Random n’at

1. Remember when Fahrvergnügen was a thing?

Here’s something else I wonder if it’s still a thing — The Pittsburgh Power.

Is it terrible that it’s already fallen off of my radar after such an enjoyable franchise opener?

Here’s something else I wonder — do you think Brett Favre calls his penis Fahrvergnugen?

These are my deep thoughts for the day. The remainder of my thoughts will be much sillier.

2. Ben Roethlisberger granted an interview to Ed Bouchette about his upcoming nuptials and I know because my Google reader exploded with all kinds of news items from all over the country because BEN ROETHLISBERGER IS TALKING ABOUT HIS UPCOMING WEDDING.

This is Big News.

ESPN’s take:

Morning take: Roethlisberger’s wedding will take place on July 23, which is one week before Pittsburgh’s training camp. This is another step in the right direction after two tough years for Roethlisberger off the field.

Man, that almost sounds like they’re calling it a PR move.

Farrior says he was surprised to hear Ben got engaged.

I heard he was dating a girl. When I heard they were getting married, I guess they were dating longer than I thought.”

And they were. They’ve been dating on and off since 2005, according to Ben.

Goodness. He has found himself one tolerant chickadee.


Guests will be asked not to bring gifts but make donations to Mr. Roethlisberger’s foundation. He will give any gifts to Ronald McDonald House and Children’s Hospital of Pittsburgh of UPMC.

Now that’s the Duke of Fug and Earl of Gross I’ve come to love/hate. Always doing something to climb up a notch on my list. Bravo!

3. Do you know what happens when I start a post in the morning asking if the Pittsburgh Power is still a thing? I come back in the evening to finish it and voila! The Pittsburgh Power is still a thing!

Pittsburgh Power cornerback and former University of Pittsburgh football player Bernard Josh Lay Jr. has been charged with drug offenses in Aliquippa.

[golf clap]

4. Next time someone disses the Burgh all, “It’s in the middle of NOWHERE and nothing ever happens there but corn-shucking and errant goat-chasing,” you can respond with, “Yeah. SO’S YOUR MOTHER.”

Wait. No.

You can respond with, “Yeah, well, Pittsburgh recently set the flotilla world record.”

If you’re brave, follow that up with a booyah, and the definition of flotilla.

5. Wiz Khalifa is Pittsburgh’s no more, in a sense. He’s truly hit the big time with his major label debut Rolling Papers. A recent Spin review of a concert included, “Khalifa’s perseverance had paid off, and he was taking his star turn with the same casual charm with which he’d hand-built his career.”

However, Pittsburgh’s Mac Miller was afforded no such kindness:

Miller’s beats are flimsy, his rhymes elementary, the sort of cliché windmill you’d expect from a scrawny white kid who seems to subsist only on weed, cereal, and cartoons.


6. Soon, Internet. Soon.


It’s funny for about three pictures, then you start to worry about nightmares. Then you see the pigeon.

Then you poop your pants. Amen.

(h/t Mike the Butler Woycheck)

7. Wexford’s own Christina Aguilera says Pittsburgh didn’t nurture the arts when she was growing up:

Where I grew up, it’s a very sports-driven town, which, if you’re there, you know. The town I came from was very sports-driven and there wasn’t a whole lot of support for the arts, in my experience. It wasn’t until I went to, I think, the Mickey Mouse Club where I was first able to, I felt, breathe as a kid who loved performing and singing … and dance.

OMG. Christina Aguilera just made a Pittsburgh < Mickey Mouse Club comparison, didn’t she?

I’m curious to know what those of you who work or perform in the arts here in Pittsburgh think of what she said.

8. First, if you’ve never seen it, go watch Roberto Clemente get his 3,000th hit.

YouTube Preview Image

Then click here to see an amazing tribute to that hit done in comic book format.

If they ever invent time travel, I’m going to go watch that hit happen.

And then I’m going to go back to when Satan was inventing the pigeon and I am going to bitchslap the test tube out of his hands.

