Random n’at


(Via Trib)

1. A conversation that just happened with my sister Tammy/Pens Fan who came over for lunch:

Tammy: Did you watch Dancing with the Stars last night?

Me: No. I was occupied with Chris Hummina Hummina O’Donnell.

Tammy: Chris O’Donnell?!  What’s he on?


Tammy: Meh.

Me: Meh?! No meh. He’s hot.

Tammy: Whatever. Anyway, I watched Dancing with the Stars last night and can I just tell you how much I love —

Me: Please don’t say Tom DeLay.

Tammy: Yeah, I was going to say Tom DeLay. Tom DeLay is SO HAWT.

Me: Hummina hummina.

Tammy: No. Kelly Osbourne. She made me cry.

Which is odd, because the only way I would ever imagine Kelly Osbourne being able to make me cry is if she punches my face in.  Might have to tune in for myself to see what she’s talking about.

2.  Did you guys see the Greenpeace lame-butts that dangled themselves from the West End bridge today?

Did you see them and their big sign complaining that carbon dioxide emissions are destroying the environment?

Did you see how their stunt backed up traffic like a mother?

Did you see all the cars forced to idle, thus emitting smoke and chemicals and environment-destroying carbon dioxide into the air?  And the boats that had to come and monitor their dumb butts, also emitting smoke and chemicals and environment-destroying carbon dioxide into the air?

Did you see me giving a nice, slow golf-clap for these doofi for causing the very thing they’re protesting?

BRAVO!  Encore!

I think I’ll go protest the destruction of our rivers by dumping a couple gallons of botulism into the Mon.  Come down and clap for me.

3.  Do you wish you had a hand-crafted beer tap for your next Steelers party and do you wish it looked like Troy Polamalu if God formed Troy Polamalu out of a giant brown turd, gave him dreads, and a face that looks just like Nic Cage if Nic Cage was majorly fug?

Do you also wish you had a beer tap that resembles Ben Roethlisberger if Ben Roethlisberger was a 75-year-old leper?

Do you wish to pay $75 for each one of them?

Wish granted.

(h/t Valerie)

4. Here’s a fun article that says the White House press corps laughed when Pittsburgh was announced as host of the G-20.  The article also says G-20 host cities don’t see any economic benefit from hosting the event.


(h/t @JerryBigley)

5.  Just like that, my PG+ (pronounced peh-jay po-see-tiff in French) one year subscription paid for itself via free tickets to the opening night of Cirque du Soleil on October 7.  Anyone else going to be there?

6.  I am a little surprised at how much this Craigslist What the Effie made me laugh:


(h/t Valerie)

7.  Here’s another.  You don’t get to tell us you’re smart when you can’t spell “etc.”

Also, “I am a well respected member of my tribe. I know people (but not in a dangerous way). I live in my parents basement (I’m saving $$$).”


8.  Finally, because “classy, educated women” ALWAYS respond to ads seeking a “down ass bitch.”


  1. Jtown
    September 23, 2009 2:23 pm

    I love the craigslist ad from the wife trying to find her husband a Rusty Trombone…


  2. Bonnie
    September 23, 2009 2:29 pm

    I’ll be there opening night too!

  3. Capt. Dummy
    September 23, 2009 2:32 pm

    the polamalu beer tap looks exactly like the protestor that was kicked out of lawrenceville the other day!!!

    this tool:

  4. chrys
    September 23, 2009 2:41 pm

    About th e Green Peace protesters dangling over the West End Bridge.. that was commitment to their “cause”. Maybe their stunt wasn’t fully thought out, but damnit! They were committed. LMAO!!!!! I’ll say this.. hanging over a river isn’t for me.. I prefer flash mobs!! :)

  5. Jake
    September 23, 2009 2:47 pm

    Re #2 – There will be a follow-up memo decrying the unwarranted police action that caused so many unnecessary pollutants to be pumped into the atmosphere.

    I think the strategy is in an activism manual somewhere…

  6. Ant_041
    September 23, 2009 2:52 pm

    LMAO I am so glad it is rain hard out side for those clowns on the bridge. Mayor Luke should tell the police officers to head over there with a pare of bolt cutters and yell down. “Hey come on up. Maybe I give the first person 3 changes to respond before they make them take a bath in the river. The next couple of People should get the hint. What do you think??

