1. People, friends, Burghers, my loves, I have lots of emails to respond to (I’m looking at you, Goob, Tracy, Kathleen, DW, and maybe 400 more), and I’m going to get to them. Watch your email boxes.
2. OMG. Srsly. Matt Capps. Inventing new ways to blow saves. Can we give up on this guy for a bit? At least until he stops betting against the Buccos of Suckitude. What is that, four blown saves in a row? Luckily, it didn’t matter yesterday.
3. Okay, I have to ask. Yesterday I was watching the Buccos game and I think in the sixth inning, Jose Bautista goes up to bat, right after my next possible self-united husband Dougie put up a nice sacrifice fly, and Dougie is shown telling Jose what to expect pitch-wise from the particular pitcher on the mound.
He was intense and all, “Jose?! Jose! Come ‘ere. Listen. Fastball. Low in the center. Firm. Curve. Pirates of Montezuma. Then another fastball. Wait.” Then he goes over to the bench, gets this little black book and continues, “Okay. Here we go. Fastball. Inside low. Curve. Montezuma’s Revenge. Medusa’s Spit. Wait for your pitch. Go get ’em, boy.”
Here’s my question. Don’t they have coaches for this kind of thing? They weren’t kidding when they said Doug was bringing leadership to this team.
Also? They still suck. But this year, I’m having more fun watching the suck.
4. The fix is in re: those kids that made the duct tape prom clothes.
The competition operated on a “one vote per person per day” principle, allowing voters so inclined to cast up to seven votes per week. Ms. Dranko said the couple currently in first place gained more than 60,000 votes in a single day.
I smell shenanigans.
5. Now that we’ve tied up Geno/Gino (which is it?) for about six years, I guess I don’t need to worry about pulling him off of my blog banner anytime soon. Whew. That’s all I was worried about.
6. Rumor mill whispers, according to Mondesi’s House, are that PittGirl’s dream might come true. Did the Penguins offer a contract to Jaromir Jagr? Gosh. I hope so.
You guys, picture it. Sid, Geno, Hossa, Jagr. I’m getting tingly.
7. Hines Ward a “dirty” football player?! According to the NFL Coaches Poll he is among them:
Dallas Cowboys safety Roy Williams, notorious for horse-collar tackling, finished second in the coaches’ poll with two votes. Four players drew one vote apiece: New York Giants linebacker Antonio Pierce, Pittsburgh Steelers receiver Hines Ward, Tennessee Titans center Kevin Mawae and Chicago Bears center Olin Kreutz.
Really? Okay, football fanatics, please explain to me how Hines is a dirty player because I’m obviously biased and see no wrong in Hines Ward. Other than maybe in his business management skills.
8. Pittsburgh ranks 81 out of 100 in a listing of The Sweatiest Cities in America, based “on computer simulations of the amount of sweat an average person would have produced walking around in cities during the summer months last year.”
You can be a “half-full” person and say, “Hey! We’re not a very stinky people!”
Or you can be a “half-empty” person and say, “Yeah. That’s cause our summer weather sucks donkey omelets.”
9. The article that every man in America will be printing out and handing to his wife/girlfriend all, “There you go. Scientific, factual, cannot-be-disputed evidence that it’s good for you! I’m SAVING YOUR LIFE! You’re welcome.”
Be sure to take a look at that web address, though, ’cause I sure didn’t.
(h/t Capt. Dummy)