1. How very unlike PittGirl to lead off the week with a Craigslist ad, but damn, I really need this thing explained to me. Did they finally invent the full body condom or something? W.T.F. is that? You know what? I don’t want to know. (mostly safe for work, I think. I don’t know.)
Also, ladies, if you’re about to, you know, get it on with a man and he starts crawling inside of a giant balloon, there is a 100% chance you should run away screaming. That’s in the Bible, right?
2. A CMU grad has a business that offers nap-pods to allow employees to nap during the work day.
Metronaps offers businesses the opportunity to increase productivity by helping workers to take naps. The service includes an “energy assessment” that surveys workers to evaluate the impact of fatigue in the workplace and seminars that offer workers tips on boosting energy.
But the centerpiece of the Metronaps is the Energy Pod, a souped-up lounge chair that looks like it would fit in the Jetsons’ living room. The EnegyPod incorporates a semi-spherical dome to help shut out the world, a built-in music player to help the napper slip into dreamland, and a timer which ends the sessions with lights and vibration for a gentle wakeup.
A nap in the middle of the work day after I’ve had 5 hours of sleep the night before — a nap that takes place in a super comfy lounger, includes the ability to shut the world out and surrounds me with soft music — and you think some lights and a little vibration is going to wake me up?
Unless that chair violently catapults me out of it with a stern, “Bitch! Wake up!” you can pretty much just forget about me ever getting any work done ever again. Ever.
3. The Carbolic’s weather report cracked my shit up today.
4. Anthony (Tunesmith. He is dead to me.) has a nice selection of Valentine’s Day gifts for the romantic yinzers in the Burgh. If The Asshat is looking for something just right, I think this would fit the bill:
5. The Penguins eight-game win streak came to an end at the hands of the Thrashers’ Mark Recchi. Karma. It is a boomerang.
6. I would snark on this wonderful collection of Olan Mills photos, except I definitely have some worse ones hanging out in a box in my parents’ house. (h/t CoolMommy123 and another reader whose email I can’t find now)
7. A huggable urn. Not so much of a “what the hell” but more of an “ewwwww” for me. Boy, don’t let your new puppy get a hold of that chew toy. (h/t Zach)
8. Last week, a man in Idaho thought he saw the mark of the beast on his hand, so he cut his hand off and microwaved it. Which is funny, because just not too long ago, I thought I saw the mark of the beast on a pigeon, so I microwaved it. Only way to go when it comes to the mark of the beast. That’s in the Bible, too, right?