  7. Bojack
    September 23, 2009 2:56 pm

    Well duhhhhhhh!!!!!!

    Our star-struck elected village supreme idiots need to be UN-elected ASAP for this heinous fiasco!!!!

    What Ginny said: fukc the city “self esteem” issues!!! Who still has them???


    Q.E.D. WE ARE IDIOTS!!!!!!!!!!

    FUKC the G20, give me the essential winter city services which
    we won’t have this year such as snow removal, enough road salt, etc!!!

    YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST!! Better upgrade to 4WD and chains!!

    FUKC the G20!!!

    How about funding the city pools??????????????
    The parks?????????

    I live next to a pool that gets closed early because of all those expensive lifeguards we can’t afford!!!

    I stare out my window at 4 tenis courts that are unusable because we can’t afford those expensive nets…



    from Yahoo News today-

    …. With fewer than 4,000 people expected to attend the Pittsburgh summit, experts say the local economy should see a boost of only about $8 million. And while the U.S. government is covering many of the city’s costs, the Pittsburgh city council had to temporarily shift $16 million in funding to cover outlays that they say will be reimbursed eventually.


  8. Different Brian
    September 23, 2009 3:02 pm

    Its a shame they didnt just cut the cables of those people who were dangling off the bridge. WHOOPS. Sorry I was walking with my scissor shoes and didnt see your cables there. My bad.

  9. Valerie
    September 23, 2009 3:06 pm

    Two credits in one post. I lurve you! ;)

  10. gunnlino
    September 23, 2009 3:10 pm

    BOJACK>>>>>Switch to decaf buddy.

  11. butcher's dog
    September 23, 2009 3:18 pm

    Lost in the Greenpeace/G20 hysteria: Cirque du Soleil. Those people are, by far, the most amazing athletes in the world. Balance, flexibility, strength, skills, explosive power, grace, body control…you name the quality and they all have it in spades. Enjoy, Ginny and others. They amaze with what the human body is capable of.

    Others, of course, amaze with what the human mind is capable of. Or capable of missing.

  12. PittinDC
    September 23, 2009 3:18 pm

    So, here’s my question. Do you think that those beer taps were made so fugly on purpose? The seller is from Baltimore.

  13. AZNBurgher
    September 23, 2009 3:18 pm

    well the stunt was at least non violent, looking at the bright side here.

  14. Matt
    September 23, 2009 3:32 pm

    Craigslist “Bed thing that you put unber the mattres so your child don’t fall out”. I had trouble figuring this out until I saw that it was posted from Acme PA, where I’ve visited and studied the local dialect. Here in most of the eastern states we refer to this as “the floor”.

  15. Lea
    September 23, 2009 3:39 pm

    I saw that craigslist listing yesterday, and I immediately thought of Ginny, and lo and behold, here it is. It made me chuckle.

  16. Pgh'r
    September 23, 2009 3:47 pm

    I also won tickets to Cirque du Soleil from PG+. Very exciting.

  17. Magus Patris
    September 23, 2009 3:53 pm

    Regarding item 7, Here’s another. Don’t worry douchebag, no fat girl would be stupid enough to go out with you.

    Also, is that Greenpeace banner made of recycled materials and printed with soy ink? I thought not. Wonder how many baby seals or whale foreskins it took to make it.

  18. Bram R
    September 23, 2009 3:58 pm

    1. Wowee zowee, when I saw that image all big up top I honestly thought I’d stumbled on to the Drudge Report for a second!

    1. “Dumb butts?” You’re killin’ me, Montanez! This is like complaining that someone who values staying in shape also likes some ice cream now and again. They keep at it, when emissions caps actually DO finally arrive it’ll take about .05 weeks to offset the carbon footprint of every bridge-based flash-rappel mob they’ve ever organized. Summarily, just be thankful Greenpeace didn’t bring its fleet and isn’t throwing flower and jam on any of our commercial whaling vessels. Anyone watch that reality show?

  19. Pensgirl
    September 23, 2009 4:00 pm

    3. GAAAH! Also, Nic Cage is not already fug?

    4. The WH press corps is a bunch of elitist snobs who look down on everything and everyone else (a common problem with DC assholes). Pay no attention to them.

