Random n’at

1.  Four days until my December column is due and I’m still without topic.  So I took to my personal facebook and as usual Tina Fey/Marcia is a GIANT GIANT HELP.


I give up. I think I’m just going to write the word “bowl” 800 times.  Major cool points to you if you know to what TV show I’m referring.


Also, no, you are not allowed to call me “Gingersnap” unless you want me to start calling you “that reader I had to punch.”

2.  People, I promise you I am not being paid one little peso or cent to say this, but why the crap aren’t you a PG+ (pronounced pee gee poseeteevo in Italian) member yet?  Remember how I already won tickets to the opening of Cirque du Soleil thanks to PG+ Perks?  Guess what? My latest perk is that I won a family four pack of tickets to see an advance screening of WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE!

Now that I’ve said this, I realize that the more of you that join PG+ the smaller my future chances of winning prizes is going to be, so I would like to strike today’s Random n’at #2 from the record and pretend like I never wrote it.

Don’t join PG+.  Dumbest newspaper online content ever.  Stay the heck away from PG+.

3.  Reader Lisa accidentally typed www.thatchurch.com last week and this was the video showing on the home page.    Major cheese = major LOLZ.

4.  Um, I know what you’re thinking and no, this is not a Super Bowl Hand Crocheted Super Tampon for your Super Flow Days (tm Rhonda).  This is a Steelers Crocheted Willy Warmer “for the Steelers fan in your life.”


Two million dollars says we eventually see a camera-phone bathroom mirror picture making rounds of either Jeff Reed or The Asshat sporting one of these puppies.

Also, you haven’t laughed until you’ve read this on an etsy seller’s product description:

Here is a unique water bottle holder. I’ve added a vagina to it.

Seriously, go check it out. It’s fantastically hideous.  I think for Christmas I’m going to learn how to crochet scarves and then when I hand them out, I’ll say, “Here is a scarf for you.  I’ve added a couple of boobs to it.  You’re welcome.”

(h/t Jenn, who I gotta wonder what she was searching for when she stumbled across this)

5.  A few What the Effies:

6.  If you missed it, and yes I did miss it because, well, I’m sorry, I hate professional wrestling because it’s … I’m going to say it, okay … okay … here I go … FAKE.  And I realize it’s supposed to be like a soap opera or something, but, you know, I have just never understood the appeal.  Anyway, here’s Ben being schmucky on Raw last night along with members of the Steelers D and uh, that’s all I’m going to say about this because if I say what I really want to say it will have a lot of [eyeroll] in it:

YouTube Preview Image



  1. Lea
    October 6, 2009 11:31 am

    Love How I Met Your Mother. I heart Barney. (He’s my secret boyfriend that my husband doesn’t know about!)

  2. Pensgirl
    October 6, 2009 11:40 am

    As for a topic for your December column, how about and end-of-year recap that has a couple of sentences about all of the things you didn’t get to blog about as they happened? There were a shit-ton of things that happened this year that made your loyal readers wish you were around to talk about it. From the sports celebrations to those policemen who were ambushed and murdered, it was a very eventful year in the ‘burgh, and we spent a lot of it without you. So write a little of what you wanted to write when those things happened.

    (On the celebs, I just want to note that Christina Aguilera came back in 2005 to sing the anthem at the Pens’ opening game, which was a nice “thank you” to them for letting her sing it for games as a kid.)

  3. L-A
    October 6, 2009 11:40 am

    It’s the Steelers O, not D, silly! :-) Thanks for the post – good stuff as usual!

  4. Jenn
    October 6, 2009 11:49 am

    I just searched Etsy for “Steelers” and that’s what came up! I was dying over the vagina water bottle holders too (complete with pubes!).

  5. Stacey
    October 6, 2009 11:52 am

    BOWL, BOWL, BOWL, BOWL… ah ha ha. That was a great episode last night.

  6. Linda Jordan Platt
    October 6, 2009 12:34 pm

    What Pensgirl said. It would give you a chance to write about some things that happened in between blogs…Jack Wilson, Freddie Sanchez, where the Stanley Cup has been, etc.

  7. John in the Rocks
    October 6, 2009 12:54 pm

    I’m a wrestling fan, so I got a big kick out of seeing The Duke and the O-Line on RAW last night, even if it was one of the most surreal things I’ve ever seen.

  8. Amy M
    October 6, 2009 12:57 pm

    I feel obligated to watch HIMYM since it is one of the few (only) TV shows today that includes an architect in the cast…even if said architect is the least interesting character on the show. That, and my love for Neil Patrick Harris. Best Emmy MC in ages and ages.

    Feeling nostalgic for the days of Elyse Keaton…

  9. Scott
    October 6, 2009 1:14 pm

    Call me soft, but I feel a little sorry for the Facebook “Shrek”….

  10. Dave in Pgh.
    October 6, 2009 1:42 pm

    “mucho suckio” “need helpio”

    Cool! I can learn Spanish by reading That’s Church. Maybe next summer if I go to LA I can speak to my Mexican sister-in-law in Spanish. I mean, in the Virginia dialect of Spanish.

  11. bluzdude
    October 6, 2009 1:42 pm

    Awww, I thought “Gingersnap” was adorable.

    My dad actually has one of those black and gold willy warmers… he uses it as a Christmas ornament. Every year he puts it square smack in the front of the tree. Then mom surreptitiously moves it around to the back.

    I “third” Pensgirl’s idea. Alternately, you can write an rave review of Las Velas’ opening!

