Random n@.

1. Teacher. Wordsmith. Madman. went and took a big giant hammer and with one fell swoop, hit the nail on the head: PG NOW is practically the fraternal twin of The Onion! Awesome!

2. While you’re at the Onion, check this out because it is SO true! When is the last time you had french fries from BK that did NOT have an onion ring thrown in? Also awesome!

3. Man, and all this time, I thought it was engine noise! Best line:

But if you’re already feeling gassy when boarding the plane, Dr. Raymond said, “You’re just about doomed.”

(h/t Toni)

4. WTF?

Pittsburgh Animal Control officers discovered an alligator in a Downtown fountain Thursday morning. This is the fifth alligator found in Pittsburgh this year.

I’m going to just tell myself that these are people’s abandoned pets and not so much that alligators are migrating to the Burgh. We don’t need alligators in the Burgh, damn it! Unless they’re here to eat pigeons … or Steely McBeam. Then by all means … WELCOME! (h/t Joe M)

5. The Burgh slipped a little in Forbes rankings for the best cities for singles, as in we’re pretty much close to the worst city for singles. New this year, they picked the most eligible bachelor and bachelorette from each city. Pittsburgh’s winners?

The Duke of Fug and the Earl of Gross and Michele Fabrizi, 54-year-old executive at Marc/USA.

I guess it’s not helping our case much that we’re a hot happening city for singles when the most eligible people are Benny and this chick:

Read it here.

(h/t Jordan)

6. The day I eat a pigeon is the day that David Conrad asks me to. Gross. (h/t Spoon who met this lady at Podcamp Pittsburgh 2)





16 Comments

  1. bucdaddy
    August 24, 2007 10:15 am

    4. The gators started showing up about the the Pirates created that fugly Captain Hook mascot. Coincidence?

    5. I’d hit him before I’d hit her. Gah. And she’s roughly in my age bracket. Make fun of Joe Hardy all you want, but here’s why he marries 23-year-olds.



  2. bucdaddy
    August 24, 2007 10:19 am

    5. And wouldn’t Joe now be the city’s most eligible young bachelor?



  3. BBM
    August 24, 2007 11:17 am

    5. That’s the best they could do for most eligible bacholorette? Seriously? And why is she posing with Lance Bass’s Dad in that picture?



  4. DW
    August 24, 2007 12:16 pm

    Sonni, anyone? Forbes folks need a head check.



  5. burghguy138
    August 24, 2007 12:26 pm

    I’ve met that lady- she’s a huge bitch! No wonder the singles scene is so bad if she’s the most eligible woman



  6. PittCheMBA
    August 24, 2007 12:41 pm

    #5 – Nothing against the 54 yr old lady, but how can a 54 yr old female be the most eligible single lady in the Burgh? I agree with DW, what about Sonni, Alison Morris, Stephanie Watson, Ashley DiParlo, or even PittGirl?



  7. Tinare
    August 24, 2007 1:25 pm

    #5 At least we’re ahead of both Cleveland and Cinncinati… right???



  8. NoSide15212
    August 24, 2007 1:28 pm

    1. And still no one will read it.

    2. Even better:
    http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/this_gap_sweater_is_fucking

    5. Seriously, who is writing/researching this crap for Forbes? Whatever; here’s another picture of Fabrizi’s date from a different angle:

    http://images4.fotki.com/v45/photos/4/43690/520016/unisex03-vi.jpg



  9. spoon
    August 24, 2007 1:35 pm

    see you just had to go and mention Alison. Now my concentration is shot for this afternoon :)



  10. bucdaddy
    August 24, 2007 2:06 pm

    Alison Morris certainly looks yummy, but next to “Why I became a journalist” she says: I’m a “people person” and it’s a great way to truly connect with the world I live in.

    Bravo! Spoken just like a TV reporter! None of that “afflict the comfortable and comfort the afflicted” shite for me!



  11. Pensgirl
    August 24, 2007 3:20 pm

    On the male side, if they wanted a celebrity there’s a perfectly good one across the river at the Igloo. Sure, he can’t have a beer with ya, but nor are beer goggles required to ogle look at him. On the female side, they clearly just went with the first single woman they bumped into. They shoulda been lookin’ for a hot chick with a cellphone camera kicking pigeons (assuming she’s eligible…not my business).



  12. KGC
    August 24, 2007 5:28 pm

    Re:
    #1 – The new PG Website has to be the fugly and non-user friendly site ever conceived. Hands dow.
    #5 – She is only a few years older that me. Eeeewwww. My eyes! My eyes! Sorta reminds me of Tabatha’s mother on Bewitched. Probably just as evil. If I were looking for a single, a 54-yo is not exactly on the menu… now, early 30’s… hmmmm.



  13. TC
    August 25, 2007 9:35 am

    Wonderful. As if this city didn’t have enough old people, now Forbes is doing their damndest to make Pittsburgh a hotspot for the “retired and horny” crowd?

    Forbes, what did we ever do to you? Why do you hate us so? Or was she the only local subscription to your magazine that was not a dentist’s office?



  14. TRUTHTELLER
    August 25, 2007 2:37 pm

    Hmmm…makes me glad to be a heterosexual female.



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  16. LMAO
    September 8, 2008 10:48 am

    They covered the age spectrum. Ben-GROSS! Michele fabrizi is a very wealthy and accomplished woman…She was a good choice. Those tv girls are not accomplished and don’t do anything for the city. SIDNEY should’ve been our male.