THANK YOU, CITY PAPER!

I heard this rumor, but no one printed it, and since it was hearsay on my part, I didn’t print it but City Paper has the balls, the cojones, the donkey omelets of steel to print what I couldn’t believe I heard:

“Off the Record” gives local officials rebuttal time as “guest humorists.” And according to several witnesses who contacted us after the fact, Ravenstahl used his moment on stage to send a message to ACLU state legal director Vic Walczak, who has sharply criticized the city’s handling of G-20 protesters. According to multiple sources, Ravenstahl said something like this: “I heard we’re going to face a free-speech lawsuit. Well, I have some free speech for you — fuck you, Vic Walczak.”

The way I was told it, the very afternoon after he did it, was that Lukey, dressed in riot gear, said, “I got your free speech right here [flip the double bird and sort of motion toward crotch in that Snoop Dogg style] — FUCK YOOOOOOOOUUUUU, Vic.”   That’s what I was told.

Er, sorry I just said “fuck” but I’m probably going to have to say it again at some point in this post, so brace yourself, Daddy.

My view is this, Lukey went too far.  Actually, he didn’t just go too far, he saw the line, laughed at the line, erased the line, then got in his spaceship and zoomed to the planet Visuviusium six galaxies away and then kept the hell on going like a fleet of starfighters was on his ass.  THAT’S how far he went.

There’s a time for a politician to joke around, hell, maybe there’s a time for a politician to be all “FUCK YOU!” but in front of an audience of voters who merely had to shell out a few bucks to be in attendance, and during election time to boot… is not that time.

His spokesperson, the talented Joanna Doven said:

“The mayor was pleased to be a guest humorist. He enjoyed himself,” said mayoral spokesperson Joanna Doven. “It raised more than $30,000 for the Food Bank.”

Oh! It was for CHARITY! Okay, the event I’m going to tonight is for charity, so please, come to the bar at the Glass Center and I’ll be all, “Welcome! I’ve got your drink right here. FUCK YOUUUUUUU!”

I’m such a philanthropist.





61 Comments


  1. USCMike
    October 19, 2009 6:20 am

    Can’t we please get off our high horses and get back to the true focus of this post, concerning our politicians and placekickers being drunk in public (and one of them was cited again last night for public drunkeness and it wasn’t Lukey)!

    Oh Skippy, you need to go out and drink in the boonies where you can go hide at the local Sheetz…



  2. Gina
    October 19, 2009 6:46 am

    Ok, we get it – you don’t like the Mayor. Can you get back to the standard humorous posts of the old days and stop with political opinion pieces? Thanks.



  3. Virginia
    October 19, 2009 7:44 am

    Gina, I’m sorry, how much are you paying me to write what you’re reading and what blog have you been reading for these years? I’ve always been critical of the Mayor. This is not something new that I just started doing. Second, since I returned to blogging I have been critical of the Mayor exactly THREE times in 80 posts. If you don’t like it when I talk politics you can either bloop bloop bloop on down or you can stop reading the blog. THANKS.



  4. Summer
    October 19, 2009 8:02 am

    It’s not about whether he has the right to say something stupid, it’s about whether it’s appropriate for a public figure and representative of the city to say something stupid.

    Two completely different issues.

    And we haven’t had a Lukey post in a good long while. They’re an intergal part of the blog — hello, drinking game? — and I missed them.



  5. Bram R
    October 19, 2009 9:35 am

    Shorter PG Wodehouse @Ravishing Rick – Just because the Constitution guarantees someone the right to be an ass, doesn’t mean they ought to just rush out the door and be one.

    @PG Wodehouse – I still challenge the assumption that any attempts at “humor”, edgy or otherwise, were made. Until someone identifies a joke, pun, or self-depreciating allusion to me, what happened was a guy dressing up like a spaceman and yelling “Fuck you!” to some people that were criticizing him…

    … because he was playing like a little dictator in Oakland since he could get away with it during the G20.

    @Gina – I don’t like the pigeon posts, but you never hear me complain. Something for everyone, that’s the That’s Church promise!



  6. PG Wodehouse
    October 19, 2009 10:17 am

    Sorry, Bram, I guess Ravishing Rick inspired to me to such heights of verbosity and I felt he was due for a “Rude Awakening.”

    Also, when the article starts off with a reference to satiric guest humorist, I will give people the benefit of the doubt and assume they are attempting to be funny.

    Satire is one of the trickier forms of social commentary. People point to the satiric genius of Jonathon Swift’s “A Modest Proposal” though I don’t recollect any humor in his solving hunger among the poor be feeding them babies. Often the role of satire is to zoom past the line to make a point. South Park is an excellent example of this. When they get it right it can be riotously funny. When they get it wrong, it comes off as heavy handed and mean-spirited. Likewise, many comedians point to the Andy Kaufman-Jerry Lawler feud from the 80′s as an example of Kaufman’s comedic genius. Others of us just scratch our heads and settle in for some good Mommy Mommy jokes.

    Geez, maybe I’m just verbose.



  7. PG Wodehouse
    October 19, 2009 10:30 am

    To look at it another way, would it have been funny if it had been a Saturday Night Live skit with someone else playing the role of the mayor? What if someone else wrote the skit and Mayor Ravenstahl just performed it? The problem for the mayor is that people assume that he both wrote and performed the material and that it reflects his true feelings about the issue which may or may not be the case.

    Living in the Philadelphia, I don’t get much Mayor Ravenstahl news and what I do get comes mostly for this blog which has a decidedly negative view of him.



  8. Bram R
    October 19, 2009 1:46 pm

    @PWode- Go ahead and check all the other blogs. And then all the newspapers.



  9. Gina
    October 19, 2009 5:27 pm

    Keep stretching, Ginny. Minute 17 is RIGHT within your reach!



  10. SpudMom
    October 19, 2009 6:51 pm

    Wow, Gina. If you’ve got that much of a problem, find another blog. Dang.



  11. Sofa King
    October 22, 2009 5:42 am

    The fact that the purpose of the event was to let politicians act as “humorists” leads me to believe that the folks in the audience would be prepared for a little outrageousness, so this was the perfect forum to let out a big “Fuck you.”

    Personally, I prefer politicians that aren’t afraid to let loose every now and then…all politicians are trained in the art of bullshit p.c. double-speak, so I think it’s refreshing when one’s not afraid to step outside the lines a bit.