  12. Shannon Davis
    October 6, 2009 1:52 pm

    Love the Duke and the O-Line, but was the crotch x-ing really necessary?

  13. Jara
    October 6, 2009 2:00 pm

    All I can say is that I never knew that wrestling now included line dancing. It’s appropriate.

  14. Michelle
    October 6, 2009 2:14 pm

    Well as someone who watches professional wrestling on a semi-normal basis (yeah I know, shocker, a girl watches the WWE)…Ben (and the Steelers offense) was one of the better guest hosts that Raw has had. I know it’s cheesy, but that’s half…okay, more than half…of the point. I call it the soap opera for men. Once I figured that out, it made it much easier to watch. :P Anyway, like I was saying, I actually liked when they went out and hung with DX (a tag team whose appeal is that they’re crazy and funny and very non-professional). To me, it seemed like they were enjoying themselves (which rarely happens with said guests hosts)…and it was nice to get to see two things that I like (Steelers and wrestling) on the same thing! :P

  15. steel city windy city
    October 6, 2009 2:23 pm

    #6> I promised myself I wouldn’t watch. Damn broken promise. ooof, stick to football, ben and o-line. although it was funny when the “little” guy in the suit called out ‘turf toe’ as being for the not so tough. guess fast willie won’t be doing any guest hosting on wwe raw.

  16. RIZZO
    October 6, 2009 2:29 pm

    I love How I Met Your Mother! I also thing that Gingersnap is a snappy little nickname. Very cute.

  17. Monty
    October 6, 2009 2:54 pm

    Bluzdude — I may be misreading your post, but, if not, your mom is going to be pretty embarrassed that you just shared that with everyone. Kudos to her for still keeping things interesting once a year though!

  18. bucdaddy
    October 6, 2009 3:14 pm

    I need to know if No. 4 comes in extra large.

  19. Kristie
    October 6, 2009 3:28 pm

    LOL @ the tags on the Willy Warmer Etsy page – crochet, sack, peter, pittsburgh, steelers, football

  20. kelli
    October 6, 2009 3:35 pm

    Am I the only one who found the cheesy video funny. Yes, I thought it was cheesy too, but cheesy can be funny.

    “It gone done kilt my daddy”

    “His momma kilt his daddy. With a skillet.”

    Also, Scott – I see where you are coming from and am with you. Not nearly as effie as the others, not really effie at all.

  21. justagirl
    October 6, 2009 4:17 pm

    I think Moon Twp Shrek came off well, actually. That was a nice write-up, and the picture is cute (and Shrek-like. And who doesn’t like Shrek?)

    I made it through 55 seconds of the WWE video. That’s pretty good for me! I love watching sports. I can’t stand to watch the bastard child of sports and soap operas, complete with bad acting, silly costumes, and outrageous amounts of machismo.

  22. Virginia
    October 6, 2009 4:47 pm

    Oh, I wasn’t saying there was anything bad about the man’s post, just that with socks on his ears, he looks like Shrek. That was all. Not an insult at all. Because as justagirl said, who doesn’t like Shrek?

  23. Russell Dunkin
    October 6, 2009 5:36 pm

    Can’t beat a HIMYM reference!

  24. Steeler_tom
    October 6, 2009 5:38 pm

    IF I had a single sister, I’d try to send her the the Shrek man. It sounds like he’s got a good heart.

  25. Trixie
    October 6, 2009 5:42 pm

    Libraries. Write about libraries.

  26. Sofa King
    October 6, 2009 6:06 pm

    I could’ve used a #4 at the Cowboys game last year. Brutally cold up in the nosebleeds.

  27. Still A, Fan
    October 6, 2009 7:16 pm

    re: FOR THOSE THAT BLEED BLACK-N-GOLD, lets try a selling line for that thingy

    “Watch the love for your team grow”

    “For growing Team Pride”

    “Hi, I am Limas Sweed’s Jacket”

  28. Jen
    October 6, 2009 7:46 pm

    BOWWL! I love Ted Mosby.

  29. PittCheMBA
    October 6, 2009 9:28 pm

    For your December column (or even just a blog post), you could write about everything that went wrong with the Pirates this year. Part of the problem is where to start. There is just too much material to work with here. I was hoping for 100 loses this year, but they managed to screw it up and only lose 99 games.

  30. unsatisfied
    October 7, 2009 6:51 am

    she could write about the succos, PittCheMBA.

    but, my edumacated guess is that she wants to write something that people actually might want to read….

  31. L-A
    October 7, 2009 7:07 am

    How about all the movies that are being filmed in da Burgh recently and the hotness (see: Gyllenhall) that ensues? Perhaps you can stalk Jakey for the next couple days, posing as a Paparazzo (paparazza???).

  32. Stacey
    October 7, 2009 7:12 am

    I was just thinking to myself that the movie industry in Pittsburgh would be a good topic. Maybe even throw in the TV stuff too (Three Rivers)…

  33. butcher's dog
    October 7, 2009 7:50 am

    The sucks not losing 100 gets an asterisk because one got rained out and they only played 161. Just sayin’.

    While year-end columns usually consist of “last time when” stuff, perhaps Ginny could use her crystal ball and rapier wit to write a “next time when” for December. You know, like predicting the next time when the sucks will post a winning season, next time when the Pens hoist the Cup, next time when G-20 comes back to town. The possibilities are endless and span the Pittsburgh spectrum. Think sports, politics, potholes, parking.

    No need to thank me.

  34. mfj
    October 7, 2009 10:42 am

    Way to go with that mother/son What the Effie. Right when my stomach was finally de-queased from the tampon post.