Yinz Team Pittsburgh Marathon!

I don’t run. It’s really as simple as that.

I’ll do a nice, brisk walk. I’ll play tennis until my shoes wear out. I’ll do Wii Yoga with Wii Steve until he starts getting smart with me about my balance and then I flip him off with both my middle finger and the remote. I’ll ride a bike until the inevitable accident. I’ll hike. I’ll row. I’ll snowboard.

But pretty much the only time you will see me running is perhaps after my child who is running toward traffic, or after a pigeon I missed, or after David Conrad when he tries to flee, or maybe even after the ice cream truck.

Otherwise, I don’t do the aching legs, burning lungs, pounding head, oozing blisters, and puking my guts out thing.

But here’s five awesome people who are running the Pittsburgh Marathon as a relay team and they’re doing it for the Mario Lemieux Foundation and oh! I would also run after Mario Lemieux if I ever saw him on the street.

Isn’t is surprising that I don’t have any restraining orders against me? To my knowledge.

Running will be:

  • Mike Woycheck, my former/current butler, proprietor of The Sandwich, all around awesome friend, husband to Meg, and father to a cutie pie.
  • Jim Lokay, that KDKA traffic guy who can’t hula hoop to save his life. Hee. Just kidding.  He’s more than that. He’s also an awesome person who is the “Does it Really Do That” reporter.
  • Dudders, who I’ve met, who is female, who has quite possibly one of the best twitter avatars ever.
  • Adrienne, who I’ve also met because she and Dudders are never apart, and who also has a drool-worthy twitter avatar.
  • Jim Shireman, of Sportsocracy fame, a swell guy whose wife is currently expecting boy child number two.

If you’ve got a few bucks to spare, FOR SICK KIDS, please PayPal some moolah via the link on their page, where we’ve been promised a “vomit-by-vomit recap of the race.”

OH! I would also run away from someone who is vomiting near me.

Whaddaya know? I guess I DO run!


  1. Bojack
    April 28, 2010 9:35 am

    Run Forrest run!

  2. Mike
    April 28, 2010 9:36 am

    I would run for playoff tickets!

  3. TheJim
    April 28, 2010 9:47 am

    We only have two team rules: no puking and no dying.

  4. bucdaddy
    April 28, 2010 9:58 am

    “Isn’t is surprising that I don’t have any restraining orders against me?”

    I’ll file for one, if it would make you feel better. They’re free, right?

    I might need your address and phone number and cup size, though. Just in case they ask me for it.

  5. adriennemcc
    April 28, 2010 10:02 am

    Don’t forget TOUCHDOWN DANCE, tehjim. Cuz we will do one after we don’t die! (notice I didn’t say vomit.)

  6. Cassie
    April 28, 2010 10:11 am

    Love it! I missed the window to do a relay team, but next year, I’ll DO IT!

  7. spoon
    April 28, 2010 10:27 am

    I’m so proud of my fellow Yinz Teamers n’at!

    Will you have the tags on your shoes so we can follow your race online? I think Dudders will be the odds on fav for best time since she flows like a whooping crane.

    Lokay – people will yell at him because of the congestion
    Shireman – if he’s not elbowing people he’ll be telling people to get the ef out of his way and probably hit you with something hard… like a hobo
    Woy – inspiration – Barb Filutze, Erie marathon legend.
    Adrienne – she’ll ride on Dudders back while smacking her in the head to go faster

  8. Mel
    April 28, 2010 11:21 am

    Awesome! I’m running in the relay too – final leg cause they tell me it’s flat and downhill :)

  9. Uncle Crappy
    April 28, 2010 11:23 am

    There’s a group of YinzTeamers manning the water station at mile 7.8; I’m still waiting to hear which one of our runners will be on the course at that point so I know which kind of cocktail to have ready. Good luck to all of yinz guys…

    And, Ginny: Snowboarding?

  10. Virginia
    April 28, 2010 12:45 pm

    Uncle Crappy,

    You’d be shocked to know that despite my balance issues, I find snowboarding to be a million times easier than skiing.

    Weird, right?

  11. Heather
    April 28, 2010 1:25 pm

    Nice! Jim Lokay is a cutie pie!

  12. Lauren
    April 28, 2010 1:59 pm

    Awesome : ) I’m flying into town to run the half-marathon, I’ll be sure to look for them and cheer them on. And no, I won’t puke. The whole aching limbs, pounding head, and ESPECIALLY oozing blisters, thing though? Yup. When I go to get my pedicure, I know they’re all talking about my feet in Mandarin. It’s cool though.

  13. Woy
    April 28, 2010 3:18 pm

    Thanks for the shout-out, Ginny!

    This is going to be one scary endeavor.

  14. Patrick
    April 28, 2010 3:42 pm

    Kick some pavement butt big sis (KDudders) and Adrienne!

  15. Dudders
    April 28, 2010 7:52 pm

    Hello Kitty manties!

  16. red pen mama
    April 29, 2010 10:16 am

    Go Yinz Team! While I used to run (in the years BC — before children) I never even seriously considered a competitive 10K let alone any part of a marathon. I’m always in awe of runners who commit to one.

    And, dudders: woah. nice avatar.