Normally I don’t like blowout games, but golly gee, I like ‘em when they’re that much fun and when it means I get to see Ray Lewis try his damnedest to motivate a team that’s down by four touchdowns and probably wishes he would shut his big fat loser mouth.
I was half-tempted to write my post at half-time because there was so much Steeler goodness wrapped around a creamy nougat center that I was afraid I was going to forget everything that made me tingle.
1. I told you Troy was going to show up and have you met Troy Polamalu, because he was at the party last night.
2. Did Steve McNair say something bad about James Harrison’s mama? After a monster game like he had, I gotta believe he was defending the honor of someone. Maybe his mom. Maybe his sister. Maybe Benny who got spanked hard the last time they played the Ravens. Maybe PittGirl. Consider my honor defended, James.
3. All of the Steeler greats were there. Including Terry Bradshaw, who as you know has had a rocky relationship with the Burgh in years past. That’s not the case any longer, as I’ve never seen anyone so giddy to be at a Steelers game.
4. Even The Chin showed up and brought his new veneers!
5. Poor Brian Billick. The Ravens sucked so bad he was forced to return to teaching Football Fundies 101.
6. I mean, have you ever seen a bigger bunch of sissies?
7. Finally, I am aware that I give Benny a hard time, and well, deservedly so. I am also aware that I have given the Asshat a hard time, and again, DESERVEDLY SO!
However, last night, watching Benny do that thing where he shakes off 300 lb. charging rhino linebackers like they’re dandruff on his shoulders, finds an open man in the end zone, and then while on the run fires a number-seeking missile that burns a hole between the 1 and the 0 or the 2 and the 5 … well, it makes me swell inside.
Usually it take a lot for PittGirl to swell up inside. It takes a repeated viewing of The Notebook or Moonlight, or the first pumpkin spice latte of the season, or a kiss on the cheek from David Conrad, or the rotting corpse of an evil pigeon.
But last night, watching Benny be absolutely flawless and watching the Asshat run his hot, bow-legged self into the endzone to make clip-reel worthy catches, well … I swelled! I got a bit teary!
I wanted to find Benny and the Asshat and, I don’t know, maybe birth them some children or something.
They were that good last night and they deserve every single ounce of praise lavished upon them today, by you, by the media, and by the evil PittGirl.
Some days, being a Steelers fan is everything that it should be.