Then I’m going to go back to when Satan was inventing the Check Engine Light and I’m going to throat punch that bastard.

[awkward Kung Fu time traveler moves]

I’m here to serve. You’re welcome.

(h/t Charles)


  1. Magnus Patris
    April 7, 2011 11:20 pm

    “Nuptials” sounds dirty; tee hee.

    Also, thank you Aliquippa for making Ambridge look like Shangri-la in comparison.

  2. MadMax
    April 7, 2011 11:40 pm

    My big question here is-

    How are you/ why are you, contemplating Bret Farves’ penis??

    Penis name????

    All is lost!!

  3. Ted
    April 8, 2011 6:42 am

    I think “X-tina” (that sounds cultural!!) is confusing “the arts” with “getting commercial fame for my boobs and also I can match pitch like a high schooler”.

    Pittsburgh has a tremendous arts scene – Warhol, the PSO, the CLO, all kinds of independent outlets for creativity. Yeah, it doesn’t have the clout that the House of Mouse may have, but I suggest visiting Heinz Hall to hear the PSO and realize we have a symphony in the top 6 in the nation – a symphony that sells out concerts in Mozart’s hometown year after year. Then tell me the ‘Burgh isn’t arts friendly.

  4. Ted
    April 8, 2011 7:05 am

    Also, sports and the arts are not mutually exclusive. My instrumental teachers were all huge Pittsburgh sports fans, and maybe if Christina had made it to a few more Pirates games as a kid, she wouldn’t have forgotten the words to the Star Spangled Banner!! Any drunk yinzer (said with love) can yodel along with that tune just before kickoff, I guarantee!

  5. YinzerInExile
    April 8, 2011 7:12 am

    *becomes Ted’s personal cheeering section*

    I will add: Xtina and I are roughly the same age. When I was in high school, I considered CAPA. Had she any inclination to develop herself beyond immediate commercial gratification, I suppose she could have, you know, done similar.

    Erm. I guess if, as a wee lass, you’re already hawking yourself for The Mouse, you’re probably not making decisions regarding arts education in Pittsburgh. Her loss. Perhaps if she’d stayed here, and engaged here, rather than running off to seek fame, she’d have discovered the “nurturing” she so claims to have desired.

    I think she’s got a great voice (I also happen to think she uses it stupidly, but that’s neither here nor there), but–and I freely admit this is snobbish–I don’t think Pittsburgh does the “develop young, boobalicious teenybopper pop starlets” very well, and I’m personally glad that she had to leave to find all that.

    Though I do wish she’d shut her yap about wanting something that she obviously didn’t look for and inexplicably didn’t trip over while actually living in PIttsburgh. Because I think most ‘Burghers will immediately recognize that she’s making excuses and perpetuating a stereotype about a city that she’s really never claimed her ties to, in the first place.

  6. windy city steel city
    April 8, 2011 7:50 am

    Here in The BC [Beaver County} we can also lay claim to Christina when she lived in Rochester. And goodie, we can also “lay” claim to Josh Lay of Aliquippa. At least we can be proud of Sean Miller rising to the top at Arizona hoops.

  7. SpudMom
    April 8, 2011 8:18 am

    OK, when Christina lived here, she went to North Allegheny school district. THEY HAVE A HUGE DRAMA/MUSICAL PROGRAM. They win Gene Kelly awards all the time. They put on productions that are practically professional. And yet she couldn’t find anyone to nurture her talent? You weren’t looking very hard, were you?

  8. Kristin
    April 8, 2011 8:18 am

    I guess Xtina never heard of the CLO Mini Stars or PMT or the umpteen theatre organizations who cast kids in their musical productions. Or Community Classes at Point Park. Or too many voice coaches, dance troupes and theatre schools to count. Or amazing high school musicals and the Gene Kelly Awards. Or, as previously mentioned, CAPA (both middle school and high school). But, you know, there just aren’t enough outlets to encourage kids who want to pursue the performing arts.