    6. My favorite part has to be “unber.”

    7. Especially when the ad is by an admitted asshole. I bet his inbox is FULL.

  20. Sooska
    September 23, 2009 4:31 pm

    3. you pay $75 (or $150 for custom) a papier-mache beer tap? then accidently drop it some water or other liquid and it turns to slime? kidding, right? have your kids make you one for $2.25. you could do a favorite Steeler or Penguin per week for less than the price of shipping and handling.

    6,7,8: I pity the fool – Mr T.

  21. Magus Patris
    September 23, 2009 4:43 pm

    Greenpeace just put up a new banner on the West End Bridge. Spokesman says they feel for long suffering Pittsburghers. http://twitpic.com/iuzb5

  22. Three
    September 23, 2009 4:55 pm

    Magus Patris, that is awesome.

    And you know, if the Polamalu beer taps don’t sell, I bet it’s an easy conversion to make it a Klingon and sell it as Worf at the next sci-fi convention.

  23. Summer
    September 23, 2009 5:33 pm

    Just watched a news piece on demonstrators coming here and they’re all, “well, we don’t CONDONE violence, but it certainly gets you noticed and maybe the media will listen to some of the issues” and “Well, we don’t WANT anything to happen, but it MIGHT. We’ll see what the fallout is for Pittsburgh.”

    These are not reassuring words, people.

    Again, if you want to PEACEFULLY talk about an issue, I would gladly discuss it with you. I have been poor and uninsured in my lifetime, and I feel for others who are still there.

    However, don’t come in, cause some shit and then shrug and go, “Aw, shucks, we didn’t mean it to turn out like this!” *winkwink*

    Bullshit. Bullshit. Bullshit.

    No riots. No violence. No attacking the residents/business people of Pittsburgh because of something they can’t control.

    If the police tell you to move somewhere, don’t be a douche and spit on, throw something at or strike an officer who has a gun, a baton and a taser and who, once you start some shit, may use them on you. Don’t start something with the police, then cry police brutality. That’s just stupid and diminishes the experiences of those who have suffered true police brutality.

    Respect our city. Obey our officers of the law. Protest peacefully. And you will be welcome.

  24. Kevin in ABQ
    September 23, 2009 5:59 pm

    What is a Bedrail, Alex?

  25. April
    September 23, 2009 7:14 pm

    Please Ginny, PLEASE come up with a G20 drinking game tomorrow for all of us who are “working from home”.

  26. Beth P
    September 23, 2009 7:31 pm

    Okay, the Polamalu tap is seriously ugly. But I may have to begrudgingly respect the person who would willingly and happily have a John Waters beer tap at their home bar.

  27. Chris T
    September 23, 2009 8:27 pm

    #7: “I’m pretty smart and can talk about books, movies, religon and politicts.” Maybe he can talk politicts with Lukey.

  28. 7000th Nerd Girl
    September 24, 2009 6:28 am

    My favorite part of #8 is “edcuated”. Ed-cuuu-aayyyyyted. At least he wasn’t claiming to be “edcuated” himself, I guess.

  29. Bojack
    September 24, 2009 7:53 am


    Thnx, but decaf is like NA beer to me, like kissing your sister! :-)

    It just blows me away!!

    When did we forget these hacks WORK FOR US????


    The press corps wasn’t laughing at the choice of Pittsburgh because the city isn’t pretty, or doesn’t have world-class universities and cultural events; they are laughing, as they should, because WE are MORONS to ALLOW OUR ELECTED MORONS (Lukey and Danny) TO SHOVE THIS $$$ LOSER

    Did you know?-
    Pittsburgh is the only city in “receivership” to host the G20?

    <PS- I find it hilarious that the G20 "Committee" gave the delegates Pirate's swag in their welcome baskets! NOT Steelers' or Pen's swag, just loser's swag!! LOL

    September 24, 2009 9:17 am

    #3 You do realize if these are legit nfl licensed items, he paid a lot of money to create these. $10,000 maybe.

    I, unfortunately, no longer live in Pittsburgh.
    I would like to see Pittsburghers stand along the outside of the protest areas in their Steeler shirts etc., with a terrible towel in there hand.

