1. Monday. Night. Football!

Let’s hope the stretching cheerleaders don’t mess The Duke up too much.

2.  Hines Ward reportedly texted Ocho Cinco to ask him to tell Keith Rivers he’s sorry he broke his jaw, which by the way is broke in two places and will remain wired shut for another seven weeks.  Holy crap.

“Srry.  Srsly.” is what I imagine the text said.

Stay classy, Hines.

3.  Only 29% of sports fans and only 18% of the general population recognize the name and face of Sidney Crosby.

Really?!

He needs to start kicking sick puppies or something to get those numbers up.  Everybody remembers a guy who kicks sick puppies, am I right?

4.  Cooper Luke Ravenstahl and Paisios Polamalu (don’t call him pee-pee on the playground or his dad will tackle you) were born on Halloween.

5.  Troysus will play today.  Hallelujah for Paisios being so accommodating and getting himself born before the game.

6.  Tomorrow is voting day.  Vote Choke-a-Bitchocrat!

7.  Steely McBeam has his own children’s book called “Here We Go, Steelers!  Here We Go.”  I didn’t just make that up.

(h/t LB)

7.  Sonni Abatta as Britney Spears:

Don’t you boys ever say that I don’t do anything nice for you.  You can practically see a sliver of her inside boob there.

You’re welcome.

Lots more pictures here including Sally Wiggin as Medusa and Alison Morris as Sarah Palin.  UPDATE:  Warning.  That link will also cause you to see Big Bob dressed as Michael Phelps but it looks like he’s dressed as Michael Phelps if Michael Phelps’ crotch ate Troy Polamalu.   There you go.

(h/t Bob)

8.  An email:

Do you remember those goofy Halloween costumes in the 70’s where they gave you an inflatable thing, like a jackolantern or cat, and you tied them on your head?  I think they also gave you makeup and maybe a cape?  It is driving me crazy because I can’t remember what they were called.  You may be too young to remember, but I thought I would give it a shot.

Readers?

9.  The Mon Incline was not working over the weekend due to “computer issues.”

And by “computer issues” they mean “the monkeys that turn the wheels for free bananas both got sick, but they’re back at work today, thank God.”

Computer issues.  Right.  My stapler is more likely to get computer issues than the Mon Incline is.

Category: Ben Roethlisberger, Downtown happenings, Mayor Ravenstahl, Penguins, Sidney Crosby, Sonni Abatta, Steelers, Troy Polamalu | tags: Luke Ravenstahl, Pittsburgh Penguins, Sonni Abatta, Steelers, Troy Polamalu | November 3, 2008 | | ShareThis