What They’re Really Thinking: Inconclusive Evidence Edition

In order for us to get through this post by the time Gene Steratore is done explaining why he ruled the way he did on the fumble recovery, it is important that we let him get started now:

We’ll check back in with Gene momentarily.

Let’s talk about the game.

1. First, Daniel Tosh can kiss my ass. Hard.

2. The first part of the first quarter of the game was played in an alternate universe where the Steelers were prone to turnovers.

First a fumble and loss on a kickoff return and then Ben Roethlisberger coughed it up and just like that, it’s 6-0 Miami.

3. Let’s check back in with Gene.

Still busy. We’ll get back to him shortly. Someone get that man a Telestrator.

4. Mike Wallace again with the long ball for a touchdown, this catch to the tune of like 50+ yards. What is it about that man that allows him do that so often? He’s leading the NFL in yards per catch right now. Is it just that he runs so fast he gets ahead or is it, as my brother-in-law said, “He’s incapable of running a route and just runs straight, so he gets there fast.”

Whatever, BIL, you’re just jealous that he’s a billion times hotter now that the faux hawk is gone.

5. Back to Gene:

And back to the game. More from Gene in a bit.

6.  James Harrison managed to get through the game without an illegal hit. Bravo, James! You can do iiiit!

7. I don’t believe Hines Ward is aging. He shows no signs of slowing down at all, even looking to be injured but coming back in two plays later.

Beautiful catches and always with the smile. Did you see him score that touchdown when he should have been pushed out at like the 10-yard line, but evaded the tackler and then ran with a man on his back to the end zone?

Mad love for Hines yesterday. Mad love.

8. Let’s go to Gene:

WHOA, GENE! We’ll cut you off right there and we’ll be back in a minute. Keep working.

9. Someone finally put the brakes on Rashard Mendenhall’s bulldozer because the boy couldn’t do anything yesterday. I don’t know so much that that is his fault or the fault of the miserable performance by the O-line.

Also, quoting my mother to my father… “You’re right, dear, I don’t believe that O-line likes Ben very much. They’re not protecting him.”

10. Back to Gene!

God, Gene. Wrap it up. I’m almost done talking about the game here. Sheesh.

11. We have lost Aaron Smith for likely the season, add to that injuries to Woodley and Flozell Adams and yesterday’s win was costly to the Steelers.

12. It’s raining today.

13. How do you pronounce Worilds last name?

14. Gene?

Ugh. I’m trying to stall so that Gene can have time to finish explaining himself. It’s not working.

15. The big controversy of course is that Benny dove for a touchdown while the Steelers were down by one late in the fourth quarter. He lost the ball, but the ruling on the field was that it was a touchdown. After a challenge, it was determined that it was not a touchdown, but was in fact a fumble.




After what seemed like a twenty-minute explanation in which he may have mentioned oranges, proboscis monkeys and Jupiter, Gene said that they couldn’t determine who recovered the ball and therefore, it’s the Steelers ball on fourth down at the two-yard-line and here comes Skippy Skeeve to put us over the top, much to the horror of all of Miami.

Internet, we lucked out. It seemed to me that Benny fumbled, Miami recovered and it should have been a Miami ball.

The Gods of Football smiled down on us and that win, while totally a stolen win, is still a win.

I feel for Miami though. If the shoe was on the other foot, my couch would have been on my porch, in flames.

16. Let’s let Gene take us out of this post:

I gotta stop him there. We’re out of time. Let’s just assume his paper is entitled, “How to make yourself the most hated man in Miami.”

Just keep telling yourself, Pittsburgh, a win is a win is a win is a win is a win …


  1. Stephen
    October 25, 2010 3:55 pm

    This only goes to prove the the NFL has it out for the Steelers!

    Wait a minute…

  2. Carpetbagger
    October 25, 2010 3:56 pm

    If there were a list of cities that I would choose over Pittsburgh (and I’m not saying that such a list exits), Miami would be nowhere friggin’ near the hemisphere in which I would (or would not) even write such a list.

    Gene Steratore: “and multiply by Daniel Tosh’s Q of .00006…”

  3. Carpetbagger
    October 25, 2010 3:56 pm

    Q rating, that is. *headdesk*

  4. Fabulous Fails
    October 25, 2010 4:01 pm

    Yesterday after listening to the game (I live in Nashville now) I said to myself…”Can’t WAIT to read this weeks edition of WTRT!” Thanks for the laughs. Always.

