Hold still. This’ll only hurt a hell of a lot.

ERIE, Pa. — Officials at Presque Isle State Park say dead gulls and loons are proof that avian botulism continues to be a problem for Great Lakes shore birds.

The staff found nearly 60 dead birds at the park since Friday, including nine dead loons yesterday.

Avian botulism paralyzes the birds’ muscles, killing them.

Just a note.  That hot chick kneeling on Fifth Avenue, holding a pigeon down by the face and injecting it with botulism from Lake Erie?

Totally not me.

Mwah-hahahah!





13 Comments

  1. unsatisfied
    November 6, 2008 12:05 pm

    I was in presque isle state park this past weekend.

    coinkydink?

    I think not.



  2. pittgirl
    November 6, 2008 12:05 pm

    My hero.



  3. Thee Dude
    November 6, 2008 12:43 pm

    Not to be outdone by the Unsatisfied Superhero, I shall be heading up there as well tomorrow.
    Mwah-hahahah!



  4. spoon
    November 6, 2008 12:44 pm

    Woy did it. I haven’t been home in over a month.



  5. the violet
    November 6, 2008 1:21 pm

    I was watching this movie last night, “Twenty Four Hour Party People” and let’s just say there’s a scene in it involving pigeons that I think you’d enjoy. Whenever I saw it I immediatley thought of you. How endearing.



  6. Foghorn Tom
    November 6, 2008 2:14 pm

    Ralph?

    You misspelled Fritz

    I fixed it for ya :)



  7. unsatisfied
    November 6, 2008 3:22 pm

    PG,

    just all in a day’s work, ma’am — no thanks necessary. though, if you’d ever like to send along a personal pic wearing nothing but a terrible towel, your favorite do-me boots and a smile — why, I’d be much obliged.

    thee dude,

    I trust thee to carry on proudly with this fine work.



  8. Mrs. Pitsberger
    November 6, 2008 3:46 pm

    PG, I love that people hit on you having absolutely no idea what you look like.



  9. Sexy Jesus
    November 6, 2008 4:20 pm

    I firmly believe PG looks like Ken Rice. Makes unsatisfied’s request/fantasy both hilarious and nauseating, but it helps pass the time at work.



  10. unsatisfied
    November 6, 2008 11:48 pm

    hey, with eyebrows like that, who would I be to complain? they’re effin’ hawt.



  11. Thee Dude
    November 7, 2008 7:21 am

    Mrs. Pitsberger, personality can be a turn-on, no?

    Unsatisfied, you might need a case of Zima to sweeten the deal.



  12. john
    November 7, 2008 10:00 am

    I am sorry…you lost me at “hot chick kneeling on 5th ave”…..



  13. bucdaddy
    November 8, 2008 8:43 pm

    PG could look like Sea Hag + Alice the Goon for all I care, she’d still be hawt.

    1. Sense of humor.

    2. Generally positive attitude.

    3. Sense of humor.

    4. Self-confidence.

    5. Sense of humor.

    6. Do-me boots.

    7. Sense of humor.

    8. Sports fan.

    9. Sense of humor.

    10. Funny family.

    Zima is the only potential deal-breaker I see, but it’s gone now, so … I can learn to love country (I’m already partway there, thanks to DBTs) if she can learn to love good beer.