  9. Katy
    April 8, 2011 8:20 am

    to be fair to Christina, currently we are not doing all we could to support the arts in the public schools. This economic climate has caused huge layoffs from programs like the Manchester Craft Guild and other programs that previously provided arts support for low-income or general public school students. Music and art teachers are more likely to get the boot as the public schools make more room for the (also important!) math, reading, and other “core” curriculum.

  10. SpudMom
    April 8, 2011 8:23 am

    Katy, you have a fair point except that North Allegheny is a wealthy school district that doesn’t have that problem. North Allegheny HIgh School has plenty of money to support the arts – and they freely spend it on the arts.

  11. AB
    April 8, 2011 8:33 am

    Pretty sure that’s an African Grey parrot and not a pigeon. But not sure how you feel about those…


  12. ajm
    April 8, 2011 8:53 am

    Since when is what Christina Aguilera does for a living “art”?

  13. HorseShoeBend
    April 8, 2011 9:10 am

    Unrelated to post but…

    Having an ok morn w/ only 1 negative – Bob Smizik Blog…

    What a negative Nancy. There’s something there along the lines King of Fud/Earl of Gross for him and I know only one place that can make it happen – here. Wondering if you might temporarily self unite with this thing (I knwo it’s asking alot) in order to convince him to move away. My plan then calls for you to dump him (ununite?)on some remote island somehwere in the pacific without internet access.

    Just a thought. (I know I dont’ have to read his blog but I do – mainly to read comments opposed.)

    Thanks you for any consideration and possible help. Go Bucs!!!

  14. Jonathan
    April 8, 2011 9:17 am

    I was lucky enough to be with my dad, sitting in the front row, 3rd base line, when my hero hit his 3,000th. There’s a terrific Roberto Clemente Museum in Lawrenceville that showcases the collection of Duane Rieder, the world’s foremost collector of Clemente memorabilia, and a close friend of the Clemente family. Here’s an article I wrote about it: http://www.pittsburghmagazine.com/Pittsburgh-Magazine/August-2010/The-Great-One/

  15. Butcher's Dog
    April 8, 2011 9:43 am

    Add Shakespeare competition to the other arts venues mentioned already.

    X-tina is voicing, though, a common frustration shared among high school arts (mostly theatre that I know of) people. Time, effort, and resources are funnelled into programs (mostly high school musicals, I wish there were more straight plays done) but the grass always seems greener elsewhere. Because my school is so small and because I love both sports and theatre, I was my school’s athletic director and theatre director at the same time. I used to delight in wearing theatre-related shirts to athletic conference meetings and athletic-related shirts to State Thespian Conference activities. Consider it the adult version of pulling wings from flies.

  16. Mike
    April 8, 2011 10:13 am

    Pittsburgh strengths with regards to arts is all a matter of perspective. I spent 5 years performing in Austin, TX, which has a phenomenal music scene. Austin certainly can’t compete with Pittsburgh’s Opera, but Austin certainly has many, many more opportunities for those in the popular music industry, including performance, production, engineering, event planning, managing, etc. Austin’s market is phenomenal.

    As someone who grew up in western PA interested in music, I do have to agree that there’s a regional cultural bias that does not favor many, but not all, artistic interests. I have known several professionals who left for better opportunities.

    Pittsburgh’s affordable cost of living and historical neighborhoods would be considered an assest to many performing artists. Sadly, Pittsburgh’s cultural stakeholders do not have enough vision to connect the dots and take advantage of those assets. That does not mean those folks are not well-intentioned or hard working because it’s more than just a few… it take a village.

  17. YinzerInExile
    April 8, 2011 10:29 am

    There’s a difference between professional opportunities for popular artists and a “nurturing” environment for the arts. If you’re an artist, you’re interested in (though not necessarily banking on) all aspects of the arts. If you’re interested in raking in loot as a pop singer in the mold of Xtina or Britney, for example, then I agree that Pittsburgh probably isn’t the place to do that. But just because you can’t be a Mousketeer or Britney Spears in Pittsburgh, doesn’t mean that it doesn’t nurture the arts.