  5. DawniePitt8
    October 25, 2010 4:06 pm

    I think the reason the recievers are able to make their amazing catches is because they have a quarterback who can stand his ground, give them time to get downfield and get the ball to them. Just sayin….

  6. Me
    October 25, 2010 4:10 pm

    How do you pronounce Worilds last name?


  7. YinzerInExile
    October 25, 2010 4:18 pm

    I have driven through Miami. And connected flights in Miami. And caught a cruise ship in Miami. And if you add up all of the time thus spent in Miami, it is about 72,346,092 times more time than I would ever have wished to spend in Miami NOT sitting in a little cafe and cramming my face full of Cuban food. I, Daniel Tosh (whoeverinthehellYOUare?), would rather live in Siberia, in a tent, with only a Victoria’s Secret knicker set to keep me warm, than spend 3 more (Cuban foodless) hours in Miami. Blecch.

  8. aDerek
    October 25, 2010 4:22 pm

    1. Tosh is wrong about Pgh, but at least he gets it that the Steelers Nation doesn’t just “travel well”. We actually live in all these other cities.

  9. Butcher's Dog
    October 25, 2010 4:23 pm

    Beware the karma boomerang, though, which may have already struck with losing Aaron Smith. Now we’ll have to settle for trying to convince Philly fans the NHL has it in for the Pens. Tough sell, that one.

    In defense of the zebras, once they ruled touchdown they didn’t give a rat’s ass who recovered. And the video didn’t help. It’s all in the rules, Miami. Get someone to read them to you sometime (besides Gene, of course).

  10. Amy
    October 25, 2010 4:29 pm

    Like it or not, it was the right call according to the rules. Peter King summed it up nicely in his Monday Morning Quarterback article in SI.

    The Stillers were lucky for the win, but it certainly cost us plenty.

  11. Pensgirl
    October 25, 2010 4:30 pm

    There was a season not too long ago in which the NFL had to apologize to the Steelers at least twice (quite possibly thrice – my memory is fuzzy on that point) for blowing calls that aided in Steeler losses.

    I did not see this game and thus cannot offer any intelligent opinion on the play or resulting call, but as far as I’m concerned if the ref did blow the ruling, it was a partial repayment from Karma.

  12. unsatisfied
    October 25, 2010 4:47 pm

    once steratore (oooooh, he’s from washington, pa — pittsburgh’s little bitch! conspiracy!!!) said “touchdown”, the other zebras considered the play dead.

    and, in the days before replay, that would have been it (though, there would be not stopping the crying down in MIA).

    the NFL will have to take a look at this and determine what happens when a play is done and when it’s REALLY done in these days of challenge flags.

    as for steratore’s explanation — while I love the version above, I might have preferred it as a haiku.

  13. Wendielu
    October 25, 2010 4:48 pm

    Oh, and I’m SURE Miami has never had a call go their way that resulted in a win, right? *eyeroll*

    Now I want Cuban food.

  14. Michael
    October 25, 2010 4:55 pm

    Who the hell is Daniel Tosh and why should I give a rat’s ass what he thinks about the ‘Burgh?

  15. Monty
    October 25, 2010 5:07 pm

    I made a promise to myself when that play was under review that, if the Steelers could pull off a win, I would make it my life mission to find Andrew Stockey and ask him whether Wendy Bell ever gave him a boob feel.

  16. Virginia
    October 25, 2010 5:11 pm

    I might have to call this early as a win for Monty.

  17. Paul
    October 25, 2010 5:17 pm

    Tosh is a talentless hack that has a show, making fun of youtube videos, on Comedy Central. Which makes his commentary on Pittsburgh that much more useless. The game was a nail biter for sure, but the call was correct. Aside: did anybody else want to slap the smirk off of Gene Steratore’s face every time he handed the Steelers a penalty? I swear he was loving that.

  18. Cassie
    October 25, 2010 5:18 pm

    @Monty, you always crack my s*** up. Srrsly.

  19. Annie
    October 25, 2010 6:02 pm

    @unsatisfied – My brain also went all conspiracy theory. I wouldn’t want to knock Steratore’s integrity, but just maybe he was looking at the monitor thinking “hmmmm, this call could go either way, but… oh what the hell — here we go Steelers, here we go.” My dad was on an officiating crew with Gene Sr., but I never met his son so I can’t confirm that Gene Jr. is a Steelers fan.

