Suckitude. Buccos of Suckitude.

1. Apparently we’re not shouting loud enough to let the Buccos of Suckitude know how much they suck, because again, they came THIS close to .500 ball and pfft. Nothing. Losers.

Let me say that louder:

LOSERS!

Here’s a handy way to have your body do the shouting for you. The most recent shirt to come out of the WearPittsburgh factory is a design created in partnership with the man behind the quote, Chad Hermann of TWM.

Beautiful. I’m thinking I need to see lots of these badboys at the next Buccos game. I’m also thinking these could be the official uniform of the Yinz Team softball team. Here’s my personal favorite style of the shirt.

2. While we’re here talking about suck and the Buccos, why not give your eardrums a good thrashing by exposing them to this song called “Jason Bay” sung earnestly and do you have a sharp stick I can use to puncture my eardrums-ly by a fan. Lyrics are below.

Jason Bay

He will hit the big home run today.
He’ll catch anything that comes his way,
The fans all cheer for Jason Bay.

3 men on,
Score is down, hope of a win is gone.
Bay hits one into the neighbors’ lawn,
the Pirates win, fans cheer ’til dawn.

He is number 1 and has fun each time he plays.
Pittsburgh’s favorite son, second none, is Jason Bay.

Jason Bay
Crowds miss him when he is not in play.
They hope he’ll be back by the next day,
‘Cause they are fans of Jason Bay.

“Pittsburgh’s favorite son?” Even his own mother wouldn’t call him that.

(h/t Sean who saw it here)

3. And finally, here’s a way you can help the Buccos of Suckitude not suck so hard. Write in Gary Roberts as a Pirate for the MLB All Star Game!

Also, I’d like to hear that chick sing a song called Gary Roberts to the tune of The Star Spangled Banner.

“Oh, say can you see, through the blood in your eyes,
that Gary Roberts hit you? Now you clutch your face screaming …”

Make it happen.

(h/t Emily)





12 Comments

  1. Magnus Patris
    May 15, 2008 12:14 pm

    Canadians who play Hockey (pronounced “Ock-ee”) = good; Canadians who play Baseball = Meh.



  2. Jennifer
    May 15, 2008 12:41 pm

    AUGH, MY EARS MY EARS!!! Not that you didn’t warn us, but by the time she got to the end of Baaaaaaaaay (the first one) there was blood running from my ears and tears from my eyes!!! The thing is, it makes it even funnier. I listened almost to the middle in that its so awfully awful I CAN’T TURN AWAY kind of way. Hats off to you for making it through to write down the lyrics. Your constitution is stronger than mine. (though spider[or was it howler?] monkeys and clowns don’t bother me at all)



  3. Kelli
    May 15, 2008 12:55 pm

    Did you see the post gazette?

    Gary has pnuemonia!

    But, of course, he says it like I would say I have lunch. Like no big deal.



  4. Angie :-)
    May 15, 2008 1:24 pm

    I am totally gonna Write in Gary Roberts as a Pirate for the All Star Game. and i am gonna tell al my freinds to do it too. :-)



  5. joey
    May 15, 2008 1:26 pm

    Writing Gary Roberts in as a Pirate for the All Star Game is terribly disrespectful……

    …to Gary Roberts…



  6. John
    May 15, 2008 2:29 pm

    Jason “Captain Complacent” Bay is NOT Pittsburgh’s favorite son. He’s not even Pittsburgh’s 4,872nd favorite son. Heck, Lukey has to rank higher on that list.



  7. PittinDC
    May 15, 2008 2:31 pm

    The Succos are coming to Baltimore to play the other Suck-O’s in June. Its going to be a three day stretch of mediocrity. I’m so buying that tshirt for the series.



  8. John
    May 15, 2008 3:23 pm

    Okay, I’ll shut up about Jason Bay for today since he just hit a 3 run homer to put the Succos on top. I chalk it up to the blind squirrel/acorn theory.

    PittinDC – I’ll be going to 2 of the 3 games the Succos play against the Orioles, making me a major masochist.



  9. Ex-Pat Pittsburgh Girl
    May 15, 2008 4:21 pm

    Gary Roberts doesn’t have pneumonia. Pneumonia has Gary Roberts. (can’t take credit for this, I saw it on the Pensblog).



  10. Brother Anthony
    May 15, 2008 5:33 pm

    At least one Pirate may have heard.
    In the Post-Gazette release after todays win. Ian Snell was asked to explain his rally-necessitating starting pitching performance:

    Snell had no explanation.
    “I [stink}, period,” he said.

    (I’m guessing he said “suck”. Therefore he said, “I suck, period.”)