  18. Monty
    April 8, 2011 10:45 am

    I’m not sure how Brett refers to it, but I’m pretty sure his wife started calling it Fahvrefromherpoonen after the Sterger news hit.

  19. elysianfantasy
    April 8, 2011 10:53 am

    As someone who both performs and works for an arts organization, I have to agree with most everyone who has said that Pittsburgh is not the place for a pop career. However, if you’re a talented actor, dancer (and not that SYTYCD/ABDC stuff…that’s a different beast altogether), or more of a classical/Broadway singer, then there are more opportunities than you can realistically take advantage of. Not to mention how much the city actually nurtures and welcomes opportunities for people to experience art. The Trust’s Broadway Across America series (which is part of a larger conglomeration) is one of the highest grossing in the entire country, and the Pittsburgh Symphony is a top 10 orchestra. Venues for visual artists are all over the place! It’s not like she didn’t have ample opportunity to see world class performances while she was here. Oh yeah, that’s right…she was worshipping at the altar of Disney.

    Most of us know about the terrible state that arts education is in. But as SpudMom rightly pointed out, North Allegheny is not one of the school districts that’s hurting. Xtina could have used this as a platform to advocate for arts education, but instead she chose to be passive aggressive about her Pittsburgh experience. Which according to a few friends of mine who went to school with her, she brought all on herself by being a royal bee-yotch and expecting people to kiss her arse.

  20. Me
    April 8, 2011 10:54 am

    Monty FTW!

  21. bucdaddy
    April 8, 2011 11:03 am

    To paraphrase one of my favorite headlines:

    Semi-famous singer dumps on the ‘Burgh


  22. Chris
    April 8, 2011 11:20 am

    I agree with previous posters regarding X-tina. I am also a North Allegheny graduate (1985), as are my 3 younger siblings. North Allegheny had then and still has very strong band/choral/theatre programs that are widely supported by students and teachers alike. It was one of the few schools where being a “band-geek” was actually kind of cool.

  23. JennyMoon
    April 8, 2011 12:28 pm


  24. Margie
    April 8, 2011 12:39 pm

    I thought she was home schooled? Even so, she could have taken advantage of the programs that NA offered.

    My thoughts are, life is what you make it, if she didn’t take advantage of all that was offered, shame on her.

  25. unsatisfied
    April 8, 2011 12:50 pm

    I wish that I could have been at clemente’s 3,000 hit game, too…..

    of course, we could have had our choice of seat. only a little over 13,000 showed up that day.

    unreal, huh?

    and, the bucs were a 1st place team.

    this current team of succos couldn’t get to 3,000 hits in a lifetime combined.

  26. Pensgirl
    April 8, 2011 1:53 pm

    I’m sure I’m not the only one ranting, but I’m too wound up to read all the other comments.

    Christina Aguilera is full of shit. School programs, the CLO, CAPA, the gazillion classes offered at the PITTSBURGH CENTER FOR THE MOTHERFUCKING ARTS (and yes, that should be made into its official name), the symphony, the Glass Center, the museums, the Kelly Awards (which directly encourage scholastic theater programs)…whether you want to appreciate, learn, or perform them, the arts are everywhere in Pittsburgh.

    And I would know that arts cultivation was alive and well in the 80s and 90s, being that I participated in them, with encouragement from my parents as well as many of those I listed above. Whether everyone can afford to partake of many of those offerings is a valid question. But to say no arts support exists at all is ignorant and just plain wrong.

  27. Dan (Not Onorato)
    April 8, 2011 2:05 pm

    A few things…

    “Throat punch that bastard” is probably one of my favorite quotes.

    Agreed…Monty FTW

    Pensgirl…easy now…is she really worth getting upset over? SRSLY?

  28. bucdaddy
    April 8, 2011 2:24 pm

    Mrs. Daddy and I and our mothers spent a very nice afternoon at Phipps on Sunday. I didn’t see X Aguilera anywhere, but I did see a Stinkytoe plant. Kind of the same thing.

