Carpe Testes

Thanks to a well-funded, well-organized campaign that began, I don’t know, decades ago, we ladies know that we have to … well … check our boobs, yo. This is so we don’t die of breast cancer. My grandmother died of breast cancer. It’s a bitch.

We are reminded at every turn, with commercials, ad campaigns and articles in our magazines, pull out and hang in your shower laminated how-to cards complete with pictures … that we must feel our boobs for lumps in between our doctor appointments at which time our doctor will then feel our boobs for lumps.

It is now such a normal everyday occurrence that it is not unusual for us ladies to be enjoying a lovely lunch and to comment in between dainty bites of lettuce, “So, the other day I was feeling my boobs in the shower, and the phone rang …”

I have a point here. And I’m getting to it.

Reader Sarah emailed me a link to this video that “her friend did.” I don’t know if that means the dude is her friend, or her friend wrote it or directed it or what. That’s not the point, the point is … guys? Have you checked your donkey omelets lately to see if there’s a third one growing? More importantly … do your testicles feel okay?

It’s a catchy tune. And funny as all get out. Check it out.