1. It wasn’t even that cold, but Winter finally got to me this morning.
The wind was a little too biting. The cold reached a little too far beneath my skin. My coat seems to have quit working. Even the pigeons are sick of winter. Just this morning I saw a pigeon sitting on a curb on Fifth, with its wings wrapped like a blanket around his cold, shivering body, all, “Damn it. I am frickin’ sick of this. I’m frickin’ sick of the cold. I’m frickin’ sick of eating frozen french fries. I’m frickin’ sick of being kicked by PittGirl’s minions. I frickin’ hate people. And I frickin’ hope PittGirl —.”
That was when I kicked him. I was pretty sure he was going to offend my kind and gentle nature.
2. Nothing to do with Pittsburgh, butt:
ST. LUCIE COUNTY — Authorities said a man charged with exposure of sexual organs was showing a lot more than that on a stretch of U.S. 1 Thursday morning.
Callers told 911 dispatchers that David John Campbell, 41, of Fort Pierce was walking completely naked on northbound U.S. 1 near Kitterman Road.
Campbell said he was under instructions from Jesus to take the nude stroll.
Yeah, blame Jesus.
Also, what do they mean by “showing a lot more than that?” Really, what more can a man show than his “searing magnificence?”
Isn’t that like the be all and end all of indecent exposure?
(h/t Still A. Fan)
3. Pitt, after that awesome win over Georgetown on Saturday earning them the Big East crown, will take on Oral Roberts University in the first round of the NCAA tournament. Click here to watch the peace-loving Oral Roberts mascot Eli the Eagle take on a rival mascot Jawz the Jaguar in the most hilarious fight I have ever seen in my life and that includes the time my two four-year-old nephews decided that a fist fight over Lightning McQueen was worth a lifetime of time-outs.
Pshh. I got $20 that says the Pitt Panther beats the snot out of Eli the Eagle, ASPCA be damned.
Also, you just know the Furries are spontaneously orgasming over that video. I mean, that’s like their dream come true.
4. Speaking of basketball, PittGirl will be taking part once again in the Sportsocracy.org Pittsburgh Bloggers March Madness contest. Here’s hoping that I do better this year than last, when, as you may recall, my brackets imploded upon themselves after the second round. You may also recall how much I love to throw around the word bracket.
5. Speaking of brackets, but not really, here’s an adorable poem KDKA’s Dave Crawley wrote when he was 13-years-old about the Buccos of Suckitude back in 1960, you know, when they didn’t have PhDs in Suck.
6. Speaking of the Buccos of Suckitude, they beat Boston on a Freddy Sanchez double. See, that’s what Chad Hermann calls the occasional, fleeting whiff of mediocrity.
7. You know what’s romantic? Weddings. Weddings with dancing and cake and alcohol and if you’re really drunk The Bunny Hop. Weddings on the beach. Weddings on Mt. Washington.
Know what’s NOT romantic to PittGirl? Wedding photos that intentionally include what appears to be a flock of pigeons.
(h/t Anne Marie)
8. Have you voted yet for Pittsburgh’s own Something to be Desired for a Yahoo Video Award? You haven’t? You suck.
They’re currently getting their asses kicked by something called The Guild. I haven’t ever seen The Guild, but as a Burgher supporting some talented Burghers, I can tell you without a doubt that The Guild is a sack of cow dung.
9. Pens rule! Pens rule!