Random n’at.

1. People, friends, Burghers, my loves, I have lots of emails to respond to (I’m looking at you, Goob, Tracy, Kathleen, DW, and maybe 400 more), and I’m going to get to them. Watch your email boxes.

2. OMG. Srsly. Matt Capps. Inventing new ways to blow saves. Can we give up on this guy for a bit? At least until he stops betting against the Buccos of Suckitude. What is that, four blown saves in a row? Luckily, it didn’t matter yesterday.

3. Okay, I have to ask. Yesterday I was watching the Buccos game and I think in the sixth inning, Jose Bautista goes up to bat, right after my next possible self-united husband Dougie put up a nice sacrifice fly, and Dougie is shown telling Jose what to expect pitch-wise from the particular pitcher on the mound.

He was intense and all, “Jose?! Jose! Come ‘ere. Listen. Fastball. Low in the center. Firm. Curve. Pirates of Montezuma. Then another fastball. Wait.” Then he goes over to the bench, gets this little black book and continues, “Okay. Here we go. Fastball. Inside low. Curve. Montezuma’s Revenge. Medusa’s Spit. Wait for your pitch. Go get ’em, boy.”

Here’s my question. Don’t they have coaches for this kind of thing? They weren’t kidding when they said Doug was bringing leadership to this team.

Also? They still suck. But this year, I’m having more fun watching the suck.

4. The fix is in re: those kids that made the duct tape prom clothes.

The competition operated on a “one vote per person per day” principle, allowing voters so inclined to cast up to seven votes per week. Ms. Dranko said the couple currently in first place gained more than 60,000 votes in a single day.

I smell shenanigans.

5. Now that we’ve tied up Geno/Gino (which is it?) for about six years, I guess I don’t need to worry about pulling him off of my blog banner anytime soon. Whew. That’s all I was worried about.

6. Rumor mill whispers, according to Mondesi’s House, are that PittGirl’s dream might come true. Did the Penguins offer a contract to Jaromir Jagr? Gosh. I hope so.

You guys, picture it. Sid, Geno, Hossa, Jagr. I’m getting tingly.

7. Hines Ward a “dirty” football player?! According to the NFL Coaches Poll he is among them:

Dallas Cowboys safety Roy Williams, notorious for horse-collar tackling, finished second in the coaches’ poll with two votes. Four players drew one vote apiece: New York Giants linebacker Antonio Pierce, Pittsburgh Steelers receiver Hines Ward, Tennessee Titans center Kevin Mawae and Chicago Bears center Olin Kreutz.

Really? Okay, football fanatics, please explain to me how Hines is a dirty player because I’m obviously biased and see no wrong in Hines Ward. Other than maybe in his business management skills.

(h/t James)

8. Pittsburgh ranks 81 out of 100 in a listing of The Sweatiest Cities in America, based “on computer simulations of the amount of sweat an average person would have produced walking around in cities during the summer months last year.”

You can be a “half-full” person and say, “Hey! We’re not a very stinky people!”

Or you can be a “half-empty” person and say, “Yeah. That’s cause our summer weather sucks donkey omelets.”

(h/t DW)

9. The article that every man in America will be printing out and handing to his wife/girlfriend all, “There you go. Scientific, factual, cannot-be-disputed evidence that it’s good for you! I’m SAVING YOUR LIFE! You’re welcome.”

Be sure to take a look at that web address, though, ’cause I sure didn’t.

(h/t Capt. Dummy)


  1. Brian
    July 2, 2008 8:56 am

    3. This man must be kept. If anything, he should have a role to slap the hell out of these kids when they get on a losing streak and start to sink again. Having someone who has won championships before and played on top-caliber teams (Red Sox, Twins, Yankees) knows what it’s like to win and can teach these kids not to get lost in the fog. I doubt that’ll get them even to .500, but maybe he can help change their attitudes.

    5. It’s Geno. I assume because he’s EvGENi, so Geno.

    6. No Jagr AND Hossa. It’s one or the other, I assume. And I’m afraid it’s going to be neither.

    7. I look forward to Hines Ward bashing more puny linebackers and safeties this fall. He also was voted smartest offensive player in the league, so go figure.

  2. Pittsburgh Swallow
    July 2, 2008 9:03 am

    While I’m all for life-saving that’s also good fun, sadly this isn’t an actual article. Just another man trying to convince us that what’s better for him is good for us, too. Go get ’em ladies, but don’t expect to reduce your risk of breast cancer. Do it for the fun of it!

  3. Ben
    July 2, 2008 9:29 am


    I am VERY sorry to inform you that the CNN article is a fake. Look at the address bar that comes up when the page loads. It is decidedly not CNN. I feel that I may have betrayed my gender by pointing this out, but as science advances, I’m sure that new deseases witll be cured by BJ’s.

