What they’re really thinking: Blue Suede Shoes Edition

… and we’re back, Burghers.

While I tempered my enthusiasm for such an awesome game with the cold hard fact that the Browns suck ass so there’s no way to tell how good the Steelers are going to be this year … Family of PittGirl was much more enthusiastic.

1.  During the pregame show on CBS, which Bill Cower is now a part of, Boomer Esiason stated that it must be nice for Benny this year “to have a coach that trusts him.”  Hah!  Also, I’m pretty sure Bill Cowher got some new, shiny, giant, white, horsey teeth.

2.  It was at about 1:41 seconds remaining in the first quarter that Sister of PittGirl declared, “We’re going all the way this year!”  Really.

3.  Santonio Holmes did his best to make PittGirl remove “The Asshat” sticker from his forehead with a gorgeous touchdown reception.  But then he had to go and drop a pass.  Sticker remains, you butter-fingered, baby mama-beating asshat.  Yes, I’m being hard on him.  What of it?

4.   Benny did not throw an interception!  When’s the last time that happened?  Probably when he was grocery shopping or something.

5.  I looked so hard and could not spot one single Browns fan waving a Dirty Brown Towel.  That’s because the Dirty Brown Towel is to the Browns fans what Steely McFrickin’ McBeam is to the Steelers fans.  Also, Steely McBeam is the giantest vacuum of suck EVER!

6.   Smoking hot Burgher Daniel Sepulveda kicked ass.  Hard.

7.  It was at 35 seconds left in the game when Father of PittGirl declared, really, that “Elvis has just left the building.”

This was because up until 35 seconds left in the game, he was concerned that the Browns would miraculously pull 27 points out of their asses, because with the way they play, that’s pretty much the only place they’d find points.

8.  Finally, I would have liked to see a little bit more from Troysus.  Particularly a little bit more of his bare chest.   But I’ll live.


  1. north sider
    September 10, 2007 12:08 pm

    Such a long awaited post. You never let us down, PittGirl. Never.

  2. z
    September 10, 2007 12:24 pm

    Great post. I’m chuckling out loud. Keep up the good work.

  3. DW
    September 10, 2007 12:36 pm

    Ditto on the above…I sent it to all my football obsessed pals. Great captions on the pics and a great summary!!

    Hell, I’d rather read this than the PG or Trib anyday!!

  4. Darwin Police
    September 10, 2007 12:44 pm

    My mom, who’s a dental hygienist, immediately said that it looked like Cowher’s had some dental work, too.

    I’m more inclined to believe that he looks different because we’ve never actually seen his top row of teeth before.

  5. chrys
    September 10, 2007 12:55 pm

    I think Bill Cowher was horrible.. they didn’t let him say much.. His voice is way to gravely to be a commentator. He really is quite boring, not much energy at all! My money is on him taking the money from CBS this year and back to coaching next season.. possibly the Browns..LOL! I see it now.. and I don’t like what I see.

  6. SportyGal85
    September 10, 2007 1:33 pm

    I thought it looked like Cowher got some veneers…but I thought it was just me. Nothing wrong with that, you should definitely get your grill fixed before going on television. His new teeth look a little funny though, oh well, it’s the effort that counts.

  7. Susanne
    September 10, 2007 2:05 pm

    ahhh PG! You got my hurtin hung over ass to chuckle today. HAHA! darn I missed Cowher. Anyone have any screen captures?

  8. NY Luvs Pitts
    September 10, 2007 3:16 pm

    PG, You make my sides hurt.

  9. Still A. Fan
    September 10, 2007 7:09 pm

    #2 hell yes we are

    cowher’s new grill = piano lessons. his teeth looked just like white piano keys. i think all the talk about piano lessons was just to cover all the trips to the oral surgeon. true that.

  10. NoSide15212
    September 10, 2007 7:18 pm

    PittGirl are we related? My family (mother, who was watching poolside in Orlando and, incidentally, draining the bottom of her 3rd bloody mary BEFORE they even kicked off) shares the same unbridled optimism. “I’m telling you…I think this is our year.” The Old Man piped up a few times about the Steelers playing a “complete game…I tell you they can’t be stopped.” He also knocked a lamp over, which scared the living s*@t out of the family dog, who in turn knocked over another lamp….you can take ’em out of Pittsburgh, PittGirl……..

  11. Millie
    September 11, 2007 1:39 pm

    I always look forward to your after-the-game posts, especially the pictures and captions. The one with Ben made me laugh out loud.

  12. danopsu
    September 11, 2007 3:27 pm

    I agree….good stuff PG!

    September 16, 2007 11:44 am