Are these random posts driving you all batshit? It’s just there are so many things that run through my head that posting each one individually would really be cumbersome. If it bothers you, I don’t want to hear about it. Cowboy up.
1. Last night, I was walking through my living room while American Idol was on and TIVOing (I don’t do commercials) when they showed a little nine-ish-year-old girl on screen crying hysterically over Sanjaya singing. I’m so mean because: oh, how I pointed and laughed.
2. This morning on my bus, we passed a sign at a car lot that was altered by some hooligans who ripped off the bottom sticky outie thingies on the f’s in the word buff so that the sign now appears to read, “BUTT WAX, $79.95!” I’m obviously a juvenile because: oh, how I pointed and laughed.
3. I sat next to a woman on the bus today who quite obviously spilled a bottle of perfume on herself. She was dressed in designer everything and carrying a $500 purse, so I bet it was some expensive perfume (why does expensive perfume always smell the worst?). Somebody should tell her that wearing perfume should cause the person sitting or standing right next to you and ONLY the person sitting or standing right next to you to go, “Mmm. What is that scent?” NOT cause an entire busload of people to go, “HOLY SHIT, WHAT IS THAT SMELL?!?!” This public service announcement brought to you by PittGirl. I need an Advil or something.