  4. pittgirl
    July 2, 2008 9:30 am

    Already indicated that in the post. Thanks, though!

  5. Allison
    July 2, 2008 9:32 am

    It’s Geno–The Sidney Crosby Show did extensive research on it…Besides, it’s even on the wallpaper on the Penguins site.

  6. Judge Rufus Peckham
    July 2, 2008 9:34 am

    It is sad the things men must do to promote better health:

  7. Fan on his own dime
    July 2, 2008 9:41 am

    Judge–my wife just read your comment and said that if I do my part and save it for her, we can kill two birds with one stone and save money on coffee creamer to boot!

  8. bucdaddy
    July 2, 2008 9:42 am

    9. I used to date a girl who will never die.

  9. pittgirl
    July 2, 2008 9:42 am


  10. unsatisfied
    July 2, 2008 10:00 am

    #3: how’s about doug’s diving grab in right field? he doesn’t even normally PLAY right field. sweet — though, wilson’s hustle in throwing out the red at 2B and nate’s sliding catch late in the game were pretty sweet, too.

    #6: personally, I’d rather see hossa than jagr — but, you’re right, we might see neither of them. it’ll be interesting to see who shero brings in to replace the ones who were not benevolent to take that hometown discount and left us….

    #9: I sent that article to my gfriend with hopes that she won’t pick up on it being fake.

    and, Ben said, “loads”…….

  11. Sean
    July 2, 2008 10:12 am

    I don’t know about the resaerch The Sidney Crosby show did or the wallpaper on the site, but according to the man himself, it’s Gino. Check out the closeup pic of his stick The Pensblog had up during the playoffs:


  12. Mark
    July 2, 2008 10:18 am

    Hines Ward is possibly one of the best blocking wide receivers (yes, you heard me) in the league, which is why people call him “dirty”…he hits away from the play. Cornerbacks and safeties getting laid out call that “dirty”. I call that “hustle”. And he smiles after doing it.

  13. unsatisfied
    July 2, 2008 10:42 am

    oh, yeah — forgot to add my 3 cents on hines ward being “dirty”.

    jack lambert was also called “dirty” back in the day.

    so, hines, wear that “dirty tag” like it’s a badge of honor. cuz, it is.

  14. Pensgirl
    July 2, 2008 10:59 am

    It’s “Geno.”

    First of all, a player’s equipment is not a good source of spellings. It’s not the players who put their names on equipment. Teams handle ordering and the manufacturer screenprints the names along with all the other logos and such. Some intern somewhere spelled it that way. I know someone who spotted “Hanon” on Dave Hannan’s sticks way back when.

    Also, the Pens’ website has a wallpaper of Malkin that says “Geno,” and that’s also what the jumbotron says when he scores. And on Nike’s Malkin page (he endorses them), it says “Nickname: Geno.” Those seem like more official sources, particularly the jumbotron.

    Pittgirl, if a hockey rumor issn’t posted on either TSN.ca or mirtle.blogspot.com, then it’s probably not true, and the Jagr rumor was not discussed at either of those sites. Don’t forget, the Pittsburgh media didn’t even know when Mario was coming out of retirement – that story was broken by a New York reporter. Just because it’s a “local” rumor doesn’t give it any credibility.

  15. Maria
    July 2, 2008 11:32 am

    I got all tingly when I heard the Pens offered Jagr a contract too. Unfortunately, it’s either Jagr OR Hossa, not both, like someone above mentioned. Also, as much as I would love to see Jagr and Sid play on the same line, I can’t see Jagr being very happy with playing second fiddle to The Kid. He has a pretty big ego. And I think he was offered more money than the Pens could ever give him to go back to Europe & play, and I could definately see him leaving the NHL if the price is right.

  16. James
    July 2, 2008 11:41 am

    The Jagr rumor has been on lots of hockey sites not just on local media. I don’t think it will happen, but it seems like a legit rumor if that’s not an oxymoron. There has also been talk the Pens offered Markus Naslund a contract. There is no way they can pay Jagr, Hossa, Orpik and Fleury (remember he’s not signed yet either).
    As for the spelling, it is just as plausible that the Pens website (which isn’t very good) or the guy who types words into the scoreboard are wrong. If I were to guess how Malkin would spell it, it would be with an “i”. When transcribed to english, the long “e” sound in most languages is usually spelled with an “i”, so Malkin would probably go with an i too. Although I don’t know anything about the Russian language and don’t really feel like looking it up. Remember though it’s just a nickname someone called him one day. Does anyone know who made it up? Maybe we should ask that person. Steigerwald (sp?) sometimes calls hime Gene. That would be weird with an i.

