Sexy update!

Yeah, yeah.  I’m going to write What They’re Really Thinking, as soon as I’ve had a few glasses of wine.

But in the meantime, I received an email DIRECTLY from 84 Lumber’s spokesperson Jeff, informing me that the latest Mrs. Joe Hardy is 51-years-old.

Not going to lie.  I’m shocked.

WTAE informs us that she was a massage therapist in Florida until a few years ago.  This is her fourth marriage as well.

The Post-Gazette has pictures of their wedding day!

And that’s all I’m going to say about that because, psst, 84 Lumber is reading this.

I bet the “fake breasts” comment canceled out any chance I had of getting invited to a Joe Hardy party so that I could see his hyena.

That’s not a euphemism.


  1. Monty
    December 21, 2009 7:06 pm

    She was a massage therapist? Well, I love a story with a happy ending.

    Thank you, I’ll be here all week.

  2. CFluck
    December 21, 2009 7:07 pm

    Glad to hear that 51 is middle age. I’m not to far gone.

  3. summer78
    December 21, 2009 7:18 pm

    I’ll have a glass for you to help you along…

  4. Sooska
    December 21, 2009 7:25 pm

    Before any other idiots make comments about massage therapists, I want to note here that in Pennsylvania they are legitimate health care professionals and will soon be licensed. All others are prostitutes, hookers or whores, but they are NOT massage therapists.

    Glad to see 51 is middle aged. At least Joe is getting further away from the major ICK factor.

  5. Monty
    December 21, 2009 7:41 pm

    Sooska — Lighten up. If we stop all the rub and tug jokes then the terrorists have won.

  6. Bojack
    December 21, 2009 8:17 pm

    Wasn’t there a rub parlor in Market Square before the nannies took over??

  7. Pa-pop
    December 21, 2009 9:07 pm

    What really captures my attention is Joe Hardy’s TWO daughters after he was 74. Say what you want about fake breasts, but Joe is obviously sporting some pretty firm lumber.

    BTW, glad you’re well again, Virginia! Two glasses of wine? Yup, you’re back!

  8. eileen
    December 21, 2009 9:53 pm

    I’m sure she fell for him because of his great personality! Just like the other bimbo’s er ex’s.

  9. Carpetbagger
    December 21, 2009 10:04 pm

    He just got tired of all the texts, and watching Real World, and all the constant Jonas Brothers music, and all the discussion of Twilight. Sparkle, sparkle, sparkle.

    What he compromises on looks he figures he’ll gain in adult conversation. Oh, and messages with a happy ending.

  10. Lynne
    December 22, 2009 7:39 am

    something a little creepy about the look on the face of “name not available” 19 year old son.

  11. Jill
    December 22, 2009 8:55 am

    The look on the face of the 19yr old son is “cha-ching stepdaddy”!!!

  12. Cassie
    December 22, 2009 9:39 am

    I’m with Jill. He’s thinking, “My mama’s so super smart! I want a Porsche for Christmas!”

  13. Matt
    December 22, 2009 10:37 am

    Glad to see Joe is at least trying to find a mate who is almost as old as his own children.

  14. Jim
    December 22, 2009 10:47 am

    Jeff Nobers has one of the toughest jobs in da burgh…putting a good spin on Joe Hardy. Thank God for that Duquesne U education :)

  15. Cindy T.
    December 22, 2009 11:55 am

    I can’t stop laughing at your comments Ginny and all the posted comments too. Having money makes people __________. Well you fill in the blank. Bizarre bizarre behavior.

  16. scott r priester
    December 22, 2009 5:02 pm

    Ohhh I’m laughing too. Laughing at the thought of Joe Hardy even recognizing her existence. I’m laughing at the thought of the mayor or any of the Steelers seeing her in person after all of the stupid shit she has said. And laughing at the “I almost died” post, especially since the tests came back negative for flu. We have lost my wife’s grandmother to natural causes and my seventeen year old cousin to a mysterious heart condition in the past two weeks, two weeks before Christmas nonetheless. And then we have you joking about dying………

  17. Proud Skippy Slut
    December 22, 2009 7:09 pm

    Scott- BLOW ME!!

  18. spoon
    December 23, 2009 9:47 am

    you know when dying is funny, when its a clown. Do you like clowns scott? Do you like movies about gladiators? have you ever been in a in a Turkish prison?

  19. Cindy T.
    December 23, 2009 10:59 am

    Jeez. I was talking about the Joe Hardy comments not about dying.