  20. bluzdude
    October 25, 2010 6:49 pm

    I thought for sure you were going to use that pic of the Duke laying on his stomach, cheesing it up after the TD pass.

  21. Fester
    October 25, 2010 7:01 pm

    While I am happy the Steelers won, Miami did get hosed. The refs never should have called it a TD. They should have let the play continue and determined who recovered the fumble. If Ben had crossed the goal line before fumbling, the Steelers would have challenged it. Refs are told to err on letting the play go if there is uncertainty as it concerns ball control. The idea being that if there was no fumble, it would be easier for replay to determine as opposed to a situation where there is a scrum for a fumbled ball, as happened in this case.

    While I don’t think the Steelers are a darling of the NFL, many fans around the country do think this is the case. I used to live near Seattle and the people there still think they got hosed in the 2005 SB.

    In the big picture, it is important that fans believe the outcomes of these games are random, not pre-determined. Sports are the only true reality TV. If fans believe the league favors certain teams, it hurts the league’s credibility.

  22. Z
    October 25, 2010 7:44 pm

    Best WTRT yet. thanks for the laugh.

  23. Vivian formerly NY Luvs Pitts
    October 25, 2010 7:45 pm

    We’ll take the win however we can get it. And Daniel Tosh can kiss my Tush!!!

  24. Kate
    October 25, 2010 8:14 pm

    Tosh grew up and went to college in Florida. From his wiki: “He attributes his decision to work in comedy to having been raised in Florida, which he considers “flat, hot and dumb.” Whatever.

  25. bucdaddy
    October 25, 2010 8:51 pm

    11. Flozell

    I asked my doctor about that and now I don’t have to pee as often.

    October 25, 2010 8:56 pm

    I was at the game yesterday and I think the call was the right one considering the refs did mess up on the TD call. I get that once it was called no one was concerned with who had the ball, sucks, but I get it. As for saying that call hosed Miami and caused them to lose the game, I don’t think so. We gave them two opportunities in the form of turnovers at the beginning to get TWO TDs which, thanks to our D, only resulted in FGs. Plus, after the bizarre call which gave us the ball back, Miami’s offense was on the field again with plenty of time left on the clock and we stopped them again. Definitely a weird call, definitely a great game, but I refuse to say that Miami was robbed due to a single call.

  27. Noelle
    October 25, 2010 9:21 pm

    I’m just sorry there was no mention of the Dolphafloozies. They have hoeleaders right?

  28. Noelle
    October 25, 2010 9:23 pm

    I was RIGHT! And again they wear those stupid plastic go-go boots. Who makes these things??? http://www.miamidolphinscheerleaders.net/

  29. MM
    October 25, 2010 10:09 pm

    Not sure about anyone else but Aaron Smith being “out for the season” is getting a little old:(

  30. PittinDC
    October 25, 2010 10:25 pm

    To be fair, Daniel Tosh is right… a lot of us leave Pittsburgh. But it’s not because we don’t want to live in Pittsburgh. It’s because we need jobs. Or refuse to go to college down the street from our parent’s house!

  31. red pen mama
    October 26, 2010 8:44 am

    I would like, one of these weeks of this NFL season, for Pittsburgh to be in the national media because of the excellent football they are playing. Not because of a suspended QB, a whiny DB (LB? sorry), or a blown/controversial call. I mean, if Miami is bent about how the call went down, that’s too bad; dem’s the rules, and they had plenty of opportunity to not have it come down to the zebras’ short attention spans (i.e. TD = end of play). Pittsburgh barely played well enough to win as it was.

    My vote goes to @Monty for the comments win, although I appreciate @bucdaddy and @noelle as well. Keep up the good work everyone.

    Finally: I would like to observe that Coach Tomlin makes every other coach in the NFL look like a complete spaz.

  32. Mike
    October 26, 2010 11:51 am

    Wow, and just think, for all this time, I thought the only reason to not watch Tosh.o (Daniel Tosh’s show) is because it sucks. Now I have another reason not to watch.
    But the first reason really was enough.

  33. Matt DC
    October 26, 2010 2:22 pm

    A standing ovation for that tour de force on the rules of the game. I left the room, got a beer, and checked the other games before the ref finished his explanation, but thanks to Ginny, I didn’t miss a thing. This week’s WTRT is better than a session with Juan William’s psychiatrist. Only free.