  17. Brian
    July 2, 2008 11:56 am

    And Hossa is gone. And for 1 year, $7.4 million to the RED WINGS. Yeah. Insult to injury. I want to punch someone in the face. We couldn’t have offered that to him? Well, get ready for another Wings Stanley Cup.

  18. retiredguy
    July 2, 2008 12:37 pm

    .4 Those kids that won the duct tape contest must be friends of the guy who used to work for Ravenstall. Ether that or they’ve taken a page from the playbooks of Richard Daley and LBJ.

  19. bucdaddy
    July 2, 2008 12:42 pm

    Why yes, Judge, now that you mention it I DO still think about her. She helps MY health, so I guess we came out even.


    BTW, before meeting me she was a D- student. After meeting me she cured cancer and the common cold (and is working on Texas Death), calculated pi to 100 million places using only an abacus, climbed Everest and K2 in the same day, and will run the 100 at the Beijing Games.

    Coincidence? Think about it, ladies.

    Bucdaddy: Purveyor of fine man-honey products since 1977.

  20. Alison
    July 2, 2008 12:57 pm

    i’m freaking out. Hossa? the Red Wings? anyone but them (i’d prefer the pens but still), anyone! goodbye hossa, good bye Conklin. i’d shed a tear if i wasn’t partially pissed off.
    But hossa is getting serious money for 1 year. maybe he’ll come back to us. i can dream, dont ruin it.

  21. bucdaddy
    July 2, 2008 1:05 pm

    Well, Hossa DID say he wanted to play for a winner.

    Insult + injury.

  22. Custard
    July 2, 2008 1:07 pm

    He’s not going to come back to us after one year. He’s looking to increase his price tag with the Wings. Go for even bigger money next year.

  23. John
    July 2, 2008 1:20 pm

    But Hossa is not getting seroius money there. (relatively of course, i know it’s still a ton.) The Pens reportedly offered him nearly the same contract and if they had the option of signing him to only one year, they probably would have upped the deal a bit. Face it, he chose the Wings over the Pens. That hurts big time, but i would put money on the Wings repeating next year. They’re gonna roll over the competition with all of their stars from last year, their role players still there, amazing defense and now Hossa.

  24. JP
    July 2, 2008 2:09 pm

    2-3 , a 3.12 ERA and 17 saves is not exactly the worst in the league for the end of June. In fact Capps is probably close to the top 15 relief pitchers in the league. Your imaginary husband or whatever you call it , is batting in the nieghborhood of 268 or so while nothing to sneeze at, is not remotely close to that feat in any category. Just saying

  25. unsatisfied
    July 2, 2008 2:31 pm

    the pens made a nice offer to hossa that was not accepted. the pens might have offered more:

    from the PG:
    “Had the Penguins been given the option of signing Hossa to a one-year deal, they almost certainly would have been willing to raise their offer significantly.”

    but, it most likely would have been more than what sid and malkin — hometown discounters! — are making. so — notgonnahappen.

    and, it sounds like orpik and ruutu might be gone, tuu (sorry, had to duu it). and, also sounds like they might still be talking to jagr and maybe even former pen markus naslund.

    gotta love free agency.

  26. DW
    July 2, 2008 2:41 pm

    Ruutu is gone, signed with Senators. I don’t get the 1 year deal for Hossa. We could’ve matched or beat it. With all due respect, I’d rather play w/ a Crosby and Malkin than Zetterberg or Datsyuk. But he made his choice and that’s cool. If he’s playing to try to win a cup next year, good choice of teams frankly. But if he’s also thinking he’ll put up monster numbers and make even more the following year, it’s a risky proposition. Only takes one whack to the knee to miss half to all the season. Who knows.

    People keep panicking, it’ll be alright. With the core in place, we’ll be competitive and solid…but to win a cup we’ll have to see what Shero can pull off and who he can bring in to surround the big boys.

    Brother, some of those teams out there are overpaying guys BIG TIME.

  27. Different Brian
    July 2, 2008 8:54 pm

    Ward does have a rep among certain in-divisional teams as being dirty. He makes lots of contact, and if a running play is coming his way, he’s going to do everything but hold opposing players, and not in a tender soft way. Opposing corners don’t like that because they are prima donnas and whining is what they do.

    If Ward played for say the Titans (I know, not in our division, but Jeff fisher is still a jerk) or the Browns, we here would HATE him. Because he would do everything he can to run block, and then he smiles at you. Or catches the most awesome pass in Super Bowl history. (Well at least till Tyree)

    Come to think of it, it was probably Fisher who cast the vote for Ward.

  28. Tony
    July 3, 2008 8:05 am

    Don’t read too much into Hines being on the list. Remember that it was 1 vote out of 32… That’s just one coach who is probably just sticking up for one of his corners that got decleated last season.