America’s Great Newspaper

Most awesome line you’re going to read in One of America’s Great Newspapers today:

Inmates get sanctioned if they’re caught with their heads in the toilet bowl.

And here you would have thought that putting your head in a toilet bowl would be a punishment and not something for which to be punished.

Do you think Paris Hilton put her head in her toilet bowl?

[smacks herself hard for mentioning She Who Should Never Be Mentioned By Name Again.]

The SECOND most awesome line you’re going to read today:

You always hear about these things happening across the country, but you never think it will happen in your own back yard.

What? A mudslide? A murder? A fire? A kidnapping?

No, a beetle.

He means LITERALLY in your own back yard.





6 Comments

  1. DW
    June 28, 2007 9:38 am

    I think the pics that accompy the toilet article are great! Ha.



  2. A
    June 28, 2007 10:34 am

    At least it is better than this article from the TribPM…

    http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pittsburghtrib/news/tribpm/s_514490.html



  3. Zsa
    June 28, 2007 10:40 am

    If that bug walked into a bar, I would buy it a drink. It looks so badass.



  4. Slidetuba
    June 28, 2007 12:06 pm

    Looks like Lukey is looking for something he shat..



  5. JeepJeep
    June 28, 2007 1:48 pm

    *DING*



  6. TRUTHTELLER
    June 28, 2007 4:23 pm

    I wonder what that kid is looking for…