Viva la SNOW!

As you are aware, the world is ending tonight and Pittsburgh will cease to exist as we know it, and if you’re so flexibly inclined, you may want to bend over and kiss your ass goodbye before your house collapses under the weight of the Great Destroyer Blizzard of Annihilation 2010.

As my mother said when she called me this morning, “Do you need to go to the store?  Did you go to the store?  I sent your father to the store if you need him to pick up anything for you.  Do you need him to get you anything? Did you kiss your ass goodbye yet?  I love you.  God help us all. Stay strong.”

No, this is actually NOT another post about how hilarious Pittsburgh people act when hearing of approaching snow, and how the local media are all THIS IS A DISASTER OF ATOMIC PROPORTIONS WE’RE SEEING APPROACHING THE CITY OF PITTSBURGH.  God bless Jeff Verszyla who remains calm at all times on twitter, simply informing his followers of how much snow they can expect, when and if they might want to alter travel plans, and also to chill the eff out.  It’s winter.

The reason for this post is to let you know that while Las Velas is still open tonight for Happy Hour and regular dinner service, because my husband NEVER closes that restaurant for any reason other than holidays even if it means hiring a sled and a team of dogs to get him to town and then sleeping on the floor of his office, we do care about the safety of the Mariachi Band that is traveling from out of state.  Therefore, Mariachi Night, which was supposed to be tonight will instead be TOMORROW night.  Just in time for the snow to end and for you to be all, “I HAVE GOT TO GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE BEFORE I COOK MY PETS! WHY DIDN’T I GO TO THE GROCERY STORE?!”

So join me tomorrow night from 6-9 for Mariachi Night.  I’ll be behind the bar while my husband tallies up the damage I do to his bottom line.

Also, you have got to go watch this video at KDKA to first, laugh your ass off at the video in general, but also to see that they interviewed a woman in front of the toilet paper display at Giant Eagle.

Why does the media only do this with snow storms?  Why don’t they hit CVS during a spring downpour all, “As you can see, lots of folks in here buying umbrellas today and with more rain on the way, you can expect the galoshes supply to start running short.”

Or maybe during a heat wave, “As you can see, lot of folks in here stocking up on lip balm, sunglasses, and sunscreen in an effort to prevent themselves from bursting into flames.  Ma’am? Ma’am?  I can see you have thrown some SPF 30 lip balm into your cart there.  Do you think that will be enough to stop your lips from crisping black and falling off of your face?”

Oh, hell.  This became a weather post after all.  See you tomorrow!

Sexy update: WTAE is LIVE BLOGGING THE SNOW STORM.

THEY ARE LIVE BLOGGING SNOW!

I CAN’T STOP SHOUTING BECAUSE OF HOW RIDICULOUS THIS IS!

Things really ramped up here; snow is now laying on the grass and starting to very lightly lay on interstates/state roads.

I also can’t stop laughing at how hilarious this is.





82 Comments


  1. BlueNumber2
    February 6, 2010 8:44 am

    Back in 2003 I was sitting down one evening to watch a TV show that I was enjoying at the time. As the appointed time of the show arrived, a graphic came up indicating a Channel 11 special report.

    What was the special report you say? It was a retrospective honoring the 10 year “anniversary” of the Blizzard of ’93.

    Seriously…

    So wait for 10 years from now and maybe a favorite show of yours will be replaced by a similar retrospective of Snowpocalypse 2010.



  2. Sarah
    February 6, 2010 9:29 am

    So here in College Park, MD (home of the UMD Terrapins) we have 25 inches and its still coming down…so DC is buried and essentially useless. Can’t tell anymore that we shoveled 12″ off the front steps at midnight…



  3. LuAnn
    February 6, 2010 9:40 am

    “DC is … essentially useless. ”

    No different than any other day then…



  4. Summer's Kiss
    February 6, 2010 9:41 am

    We have 27 inches in the eastern ‘burbs. And yes, I measured in a couple of different places. Oy vey.



