturity.

  4. Rob
    February 8, 2007 11:44 am

    Anon —

    Age != maturity

    Also, while the general trend is that we’re more likely to go bald as we get older, the onset of balding is related to genetics. I know someone who started going bald at 16 and finished it by 18.

  5. Lino Gunn
    February 8, 2007 1:15 pm

    You spend too much time alone. Ya gotta get out more boy !

  6. the Dude
    February 8, 2007 2:48 pm

    I think he is just donating his excess hair to Onorato.

  7. Sofa King
    February 8, 2007 3:45 pm

    This is an easy fix…just have Ken Rice’s look-alike donate his copious excess uni-brow hair to patch up Luke’s bald spot.

    Problem solved.

  8. Hmmmm
    February 8, 2007 8:55 pm

    Where have I seen Luke in that pose before? Was it that time I saw him with Danny Onorato?

  9. guess who
    February 10, 2007 9:45 am

    Hey Hmmmmm – Well, whatever do you mean?

  10. Hmmmm
    February 10, 2007 12:07 pm

    Speaking figuratively!