She-Ra the Succubus

So there’s this female sergeant, Carol Ehlinger, on the Pittsburgh police force who apparently thinks she’s the baddest ass out there.

I won’t burden or bore you with the whole dealio, which you can read about here, but basically she is accused of choking a rookie.

This isn’t the first time it has happened and THAT is what I want to draw your attention to.

In 1996, Officer Catherine Granger sued Sgt. Ehlinger and the city for civil rights violations, saying Sgt. Ehlinger grabbed her by the throat during a 1995 meeting and banged her head against a wall.

Sgt. Ehlinger admitted she violated policy, but said she grabbed Officer Granger as an impromptu training exercise. She said she did it because of complaints that Officer Granger wasn’t helping other officers with arrests.

So the next time my newspaper carrier throws my PG right under my gutter spout so it is fully soaked through, I will just grab him by the throat and bang his curly haired head against the railing on my porch and say, “I hope you’ve learned something from this impromptu training exercise that is sanctioned by the Pittsburgh police force. Now run along and see if your mommy can stop the bleeding. Oh, stop crying.”


  1. Bram R
    April 3, 2007 1:15 pm

    Sgt. Ehlinger must favor the same training techniques favored by Inspector Cleusseu (sp?) from the Pink Panther saga. Nothing wrong with that.

  2. bucdaddy
    April 4, 2007 9:27 am

    An hour or two in a locked room with Lynndie England and she’d be crying like a little girl. Oh, wait …

  3. Bram R
    April 8, 2007 2:25 am

    And by the way, that’s no She-Ra. She-Ra mostly threw people, and swatted their laser beams back at them. Choking is way more of a Xena move.


    “I just cut of the flow of blood to your brain. You have 30 seconds to live, unless you tell me what I want to know”