The trouble with game sevens.

The trouble with games sevens is that they’re equally critical to both teams, meaning both teams come out playing like Chewbacca on meth.

The trouble with game sevens is that they can be immovable objects (Chewbacca on meth) meeting irresistible forces (Chewbacca on meth).

The trouble with game sevens is that Cinderella might realize the clock is striking midnight on her time at the ball and instead of turning back into a defeated housemaid, she turns into a raging bitch on skates, hell bent on destroying our chances at a consecutive Stanley Cup.

The trouble with game sevens is every second counts. Every penalty might mean the series. Every bar hit might mean an early start to golf season. Every missed save, every missed gimme, every bad call, every little thing … might mean everything.

The trouble with game sevens is that they age you.

The trouble with game sevens is that your heart spends it in a constant state of “OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD,” regardless of if you’re in the lead or not.

The trouble with game sevens is they don’t leave you much time to recover for Game One.

The trouble with game sevens is there might not BE a Game One.

The trouble with game sevens is you can’t escape the feeling you never should have seen this Game Seven.

The trouble with game sevens is WHO CAN WORK WHEN GAME SEVEN STARTS IN ____ HOURS?!

The trouble with game sevens is they make you want to puke or slit your wrists or listen to emo music or rock in place like the crazy people at the crazy home.

Here’s hoping and praying and aggressively stabbing the Marian Hossa Voodoo Doll of Hockey JuJu that the puking and the aging and the OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD feeling will be worth it at the end of the third period.

Let’s go, Pens!





26 Comments

  1. Angry Mongo
    May 12, 2010 1:01 pm

    The trouble with game sevens is there is no game eight.



  2. Dan
    May 12, 2010 1:02 pm

    Hey everyone. If you can please click “I support this lionheart” on the left hand side after you click the link. It is for my philanthropy, The Backyard Run.

    http://www.robinhoodlionhearts.com/index.php?id=dtimko_backyardrun13205&m=profile

    Thanks! GO PENS GO PENS GO PENS!



  3. Dan (Not Onarato)
    May 12, 2010 1:19 pm

    The trouble with Game Sevens is that the pucker factor does not go away if you win…you still have another round to go!

    Lets go Pens!



  4. Stephen
    May 12, 2010 1:22 pm

    If the Pens lose tonight, they can save the city of Pittsburgh some scratch by destroying the arena after the game. Just putting it out there.



  5. oldgraymare
    May 12, 2010 1:29 pm

    the problem with game seven is that if we lose, all we have for the next 2 and a half months is the Pirates! LET’S GO PENS!!!!



  6. bluzdude
    May 12, 2010 1:42 pm

    The problem with game sevens is that the clock is either racing out of control like a teenager on a major league baseball diamond, or putzing along like a Pensacola geezer with no apparent destination, depending on who is in the lead.



  7. spoon
    May 12, 2010 1:43 pm

    We must win tonight. I’m not ready to shave this pimpin beard off yet!



  8. Monty
    May 12, 2010 1:44 pm

    It may be nerve-wracking, but this is the first time something good could happen involving the #7 since early March.



  9. Pensgirl
    May 12, 2010 2:07 pm

    Game sevens are what life is all about.

    Tip: Work out while you watch. You’re so focused on the game, and there’s so much adrenaline pumping through you, that you don’t even notice that your body is keeping up with the pace of the action until intermission hits and by then you’ve run the equivalent of 66 miles.



  10. Bojack
    May 12, 2010 2:16 pm

    V-

    Please get off of the fence and decide who you are rooting for!!

    :-)



  11. gunnlino
    May 12, 2010 2:28 pm

    I’ve watched more game sevens than I care to think about. I’ve been aged exponentially as a result of the OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD feeling. My son, living in Seattle tells me to try decaf. I prefer Johnny Walker.

    Go Pens !



  12. Jaime
    May 12, 2010 2:35 pm

    The problem with game seven is that its one big during all of the OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD moment and there’s not time to run out to get more beer after you’ve drank it all throughout the game!

    The Igloo cannot and will not go out a loser tonight. CANNOT.



  13. Kathy
    May 12, 2010 2:49 pm

    The problem with THIS game seven is that if things don’t go our way, then the last game at the Igloo would always be remembered as a loss. There is more than just one year’s playoff run on the line here….



  14. HokieRider
    May 12, 2010 3:05 pm

    Thanks for perfectly summing up Game 7. I’ll be the one in NoVA screaming bloody murder. My malady has a name and it is hockey tourettes. Good or bad, some noise is coming out of my mouth and its going to be loud.

    Go Pens!!



  15. burgher-licious
    May 12, 2010 3:28 pm

    The problem with game sevens is that we may not be able to see Letang Sex Hair (wiping slobber from the corner of my mouth) until next season. Please God don’t let that happen.

    LETS GO PENS – MAKE THE “HABS” THE “HAB-NOTS”



  16. Sooska
    May 12, 2010 3:44 pm

    Game sevens are what Badger meant when he said “It’s A Great day for Hockey!”



  17. Sarah
    May 12, 2010 4:09 pm

    The problem with game 7 is that I still have to work in a place with no TV and no radio that I have control over and no customers will come in between 6:30 and 9:30… ::sigh::



  18. Steve in Denver
    May 12, 2010 4:26 pm

    The problem with game 7 is that we could have three of them in the next 4 weeks!

    Another problem with game 7 is that we didn’t get the 12″ of snow that was threatened so I will have to coach kids soccer. Booooo!



  19. Leah
    May 12, 2010 4:27 pm

    “Here’s hoping and praying and aggressively stabbing the Marian Hossa Voodoo Doll of Hockey JuJu that the puking and the aging and the OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD feeling will be worth it at the end of the third period.”

    AMEN SISTER!!! You have quite the way with words. Love it.



  20. Dan (Not Onarato)
    May 12, 2010 4:36 pm

    Well put #16 Sooska. Im pretty sure Badger Bob would be chomping at the bit right now with a big ol grin on his face.

    The Igloo CANNOT go out with a loss



  21. CrashJK
    May 12, 2010 4:46 pm

    I’m ready…my beer is cold, heart strong and in the Pens, Mario and Shero I trust….let’s go boys…Charlie says DO IT !!!



  22. Scott
    May 12, 2010 9:24 pm

    I blew past throwing up a little in my mouth and on to projectile vomiting about 5 minutes into the 1st period….



  23. Bojack hates texts
    May 12, 2010 9:50 pm

    Patrick Roy Halak



  24. Numnuts
    May 14, 2010 10:47 pm

    sucks



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