Random n@.

1. This morning I headed to McDonald’s to get some coffee to wake me up because I’m a doofus and I stayed up late to catch up on some Tivo, some emails, and some reading and after five hours of sleep, I’m just a smidge delirious. As I waited patiently in line to order my large coffee with two creams, a man of about 30 walks in with a garbage bag full of belongings and a big umbrella in his hands. He wasn’t homeless or anything I don’t think because he was clean-shaven, wearing decent clothes, nice boots and a nice jacket. And he had a cell phone. So … he marched up to the front of the line, leaned over the counter and banged on it with his open hand, and shouted, “Hey! Yo! Hey! Can I get an application!?”

He is SO getting hired.

2. Lukey is PISSED because snow removal in the city bites all sorts of ass. He says:

Mr. Ravenstahl, of Summer Hill, said he ordered the Public Works Department to “plow my street last,” but believes his order was ignored. “I know there were trucks on my street,” he said. “They don’t listen to me.”

He said he will reiterate the order.

So many jokes, so little time.  Write your own.

3. The Pens lost last night (it’s okay.) and also lost newly reacquired boyfriend of Sonni Abatta Kris Beech who probably broke his wrist. It’s still going to be okay.

4.  SpyGate is still going strong, with Sen. Specter refusing to let it die.  You know, if the Patriots had won the Super Bowl this year, I’d be all over this.  Granted, they may have gained an advantage during their previous Super Bowl runs, but the fact of the matter remains that like Barry Bonds, the Patriots will always have an asterisk next to their Super Bowl wins because of this and that shadow of cheating will forever be a factor in why they will not be considered to be nearly as great a dynasty as the Steelers of the 70s, and that asterisk and never-fading shadow are good enough a punishment for me.

Former Steelers coach Bill Cowher, reached at his home in North Carolina yesterday, said:

“Is it an advantage to steal signals? Yes. Did it determine the outcome of the game? No.”

Ah, North Carolina.  Lucky bastard.

5.  Poor Kelly Frey.


You can rest assured readers that if PittGirl ever puts a “face bra” on, one of two things is happening … someone is holding a gun to my head or a pigeon to my eyeballs.

No frickin’ way.  I keep my good looks the old-fashioned way.  Booze and cigs.

6.  Speaking of booze and cigs and fake legs … here’s a picture of that “former homecoming queen” that beat the shit out of her sister with her sister’s very own fake leg during a fight that occured in where else but their TRAILER.



  1. Leslie
    February 15, 2008 9:53 am

    1. This is why I’ll only go to McDonalds by force… OR during shamrock shake season, but even then I’ll drive through to avoid the freak show.

    6. This babe makes me want to throw a bag of ground meat out into the street for no reason.

  2. Kat
    February 15, 2008 10:20 am

    2. I get that Lukey’s pissed about the snow, but damn. There are a bajillion narrow, hilly streets with cars parked on both sides just within the city limits alone. Sure, it can be a pain in the ass, but they do what they can.

  3. Michael
    February 15, 2008 10:48 am


    Sounds like a country song in the making to me.

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  5. Johnny
    February 15, 2008 11:16 am

    I saw that Luke went for a drive to check out the streets himself.

    I assume it went something like this:

    Luke:”Dude! It’s raining in my office! I’m outta here! YoZo, ROADTRIP!”

    Yarone Zober: “SHOTGUN!

  6. amanda
    February 15, 2008 11:25 am

    I’m sure Luke’s neighbors will love it when Public Works actually does comply…

  7. Big Fan
    February 15, 2008 1:12 pm

    1. The McDonalds near Market square is the best entertainment that this city has to offer. Go there, park your ass in a booth for 10 minutes, and you will leave with a newfound appreciation for your life. (FYI: don’t step foot in the bathroom).

    2. When I read this, I felt bad for Lukey’s neighbors. Why should they have to suffer from non-plowed streets?

  8. jodi
    February 15, 2008 1:24 pm

    Dude. She beat her sister with her own fake leg? It doesn’t get any better than this!
    I honestly can’t stop laughing!!

