1. You’re going to get to the end of this post and some of you might want to Google “shart.” I can’t discourage you enough from clicking on “images” once you do.
The neuralyzer is NOT A THING YET.
2. I don’t understand how Pajama Jeans are different from Jeggings, but then again, what do I know about high fashion? Nothing.
I’m also confused about Slankets and Snuggies.
With that deep thought out of my brain, watch this video from WPXI in which a bunch of staffers try the Pajama Jeans.
There are two things that are awesome about this video. The first is that Julie Bologna does some shimmy dancing in the Pajama Jeans. The other is that there are certain parts of this video where you’d swear you were watching an SNL spoof.
(h/t Ms. Mon)
3. Those of you who like to show your support for organizations and causes via charity runs and walks, I have three that might interest you!
- The most imminent is the Community Human Services Walk to End Poverty for All that is taking place this Saturday. CHS is the organization I wrote about at Christmastime that provides holiday gift cards to the most needy Pittsburghers to give them the dignity of buying basic necessities for themselves at area stores. There is still time to register for the walk which takes place in North Park. Here’s a stat that will punch you in the gut. Ready? In Pittsburgh, every fourth person standing in a soup kitchen line is a child. Think about that for a second.
- Then on April 10, you have the Pittsburgh Super Stroll, not to be confused with the Superhero Run I already told you about. The Super Stroll takes place on the Pitt campus and benefits the Free Care Fund at Children’s Hospital of Pittsburgh. SICK KIDS.
- One in the beginning stages planning is the Lisa Clay Styles Memorial Race and Walk taking place this June 25 at South Park. You remember Lisa was an avid runner and the young mother who was killed by an under-the-influence driver while she was jogging and pushing her young child in a stroller in Mt. Lebanon. This race will be stroller-friendly for those of you that run like mothers.
4. David Conrad will be narrating Twisted Storybook Favorites for the Pittsburgh Symphony on May 6 and May 8.
Audience favorite Peter and the Wolf usually tells the story of a young boy, his animal friends and an evil wolf, with the instruments of the orchestra portraying different characters. However, in this Pittsburgh-focused, tongue-in-cheek adaptation, the classic story — narrated by Pittsburgh native David Conrad — is changed to reflect modern times in our city.
I hope Lukey is the young boy and Steely McBeam is the wolf. I hope it ends with them falling into a giant pothole.
5. Jamie Dixon won Sporting News’ Coach of the Year, whose voting took place prior to the NCAA tournament where Pitt flamed out early due to a crazy last-second bracket-destroying foul that I’m still bitter about.
6. A Mt. Lebanon man was living in Japan when the tsunami and earthquake struck and decided to stick around to help.
“What kind of person would I be if in fair weather I’d readily participate in the give and take of friendship, but in the midst of the storm just pack up and leave?”
It’s a ‘Burgh thing, he said.
“Don’t Pittsburghers fiercely protect their friends and family?” he wrote.
(h/t Laura B.)
7. The Mayor launched a volunteerism program today saying:
“I’m going to do this myself,” Mr. Ravenstahl said. “I’m going to be a sixth-grade mentor.”
Write your own “and a child shall lead them” joke and TRY THE VEAL!
I kid, but it does sound like a promising program.
8. This has nothing to do with Pittsburgh, but if you manage to successfully stash 54 bags of heroin, 34 empty heroin baggies, prescription pills and 51 bucks and change into your girl parts, I’m going to reward you with a link.
She sounds like a circus freak. THE AMAZING VAGINA WOMAN!
I understand the heroin, baggies, pills and cash dollah bills, but how desperate an addict do you have to be to go ahead and put the coins up there too?
(h/t Butcher’s Dog)
9. My favorite headline today:
If that’s a burp, I don’t want to be anywhere near a mine fart or, God forbid, a mine shart.
10. Gushing Mine Shart would make a great band name.