A silent warning of what I’m capable of.

Why, yes.  Yes, indeed, that is a man wearing a headband made from the wings of an actual pigeon.

It is the creation of a London-based designer, and this pigeon-wing headdress can be found in her … wait for it … Vermin Collection.

That’s right.  Vermin. Ver. Min.  Not “cute little peace-representing birds” and not “God’s creatures.”  Vermin.  A noun defined by Webster as, “Evil sons ‘a bitches.”

I looked it up.

In addition to pigeon-based designs, the designer sells rat bow ties, white rat coin purses, and other VERMIN-based accessories, all in prices ranging from $150 to $3,000.

Now, my first thought was [gag] and that was immediately followed by my second thought, which was [swallow down the mouth throw-up].

My third thought was, “WHO WOULD WEAR A TAXIDERMIFIED PIGEON WING ON THEIR PERSONAL PERSON?!”

And then … [light bulb].

I WOULD!

Think about it.  If there was a man or a woman standing on the sidewalk offering you something, and I mean ANYTHING — an iPad, a half dozen pumpkin spice lattes, a million dollars, a million diamonds, fresh Zima, 500 shirtless pictures of Tyler Grisham, ANYTHING, and that man was also sporting a necklace made of severed human ears, would you even think about approaching him?

Hell, no.

And for that reason, while you’re saving your pennies for an iPad, I’ll be saving mine for this:

Failing getting the $3,000 together for that, I can always practice home taxidermy and just spray an entire can of Aqua Net onto a pigeon wing and then super glue it to a hair comb.  I just need it to keep long enough for the pigeons to see it and run to Satan all, “HAVE YOU SEEN THIS?!  That PittGirl bitch done lost her mind.  I. Quit. [throws down ninja stars in disgust and storms out].”

Mwah-hahaha.

(h/t Amanda)





32 Comments

  1. Cassie
    January 28, 2010 9:39 am

    Nice. That’s pretty short of amazing!



  2. red pen mama
    January 28, 2010 9:43 am

    There are so many things wrong with a wearable collection of vermin based “art” I don’t even know where to start. Ick.



  3. Susan
    January 28, 2010 9:51 am

    Um… remember your other attempts at doing the Martha Frickin Stewart?

    Maybe we need to rethink this plan…



  4. Princess of Quarterbackolonia
    January 28, 2010 9:55 am

    Welcome back-my Thursday has started off with good laugh so it is going to be good day!



  5. Magnus Patris
    January 28, 2010 9:58 am

    Apparently to wear this headband, you must also wear thick black “guy-shadow”, Kabuki makeup, and spend most of your day listening to old “Morrissey” CDs. It also looks like he’s wearing a badger on the top of his head.



  6. Still A Fan
    January 28, 2010 10:10 am

    Rats. I wanted a Steelers post.



  7. Mike
    January 28, 2010 10:19 am

    I want the rat bowtie for Bowtie Tuesdays! However, the price is “upon request.” I’m guessing that just means I can’t afford it. Sigh.



  8. Karen
    January 28, 2010 10:20 am

    Um, don’t even go look at the artist’s website. Really, who wants a large white rat hanging from a chain on their wrist? This woman is disturbed! But, the website does have a disclaimer about how all of the creatures used being “victims of road kill, pest control, or natural death.” Also, “every action is taken to ensure that the remnants of these creatures is not put to waste, but is GROUND AND FED TO OTHER ANIMALS!” Oh, thank goodness!



  9. Carpetbagger
    January 28, 2010 10:21 am

    Adam Lambert thinks that’s hot.

    For $3000, does the eye shadow come with it, or is that extra? I NEEEEEED to know… for a friend.



  10. buttercup
    January 28, 2010 10:23 am

    Forego the aquanet for a nice shot of spray shellac and it’d probably work. Will be anxiously awaiting pics.

    I have nothing against pigeons but I think coture is very interesting. What that has to do with this “artist” and her verminware, I have no idea.



  11. Baba Wawa
    January 28, 2010 10:28 am

    i shouldn’t have clicked on that link…ick…saw what looked like my dear departed hamster “fluffy” on a comb



  12. Political Party Pooper
    January 28, 2010 10:33 am

    I’d offer you the corpses of the pigeons I shoot, but there’s normally not enough left of them to guarantee they were ever pigeons.