  5. Pingback: The Blog of Burgher Jon » Saturday Musings: The Snow from Charlotte

  6. Megan
    February 6, 2010 11:58 am

    God bless Andy Sheehan, who’s been downgraded from KDKA Investigator to “guy with a camera crew walking around downtown interviewing each person he sees.”



  7. Jen
    February 6, 2010 12:11 pm

    ok, our pittsburgh meteorologists aren’t so bad:

    “AccuWeather.com Snowpocalypse Now! Meteorologist Freakout”
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpxiCxO5k0g



  8. could help myself
    February 6, 2010 12:24 pm

    I just had to ‘live blog’ at WTAE; just once



  9. one-eyed dick
    February 6, 2010 12:28 pm

    Well, gee, I guess I can relate to all of you. It rained here in Sarasota yesterday. Kinda hard, too. And the wind blew a little bit.

    When we have, umm, “weather events” in the Sunshine State, we, too, buy milk, bread and toilet paper. Then we buy alcohol, plywood and generators. And body bags, because you just never know…..

    Now you know what “hunkering down” means.



  10. steeler_tom
    February 6, 2010 1:11 pm

    I can relate to all of yunz.
    I’m marooned in the mojave desert (Edwards AFb, CA) since 1989. and yesterday we had a storm blow in. Raining like all get out but severe damage to many homes here in the form of blown over lawn chairs and the like. (seriously you should see how wacked our people get about a rain storm here!) I am thinking about all of you back there. Glad I’m not at the moment. ALthough if I was I think I would have headed to the cabin, and enjoy being snowbound for a few days…. Sigh….



  11. Pitt Pygmy
    February 6, 2010 1:22 pm

    Good Lord, I feel as though my eyebrows may have been singed off by the burn just thrown my way. I’m going to go have some hot chocolate, get ready to watch the Pens, and remain firm in my stance on global warming, though I will certainly refrain from INSULTING anyone who disagrees, because that’s how my momma raised me.



  12. mike
    February 6, 2010 1:38 pm

    Global warming just started again – the sun just came out!! GO PENS



  13. LaReina
    February 6, 2010 1:40 pm

    Does snow cause diarrhea? Is that why people buy so much TP before the big storm hits?

    I know Al Gore turns my stomach, especially when he’s so wrong about human activity causing global warming and I know he’s in this fraud only to make gazillions of dollars, but he has yet to give me the runs.



  14. northside15212
    February 6, 2010 1:57 pm

    KDKA video was a dud…except for the chick in capri pants at 1:07. I think there is more hype ABOUT the hype about the snow on this blog than anywhere else. Honestly, I don’t see anyone getting worked up about it other than the media.



  15. Bojack
    February 6, 2010 4:00 pm

    @pyg-

    Can you relate to the Heaven’s Gate “believers?” You know, the ones with the purple sneakers??

    They only harmed themselves!

    You quacks, or co-purveyors of horseshit, who refuse to logically investigate claims of such real importance and huge repercussions are no different to me than Germans in 1930-45
    who bought Hitler’s delusions!!!

    So, be insulted Herr Goebbels!!



  16. Political Party Pooper
    February 6, 2010 5:05 pm

    So…I’m thinking about opening up an Auto Body shop In Pittsburgh. What do you guys think?



  17. tim
    February 6, 2010 5:52 pm

    Check out this youtube video for a Toronto version of snow-phobia: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mZEMRAWaVr8



  18. Clair
    February 6, 2010 8:30 pm

    my daughter texted me and said they got 23 inches…she and my mom are in the eastern suburbs up there in Pittsburgh. wonder if she will have school (PCI downtown) on Monday LOL.
    we are in the far west DC metro area and we have about 30 inches in the yard, give or take…32.4 officially at Dulles airport, just around the corner. It’s been an adventure! Our district has already closed school Monday and Tuesday. I actually saw a local news station online calling this the Snowtorious B.I.G. LOL.



