I love your blog, and I just saw something I had to write you about… I play roller derby with the Steel City Derby Demons. The league had a game yesterday, and while I’d normally be there even though my team wasn’t playing, it was my grandma’s 90th birthday so I was out of town. Anyway, I checked our league forum today and saw a post entitled “The Ghost Whisperer.” Apparently, several of our skaters spotted David Conrad in attendance at our bout yesterday!!! How cool is that?!? I wish I’d been there! Anyway, you should come out to a bout sometime too…maybe you and David can make a date for our next one on June 14th!
And another from a FaceBook friend:
You should have been at Bladerunner’s in Harmarville last night for The Steel City Derby Demons, “Block of Love” bout. David Conrad was there. I didn’t get to see him, as I was skating with the Hellions.
Rhonda aka Fonda Bruises
First of all, Fonda Bruises is 41-years-old! And she can kick your ass.
Second, trying to wrap my brain around the fact that my future best friend David “can quote more Shakespeare than Shakespeare” Conrad not only attends roller derby bouts, but also SPONSORS them is like finding out that Paula Abdul has a doctorate in Speech Language Pathology. It doesn’t compute.
PittGirl, I said, This is intriguing. You must investigate.
So I did and I am loving these girls. I should have jumped on this bandwagon ages ago.
Okay, first, their team names. The best team name has to be The Bitch Doctors. I think I want to be a roller derby-er (or whatever you call them) just so I can say that I am a “bitch doctor.” Except, I’d say, “I’m a Bitch Doctor, bitch!” Yeah!
Now, the girls’ names are even better:
- Busty Brawler 36-DD
- Me-Oww Kitty
- Twiggy Stardust
- Miss Ass Fault
- Pinky Dontchadare-O
If their photos are any indication, some of these ladies might find themselves being named Smokin’ Hot Burghers, once I do some more research on them.
And the refs’ names and photos? Just as awesome.
- Big F’N Ref
- Hannibal Refter
So I’ve thought long and hard about what PittGirl’s roller-derby name would be and the answer is unavoidable: “Choke-A-Bitch”.
Do they do play-by-play during these things? If so, I hope it goes something like this:
Holy crap! Did you just see the hit Miss Ass put on Me-Oww Kitty!? She’s definitely not purring right now, in fact, I’m pretty sure I see some claws coming out. Big F’N Ref ain’t havin’ none of it. Uh-Oh. Pinky Dontchadare-O is making a bee-line for — Oh my GOD! It is on, my friends, because Choke-A-Bitch is currently CHOKING A FRICKIN’ BITCH! This is the best matchup EVER!
I might have to go to their June competition.