  13. bucdaddy
    January 28, 2010 10:39 am

    $3,000?

    *smacks self in forehead*

    Should have known. Was it George Carlin who said, basically, nail together any two things on the face of the earth and some fool will buy it from you?

    Also? The guy in the photo wears that in the Strip, he’s going to get the shit beat out of him. And deservedly so.

    We should send one to Lamont.



  14. Heather
    January 28, 2010 10:41 am

    I needed those on Tuesday. I got poo’d on by a flying pigeon in Oakland…on my nose. I’m still not over it. I used to be all, meh, whatever about pigeons. Now…THEY ALL MUST DIE.



  15. Ashley
    January 28, 2010 10:56 am

    Welp, I guess we better get the “Donate Now!” button back up and running. Where’s Woy?

    Also, glad to see you back.



  16. Annie
    January 28, 2010 11:08 am

    Sounds like Mugatu’s follow-up to his Derelict campaign.



  17. Dan (Not Onarato)
    January 28, 2010 11:26 am

    HAWT.

    Wait….is that Ken Rice modeling?

    HAWT.



  18. LaReina
    January 28, 2010 11:36 am

    Aqua Net and superglue, that’ll do it. Keep duct tape handy, though, just in case.



  19. jennviolet
    January 28, 2010 11:57 am

    Awwwe, I’ve missed you referring to yourself as PittGirl. It just takes me back. Thanks Ginny



  20. G-Man
    January 28, 2010 12:43 pm

    What a neat idea. Regardless of whether you appreciate it as art/couture or not, the important fact is a disgusting pigeon died to make each one. Can that EVER be a bad thing?



  21. Monty
    January 28, 2010 1:36 pm

    That guy looks Mercury/Hermes as interpreted by Bret Easton Ellis.



  22. Sue
    January 28, 2010 2:02 pm

    Missed you. Glad you’re back!



  23. Rajma
    January 28, 2010 2:07 pm

    I can appreciate all the good you have done in the past months and I was riveted to your blog to find out if the babies would be safe, but in short…

    THIS is why I come back everyday.



  24. BrooklynD3175
    January 28, 2010 2:26 pm

    TV can be a good thing. I learned just the other day that the only reason that there are pigeons in NYC is that they were brought over from Europe TO BE EATEN. That’s right. Countries all over the world eat pigeons. Lots of them. And they brought their pigeons here to be consumed. How did we ever lose sight of that?



  25. bluzdude
    January 28, 2010 2:35 pm

    Gah! Monty beat me to it. I was going to say, as far as designing that look, FTD beat them to it.



  26. aDerek
    January 28, 2010 3:02 pm

    I’m seeing a new designer for Johnny Weir’s costumes. Brilliant.



  27. Douglas
    January 28, 2010 3:47 pm

    Personally, I feel good about the return to your regularly scheduled broadcast.



  28. butcher's dog
    January 28, 2010 4:18 pm

    I prefer hot glue to superglue. Sets up quicker and is more flexible…don’t want to lose those bad boys in the wind. And you can get lower-temperature hot glue, which surely is in the running for oxymoron of the month.



  29. Tina Fey
    January 28, 2010 4:26 pm

    Welcome back, Ginger.



  30. Sooska
    January 28, 2010 5:00 pm

    Ginny – you may be able to get this done for free. My cousin attended Juniata College and was a biology major. One of the courses included picking up fresh road kill that was in OK condition (!whatever that means!! and also meant going out to hunt at 2 am) and stuffing it – real taxidermy. She did a squirrel and had it in her bedroom for years. After she got married I believe he was banished to a different room. or the garbage not sure. A pigeon would be a relatively easy “get” I’d think.



  31. Cass
    January 28, 2010 7:32 pm

    Wow – you have some serious passion about the pigeon.



  32. Steeler_tom
    January 28, 2010 7:59 pm

    I see someone beat me to it, but…..
    I double dog dare ya to put up the Donate now button.
    I bet you’d have the 3 grand plus mone for shipping in no time.

    You’ve officially been
    “Double Dog Dared”

    :-)