NinjaMan does NOT save the day

WTF?

A Westmoreland County man denies he was outside running around pretending to be a ninja, but acknowledges he did leave his 4-year-old son home alone sleeping while he went jogging.

But police insist Mr. Hurst was dressed all in black and “playing ninja” when they confronted him. They say Mr. Hurst claimed his mother was baby-sitting, but she told police she wasn’t.

Mr. Hurst is 28.

Thoughts:

  • Are ninjas real? Or are they like leprechauns?
  • He got caught. He must not be a very good ninja.
  • My eight-year-old nephew “plays ninja” by wrapping his head and face in a shirt and running through the house all, “I AM A NINJA!”
  • How does a 28-year-old man “play ninja”?
  • Is it like LARPing except with more [awkward kung fu moves]?
  • I think the last acceptable age for a person to pretend to be a ninja outside of Halloween or movie acting is 12. After that, it’s just creepy.
  • Is there any kind of “jogging” that could be mistaken for “playing ninja” and if so, what would that jogging look like?
  • I have some ideas in my head and THEY. ARE. AWESOME.
  • [awkward kung fu moves]




21 Comments

  1. bucdaddy
    March 17, 2011 10:46 am

    Is it just me or is Westmoreland County a giant asylum?



  2. Dan (Not Onorato)
    March 17, 2011 10:51 am

    It should be if it isnt and while were at it, can we just sell Fayette-nam? That county is embarassing



  3. bucdaddy
    March 17, 2011 11:09 am

    I’m paraphrasing a line someone else concocted about western Maryland, but if Pa. sold Fayette County to West Virginia it would raise the IQ of both states. Might as well toss in Greene County too. To think, the British fought the French and Indians over both of them.



  4. Butcher's Dog
    March 17, 2011 11:46 am

    I, too, thought the key phrase was “Westmoreland County man”. But bucdaddy, don’t be so hard on West-by-God.



  5. DG
    March 17, 2011 11:53 am

    Is Ninja pretending all that far removed from Awkward Kung Fu Moves? Just a question.

    Also, I’m pretty sure the issue is leaving a 4 year old home along at 1:30 in the morning. He could have been going to mass, walking his imaginary dog, or fighting aliens, and I think the result would have been the same.



  6. Cassie
    March 17, 2011 12:11 pm

    I’m picturing Phoebe from Friends running. In all black. With an extra touch of crazy.



  7. Mike Frazer
    March 17, 2011 1:15 pm

    That would be “Ninjogging”.

    And even at 12 it’s creepy. Elementary school ends for most at 10 or 11. Once you are in middle school, the only thing you get to pretend is having a real mustache or real boobs.



  8. Jim
    March 17, 2011 1:16 pm

    I’m thinking, if a man is dressed all in black and found running at 1:30 in the morning, I need to ask what he is running away from, like maybe the house he just tried to break into but almost got caught? He’s damn sure doing something sneaky. But when the cops stop him and ask what he is doing, he says, “Umm, I’m playing Ninja” and they BUY IT?? Seriously, what a brilliant piece of police work this was!



  9. fone guy stan
    March 17, 2011 1:26 pm

    Ther’s more info at KDKA.com



  10. Pensgirl
    March 17, 2011 1:38 pm

    In the eloquent words of Red Forman: “Dumbass.”



  11. bucdaddy
    March 17, 2011 1:46 pm

    B-Dog,

    Nobody’s harder on West Virginia than West Virginians. We know all the jokes, and we use them. Frequently.



  12. AngryMongo
    March 17, 2011 1:54 pm

    WestMoCo! Yes, we are a gene or two away from being like my birth county, Fayette Nam. In fact, some will claim that the Manson Nixon line actually runs along the Yough in Connellsville.

    But we aren’t all nuts, we’re all ninjas!



  13. Julia
    March 17, 2011 2:12 pm

    The Ninja wasn’t in Fayette-nam, he was in Scottdale, PA, which may be next to the border of Fayette-nam, but trust me, it’s not! I grew up there. I’m glad Scottdale made the news, though. Maybe now when I tell people where I’m from, instead of the usual ‘where’s that?’ I can lead in with ‘You know, where the ninja was prowling around at 1:30 in the morning.’

    The news last night said the guy was looking for a job (at 1:30 in the morning, dressed like a ninja), and was drunk and angry and doesn’t really remember much. And that it was probably a mistake to leave his 4-year old son home alone. I love my hometown. We’ve come so far from the mother-daughter hooker duo of my day.



  14. bucdaddy
    March 17, 2011 2:21 pm

    That mother-daughter hooker duo still working? That might actually be worth $50. At least between them they should have a full set of tee …

    What? Oh, shaddup. I hear Senior Porn is all the rage.



  15. Dan (Not Onorato)
    March 17, 2011 2:57 pm

    Wow…Bucdaddy went there…just wow

    Pass the brain bleach for the mental pics



  16. Beky
    March 17, 2011 4:04 pm

    Well, at least he wasn’t playing Samurai with that constume and a sword. If the police had come across that sight at 1:30a.m. he may have gotten shot.



  17. Butcher's Dog
    March 17, 2011 4:06 pm

    Senior Porn. West Virginia jokes. Drunken Ninja-not child endangerers. Not the most productive day we’ve ever had, I’m thinkin’. Blame March Madness.



  18. Beatrice
    March 17, 2011 6:48 pm

    Your thoughts on the “ninja” are hilarious.



  19. Kathy
    March 17, 2011 8:10 pm

    after the comments, I’m glad he was only a drunk not ninja instead of explaining he was looking for the mother-daughter. ;~)



  20. Ms. CarolineFB
    March 18, 2011 12:07 pm

    This was my favorite news story this week. Your thoughts make it even better.



  21. Scott
    March 18, 2011 2:15 pm

    If you want to see a REAL ninja then check out this WV Hillbilly Ninja! And if you follow his lead, you too might be able to be a ninja one day!

    http://www.youtube.com/user/diemondavedotcom#p/u/7/_j1-xQA_ufE