Virginia Montanez, Pittsburgh PD, Operations Namer

Pittsburgh Police are hard at work in Schenley Park, cracking down on illicit sexual trysts between men.

Guess what they named their operation.

No.

No.

Not even close.

Pittsburgh Police have launched Operation Hot Rod in response to people complaining about indiscreet sexual activity in Schenley Park.

Seriously! Operation Hot Rod!

Who gets to name the operations for the cops? Can I have that job, because I would be fantastic.

Crackdown on crack dealers:  Operation Crackalackin’ Shacklin’

Crackdown on back taxes: Operation Hide Your Kneecaps

Crackdown on prostitution in the Hill: Operation I Found my Thrill Up on The Hill

Crackdown on indecent exposure in nightclubs: Operation Thongalicious

Crackdown on illegal pets: Operation These Boots Will Be Made From Your Alligator or Operation There’s a Monkey on Your Back Porch

Crackdown on underage drinking: Operation All You Bitches Take My Shots

Also:

One of the undercover officers involved in making the arrests told KDKA-TV he saw a grown man standing by his car in the park. The man wasn’t wearing a stitch of clothing other than his shoes and socks.

Wait. Are we absolutely sure he wasn’t just taking the Post-Gazette’s “Less Than Underwear” advice and got confused? Maybe he’s just really hot. Maybe his bra and panties are in his freezer.

(h/t @pghsciencenerd)





26 Comments

  1. PK
    July 8, 2010 10:28 am

    Wait a minute…the KD report calls the Prospect Drive area of Schenley the “Wedding Circle?”

    WTF?

    Every self-respecting queer knows it’s called the Fruit Loop. Sheesh.

    And cruising has been going on there for ages. Wonder who got their knickers in a twist enough to get the police involved?



  2. Kim Z
    July 8, 2010 10:55 am

    The full name is the “Kordell Stewart Memorial Operation Hot Rod.”



  3. Nicole
    July 8, 2010 11:15 am

    FANTASTICAL POST (YEP I MADE UP THAT WORD). One of the BEST I have ever seen on here – I LOVE all the names of operations you came up with!



  4. Cindy T.
    July 8, 2010 11:17 am

    You’ve got the “Operations Namer” job — here I sit snortin and laughin at my desk



  5. OldNorthSider
    July 8, 2010 11:18 am

    PK — my dear departed dad who worked in Oakland always referred to the ‘fruit loop’ as the ‘wedding circle’ explaining to us, “That’s were men go to get married!” He always added, “Don’t you girls drive back there!”. Funny, it was probably safer for us to go there than the Decade!

    But Ginny — you are hysterical with the underage drinking crackdown; Operation All You Bitches Take My Shots — freaking priceless.



  6. Erin
    July 8, 2010 11:29 am

    Hahahaaa! You have killed me.



  7. captain hankaroo
    July 8, 2010 11:31 am

    Ah Ginny I think I love you
    Hysterical



  8. Pa-pop
    July 8, 2010 11:43 am

    Operation Hot Rod? Apparently the terms spark plug, dipstick, piston, ring job and rear bumper were already taken.



  9. Sooska
    July 8, 2010 11:45 am

    alternative name for Hot Rod: Operation Its a Hard Days Night.

    for prostitution: Operation Beaver. Damn!

    I now have “All You Bitches Take My Shots” rolling around in my head to the tune of All You Single Ladies…



  10. Lizzy
    July 8, 2010 12:28 pm

    OMG Ginny, freaking hahahalarious! Thanks, needed a good laugh!



  11. Magnus Patris
    July 8, 2010 12:33 pm

    Funny, I thought the guy in the picture would be much better dressed.
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/34837770@N06/4774879518/



  12. Joe K.
    July 8, 2010 1:02 pm

    Maybe they had to use that name since “Operation Shutdown” was taken by George Hendricks a while ago…



  13. Angry Mongo
    July 8, 2010 1:23 pm

    My name is Rod and I like to party…



  14. PG Wodehouse
    July 8, 2010 1:48 pm

    With apologies to Bob Prince re: hill prostitution

    Operation Chicken on the Hill with Will.



  15. PK
    July 8, 2010 1:59 pm

    @OldNorthSider – Thanks…don’t think I’ve ever heard it referred by that name.

    Has anyone watched the video? No wonder some of those guys were cruising. If that one guy owned a hot rod you certainly couldn’t find it under his belly roll.



  16. BeauJacques
    July 8, 2010 2:18 pm

    Operation Rump Ranger



  17. k
    July 8, 2010 2:26 pm

    While sipping from my water bottle I read
    “Crackdown on underage drinking: Operation All You Bitches Take My Shots”
    and simultaneously choked and managed to squirt water into my nose and all over my glasses.
    Good job!



  18. unsatisfied
    July 8, 2010 2:28 pm

    @ joe k — actually, “operation shutdown” belonged to derek bell. but, hendrick was the derek bell before derek bell….

    so — for cracking down on papertowel-dispenser-detroying placekickers, would it be “operation bounty”? or, maybe just “operation douchebag”, as it would be more all-encompassing….



  19. Steverino
    July 8, 2010 2:32 pm

    It’s been called the Fruit Loop for years. It’s mostly “straight” married guys who hang out there. The out gays have no real reason to go up there other than to socialize, since most people hook up over Mr. Internet now. It’s the married guys who need to keep their secrets and don’t want to leave an Internet trail from gay.com.

    And really, with all they have to do to keep them busy, the police are wasting time busting guys up there?



  20. Julie_Gong
    July 8, 2010 3:57 pm

    i hear that’s called the “fruit loop.” And no i’ve never been there. ok, maybe once. whatever. it’s fine. really.



  21. Steverino
    July 8, 2010 4:07 pm

    I’m sure this had to be BREAKING NEWS! on KDKA! Isn’t everything these days?



  22. Joe K.
    July 8, 2010 4:53 pm

    @ unsatisfied: You’re right, I got my Pirates free-agent slackers mixed up. Sad how it all kind of runs together.



  23. Cnik
    July 8, 2010 5:26 pm

    The real question is ‘how soon till one of the Steelers gets busted there?’

    At least no restroom = less chance Ben could end up in trouble there…



  24. Luke Steelerstahl
    July 8, 2010 6:56 pm

    Crackdown on governmental corruption:

    Operation Steelerstahl



  25. bucdaddy
    July 8, 2010 8:24 pm

    So who’s the Senator in the picture?



  26. Lisa J
    July 8, 2010 8:42 pm

    Ahahahahaha…hehehehehe…hahahahaha…(deep breath)… hahahaha…
    Ok I’m done. Thanks I needed a good laugh today.