  19. Bojack
    February 7, 2010 7:07 am

    OK, here’s a little gift from to Pygmy and Carol’s son!!!

    :-)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjJegaufV6A



  20. Anonymous
    February 7, 2010 11:31 am

    Checked the site because WTAE has a story about about Mayor Lukey being stuck outside of Pittsburgh on his Birthday due to snow. That’s a shame. I bet his mommy was making his favorite desert too! I thought you might know more.



  21. Carol
    February 7, 2010 2:17 pm

    @Bojack

    Perhaps you could rephrase “Pygmy and Carol’s son.” My husband was…puzzled. :D

    And, here’s a little something for you to ponder.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zORv8wwiadQ



  22. Beth
    February 7, 2010 3:28 pm

    @Bojack

    Loved the Herr Goebbels comment, but it hurts when I laugh from shoveling all this dang snow.



  23. Cassie
    February 7, 2010 5:15 pm

    Live blogging snow. Psh.



  24. PittCheMBA
    February 7, 2010 7:11 pm

    Thanks for the TP video, it just reminded me that my supply is running low. I prefer Jeff Verszyla’s forecast over Julie Bologna’s. Why? JV is cool and calm and is not overly dramatic. JB is a drama queen. She hypes the weather too much, emphasizes places like Garret County in Maryland who usually receives more snow, and throws out meteorological terms like freezing fog to prove she is just not eye candy.



  25. Bojack
    February 8, 2010 12:13 am

    @Carol-

    It was a typo- should have been “..from me to pygmy and Carol’s
    son..”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjJegaufV6A

    And your goofy 3-card monte clown with a dry marker can go f’ck himself!! He just rights off column A??
    Let’s just turn the whole f’ing world upside down just in case!!

    What’s a little total economic ruin?? (Except for Al Gore and his butt-buddies?) PLEEEZ

    Just keep drinking the Kool ai better yet, let me give you a PO Box to send $$$ to and we’ll convince the rest of these doubters the sky is falling!!

    WHILE YOU’RE SHOVELING SNOW AND (as Pygmy was arrogantly going to “EXPLAIN)” THAT THESE ‘ANOMALIES’ (lmao) were ‘predicted!’

    Send me the money!! HAHAHA



  26. Ben
    February 8, 2010 10:14 am

    I love people who think that because we still get snow, global warming does not exist. It’s pretty much like my girlfriend always says: If you are republican, you are either dumb, selfish or both.



  27. Herr Goebbles
    February 8, 2010 10:40 am

    Hey Bojack – refering to you Nazi Germany reference….

    When German prisoners were captured and sent to POW camps in America, the Negro army MPs guarding them had to ride in the BACK OF THE TRAIN while the white POWs rode in the front.

    Just sayin, we’re not smarter or less gullible for horse-doodie here in America than anywhere else.



  28. Dash66
    February 8, 2010 11:20 am

    Wow, from a fun article about snowfall and how it’s being reported, we’re getting people getting all upset and calling each other names and being generally classless. (on both sides of the global warming issue, but it makes me embarrassed to see that the worst offender is on my side) Come on guys, why can’t we agree to disagree, shake hands, and let this post go back to being fun, huh?



  29. unsatisfied
    February 8, 2010 11:33 am

    a post about the overhyped-as-usual local weather coverage turns into a mean spirited diatribe evoking nazi germany.

    nice.



  30. Bojack
    February 8, 2010 9:42 pm

    @Ben-
    I surely hope you and your ignorant wench don’t spawn!!

    @unsatisfied-
    Ignorance needs to be exterminated!



  31. Bojack
    February 9, 2010 9:49 am

    Exactly when did the definition of “liberal” change totally from

    ‘open minded,’ ‘consider alternatives,’ ‘explore new paths,’ to
    a singular course of robotic, unquestioning, blind obedience that would make the most fervent Nazi
    or Muslim extremist blush??????????

    There is an “I” beside my name!!!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ml54UuAoLSo



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