Here’s something I forgot to post earlier this month when I was playing catch-up following my brief mental health hiatus.
Ask a normal person who they were rooting for in the Winter Classic, and you’d probably have gotten at most a two-word answer.
Unless you’re Eileen from Blawnox, then you’d say, “Put the puck in the Caps’ five-hole, baybee.”
Or, in the case of filmmaker Kevin Smith, you mutter “huevos” into the face of Twitter’s 140 character limit and you write a mini-movie with a whole lot of passion and a little bit of TMI.
I took the time to snip these so you don’t have to find them and read them in reverse order.
Ode to the Burgh. By THAT Kevin Smith.
And then he has about five tweets rambling on about the Winter Classic versus the Winter Heritage game or some other such blah blah blah like only Kevin Smith can blah blah blah.
Internet, I hope you learned your lesson about asking Kevin Smith questions. I suggest future questions be handwritten and mailed to him via snail mail and include at the end of your letter, “Circle one: Yes or No. Do not use the back of this paper for additional answer space. JUST A SIMPLE YES OR NO WILL DO, KEVIN.”
However, since he used his verbosity to profess his unfailing love for the Burgh, that makes it all better.
Now if you’ll excuse me, that mental image of Kevin Smith “boning like a rabbit” needs to be mind-bleached from my brain.