1. Here’s a homemaking tip. Don’t get a shot glass stuck in your garbage disposal. It will break the shot glass and no matter how much of the glass you pull out with some $13 kitchen tongs, your garbage disposal will be destroyed.
I am the next Martha Stewart.
Also, honey, please buy a new garbage disposal on your way home.
Srsly and KTHXBAI.
2. Yesterday while reading the newspaper, I said aloud, “Oh, that’s screwed up. Srsly [pronounced surs-lee].”
And my son said, “Mom. What does ‘srsly’ mean?”
Whoops. Got to stop the silly talk around the kid lest he go to school all, “And I was all, ‘I mean srsly, you suck and that’s church. And DRINK! KTXHBAI.’ ”
3. Know what’s sad? Sending an email to a nonprofit saying, “I want to raise $10,000 for you so that you can give sick kids a gameroom,” and then not getting a reply back after two weeks. On to plan Z to get the kids a gameroom.
4. Speaking of kids, Burgh Baby is raising Christmas Crazy over at her site. I gave and if you have a dollar or two to give so that she can buy toys for needy kids, please do.
5. Speaking of kids, Lukey (hee) was selected by Time Magazine to be on a panel with people like Barbara Walters and Oprah’s Best Friend Gayle and Rudy Giuliani to select Time’s Person of the Year for 2009.
I bet he nominates Ben Roethlisberger. Or Superman.
6. So many of you have emailed, tweeted, or facebooked me asking if I’ve seen Pigeon: Impossible, and I have and I can’t even express to you how amazing it is. Especially the last few seconds.
I won’t ruin the ending for you other than to say KABLOOEY!
Take a look.
7. The lower bar level of Las Velas will be opening for the first time on Light Up Night, November 20. It will be a margarita bar with food offerings as well. It is around the corner from the main Las Velas entrance and will be open until late night most nights. Light Up Night is going to be a great night for Las Velas, as is November 28 when we’re holding a big after-Thanksgiving celebration complete with mariachis. Join us for dinner one or both of those nights.
8. That’s right. I’m using my blog to advertise my restaurant. Suck it.
9. Reader Amanda R. dressed as PittGirl for Halloween and her boyfriend went as Luke Ravenstahl.
All that’s missing is pigeon guts on her do-me boot tips.
10. New rule to the official rules of the Luke Ravenstahl Move Forward drinking game:
If Luke Ravenstahl and ONLY Luke Ravenstahl tweets the phrase “move forward” in any status update on his twitter account, drink three drinks and reply to him all, “@mayorluke I’m DRINKING! Thanks, buddy!”
11. That dirty bastard Troysus Polamalu was on Jimmy Fallon the other night, showing off his luscious hair, teaching tackling skills, and talking about his charity work.
What a dirty dirty man. I feel dirty just looking at him.
Whoa. Where was I?
(h/t Doug, Lauri, any others I missed)
11. Finally, one of the best emails I’ve ever received:
I’ve been reading your thoughts about our fair city of Pittsburgh for several years now, and really missed your absence before That’s Church appeared. I really look forward to your posts to help me feel closer to home.
So I’m in stuck in California, paying back four years to the military, because the Air Force paid for medical school. My husband and I knew we wanted to come back to Pittsburgh, but were exploring other options as well. I just wanted to let you know that your column about your traveling adventure with your kids (I have two 2 year-olds so I can relate) and the kindness of our fellow Pittsburghers sealed the deal for us. I was in tears by the end, and the next day and I accepted a fellowship in Pittsburgh. Can’t wait to get home!
THAT is what makes this blog worth my time. That’s church.