  29. Butcher's Dog
    April 8, 2011 4:37 pm

    I’ll help Pensgirl paint the new sign for the center. Just sayin’.

  30. lisa
    April 8, 2011 6:30 pm

    Most of the time, the check engine light is nothing more than an oxygen sensor, which doesnt effect the running of the car. I have had my light on for a year, my husband works in the car industry,thus the fact that my car still needs worked on…

  31. VAgirl
    April 8, 2011 7:11 pm

    My-oh my this love hate relationship with x-tina. I was under the impression that P-burgh is developing more programs for the arts and youth. Does anyone know what is happening with the Gene Kelleys statue? That is a comparison. How long has that been in the planning stages and if it was sports figure it probably would have been up years ago. I bet if Hines Ward wins the mirror ball trophy he’ll have one up before Mr. Kelley!
    Planning on visiting the Roberto Clemente museum soon.

  32. Julie
    April 8, 2011 8:06 pm

    Wow, there are a lot of Christina haters on here! I’m not what you would call a fan – although I don’t mind a couple of her songs – but it sounds like people are bashing her for finding opportunities elsewhere. I remember reading somewhere many years ago that her high school wasn’t very welcoming of her, especially when she made her first album. In fact, there are reports of the other kids being downright mean to her. So, yeah, if you’re miserable in your home town and people won’t talk to you (may I remind you that when you’re in high school, your social life and your self esteem can be one in the same), you’re probably not going to wanna stick around to find the cool stuff this city does have to offer. Come on, guys. I don’t think she was ‘bashing’ Pittsburgh at all, she was talking about her own personal experience. Why are we sitting here bashing her for finding a better life somewhere else?

  33. Janelle
    April 9, 2011 9:10 am

    If I could find the arts and music in Fayette County – and great opportunities at that – Christina could’ve found it in Pittsburgh, which plenty of people have already wonderfully pointed out.

  34. LaReina
    April 9, 2011 12:19 pm

    Those interested in Clemente’s 3,000th hit also might be interested in the movie about two boys’ journey to Pittsburgh to see it happen: “Chasing 3000” (written by a Buccos fan from Steubenville).

  35. YinzerInExile
    April 9, 2011 1:19 pm

    I don’t see anyone bashing Xtina. I *do* see people miffed that, if she was giving a personal account of how she personally found Pittsburgh when she was here, she never indicated as much. It’s a simple phrase to add to the beginning to a soundbyte/media clip: “In my experience.” Instead, she just broad-brushed the city because she was too lazy/indifferent to look for the opportunities and support, here, that she claimed she wanted.

    And, honestly, as someone who grew up heavily involved with music and the arts, I’ve got a bit of a chip on my shoulder that someone who claims to be an “artist,” and makes a living as an “artist,” couldn’t be bothered to look for it when *in my experience* one needn’t have even looked that hard.

  36. facie
    April 9, 2011 3:25 pm

    Did anyone mention Gemini Children’s Theatre or PMT’s kids’ program (Rauh Conservatory)? Maybe they were not around when Christina was a kid? I will say this, years ago I watched “Behind the Music” (or whatever the other like-minded one is called) specials about Christina and Britney. It seemed that Brit was embraced by her peers, whereas Christina was shunned. I don’t think she is super fond of the area, and I can kind of see why.

  37. bucdaddy
    April 9, 2011 4:36 pm

    People tell me Aguilera has a great gift and uses it to make shitty pop music.

    That’s reason enough for me.

  38. LaReina
    April 9, 2011 6:34 pm

    That sums it up, bucdaddy.

  39. kayaker
    April 10, 2011 1:00 pm

    OK, so like um how could Christina like have dropped names like Britany or like Justin if she like admitted she had like support in the arts here? Apparently she like learned everything like singing and like performing from like those kind of kids?

    I don’t question that girl learned something from somewhere. I just wish she had learned more while she was here, loyalty, gratitude, National Anthem… I just think she has a whole lot more to learn.
    All I can say to her at this point is “get up, rub some dirt on it, keep playing or shut up”.