  9. toni
    February 15, 2008 3:24 pm

    I hope Specter keeps the investigation going. I thought Belicheck should have gotten a tougher punishment than the fine but thats not what has my ire at the moment. It’s the fact that Roger Goodell DESTROYED EVIDENCE before he even looked it over!!!!!

    Now these tapes could have proved that Belichick was innocent of any wrong doing (HAAAAAA!!!!!!) OR they could have been evidence to show just how low Belicheck had sunk. But the main thig is, ROGER GOODELL DESTROYED EVIDENCE.

    The NFL is a business….a multi billion dollar business…and it wants state monies and grants and all kinda stuff (we’re still paying for Heinz Field, then it needs to prove it isn’t hiding or destroying potentially damaging evidence. Put the screws to him Arlen!

  10. JCIII
    February 15, 2008 3:33 pm

    ah, yes, the alcoholic former homecoming queen. Reading the Action 4 article, this really stuck out;

    “The ex-homecoming queen had two DUI convictions in Allegheny County in 1991. One was in Rankin, where police said she was so drunk she smeared her feces in the back of a police car.”

    Yep, nothing says par-tay like playing with your own poop. Rock on, sista, rock on.

  11. Dan (Not Onarato)
    February 15, 2008 4:10 pm

    5. Looked like KFrey go the crap beaten out of her with a fake leg or something…that face it too perty to hide

  12. W
    February 16, 2008 6:58 am

    mmm CinnaMelts are delicious (for what they are).

    If I were Luke’s neighbors, I’d be pissed because I’d hate to “have my street done last” because I lived on Ravenstahl Way. Also, he must not have went into South Pittsburgh, because many of those steets have yet to be salted!

  13. justretiredguy
    February 16, 2008 6:06 pm

    Some homeless individuals do have nice clothes and boots because people and organizations give them clothes or vouchers for clothes. When they are dirty they throw them out and get new. I was always amazed by the number of homeless people in city shelters with timberland boots and cell phones.

  14. xena
    February 18, 2008 12:39 am

    What bothers me about the Patriots and Belicheat is:
    1. When they went on their undefeated run, every idiot sportscaster in the country forgot they were cheaters! All day, every day, “This is the greatest team in the history of the NFL!” The only thing that saved us from decades of that stuff, of course, was that the greatest team gets its a** whipped in the Super Bowl because the football gods do not forget.
    2. They made me root for a Manning. Yeeesh.
    3. They kinda screw up the whole idea of sports, because it isn’t their talent or their genius or their heart that won the games. They knew what plays the opposite team was running. If the Pirates had the equivalent foreknowledge, they might finish at .500.
    4. They’ve got Arlen’s eyes off the Iraq War, a failing economy, $3 + gasoline, global warming, an Attorney General that is confused about torture, and the fact that the phone companies spied on their customers for the government in order to focus on the taping of football signals.
    5. We’ve got to listen to a former Steeler coach who squandered years with a man-crush on Kordell Stewart and spent the post-Super Bowl year getting ready to leave town while the team tanked. Yeah, Cowher….if Belicheat tapped the signals going into your QBs helmet, it didn’t effect the game. How would he know what Belicheat had?

  15. bucdaddy
    February 18, 2008 10:52 am

    Um … didn’t the Patriots go on to win a whole bunch of games (all except one) AFTER they got caught and, presumably, stopped? Would you be surprised if you found out the Giants somehow secretly taped Patriots practice for a week before the SB?

    This is the sports equivalent of the local news running half-hour special reports on 1/2 inch of snow.

    Molehill < mountain.

  16. Schultz
    February 19, 2008 10:18 am

    I grew up in the same neighborhood with the Sturkie family and spent many a snow day playing street hockey right outside their driveway. My brother went to high school with the both the sisters and one of his best friends still works for the father’s contracting company. The trailer park is on the other side of the highway from where my brother now lives in good ol’ NHT.

    The fact that I first heard about this on the Mike and Mike Sports Show here in Baltimore makes this story even more amusing.

    Oh, how I miss home.