    Block those protesters Steeler defense style.


  31. Chelly
    September 24, 2009 9:59 am

    …the John Waters tap was oddly lifelike…

  32. justagirl
    September 24, 2009 10:46 am

    1. Eh. If Greenpeace protesters want to hang a banner and hang out over the river for several hours, I figure that’s mostly their problem. It was peaceful, they came back up, and they’ll face charges. The more people talk about it, the more effective they’ll think it’s been.

    2. I wouldn’t trust anything from Acme, even a bedrail. I’ve seen those things Wyle E. Coyote is always trying to use to catch the Roadrunner. They’re all from ACME too! There are probably jet rockets in that there bedrail.

  33. bluzdude
    September 24, 2009 11:07 am

    I can understand the John Waters tap handle. He’s a counter-culture deity here in Baltimore.

  34. Der Burghermeister
    September 24, 2009 12:17 pm

    4. Can we stop trying to assess the goodness and value of something like the G-20 Summit being in Pittsburgh like a 5-year old on Christmas morning? If it’s not great NOW it’s worthless, right? Even financially strapped businesses (cities) still need to sell and market themselves or risk becoming obsolete (irrelevant). It’s not about insecurity, to the contrary,it’s about confidence we belong on this stage. Dan & Luke, love ’em or hate ’em, are working press from around the world HARD at the moment on the reasons to be in Pittsburgh. What an opportunity, and we’re wondering here whether a few extra burgers got flipped…argh!

  35. facie
    September 24, 2009 12:29 pm

    The Greenpeace thing reminded me of the time I was behind a Prius and watched the driver throw a cigarette butt out the window. I realize I cannot assume that just because one drives a car that is better for the environment one actually cares about the environment. But that is not exactly a far-reaching assumption. Maybe the driver was just stupid.

  36. Jillian
    September 24, 2009 12:50 pm

    I don’t care what Kelly Osborne is doing…she is never going to draw my attention away from Chris and LL. Never-no-Never.

  37. peeeeeegen
    September 24, 2009 12:55 pm

    Let’s not forget about the pigeons.
    The atomic bomb that was dropped on Nagasaki wiped out a rare species of pigeon found nowhere else in the world.

  38. Annie
    September 24, 2009 1:43 pm

    I’m not saying that I agree with Greenpeace’s tactics, but I think you’re a little harsh on this particular stunt. In their opinion, to reverse global warming we need bold action from world leaders (I agree with them on this point). They’d argue that making a some cars idle is minuscule compared to the impact that could be made from potential policy enacted by these world leaders. I would just question the amount of impact the sign would actually have on world leaders.

    Also, I’m usually skeptical of politicians who promise revenue from hosting huge events, like the G-20, the World Cup, the Olympics, etc. Usually it justs puts these cities into a big hole. However, I’m going to hold off my criticism until I see if Rendell or Mayor Luke can parlay this event into anything. If we can convince some business leaders that Pittsburgh is an inexpensive and livalbe city that they should invest in, that would certainly make up the difference.

    DC a-hole (according to fellow commenter) originally from western PA.

  39. Linda
    September 25, 2009 1:10 am

    So the White House press corps laughed when they learned the G20 was coming to Pittsburgh? When those bozos learn to cover what the president (of either party) is up to as well as Steeler press corps covers Tomlin and the team, then they will have earned the right to laugh at a town that isn’t full of lying, cheating, scheming, crooked hypocritical scumbag fools like themselves. In other words, that isn’t Washington.

  40. bethkriz
    September 25, 2009 4:28 am

    Someone should point the protesters toward Heinz Field. I mean, it’s named for one of the biggest companies in the world and the team which plays there is owned by rich white dudes…

    I onlt suggest this because I know that the good folks of da ‘Burgh wouldn’t stand for this and we’d see tens of thousands of people flocking to the North Side in a spontaneous mob to run the protesters out of the city, once and for all.

    Don’t mess with Stillers fans, yinz!

  41. JennyMoon
    September 25, 2009 12:17 pm

    Can someone please run down to these protests or rallies or whatever the heck they are and start the “Here we go Steelers” chant. Thanks!

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