Internet, on a scale of one to impossible, how hard would it be for me to steal this Gotham Times newspaper dispenser for my home office?

I’m asking for a friend.

the gotham times


Also, does anyone have a dolly I can borrow? And a batmask? And a cape?

For a friend.

When you hear on the news that someone dressed as Batman stole the Gotham Times newspaper dispenser and drove off in a momdorkmobile, it totally wasn’t me.

It was probably that Petunia Desperado.

That bitch has balls.

[swishes cape and runs off in dramatic fashion]


  1. bluzdude
    August 16, 2011 10:35 am

    Someone has GOT to get you a cape to run around and swish in… or is that ‘swish around and run’?

  2. G-Man
    August 16, 2011 10:56 am

    To hell with the newspaper dispenser. Where is that Nathan’s Hot Dog place? I’m coming to the ‘burgh next week and I want a Nathan’s Hot Dog. Maybe you can read about me eating it in the Gotham Times.

  3. Crazy Hat Bitch
    August 16, 2011 11:49 am

    Need a van to pull up next to it, have someone inside to assist in putting it in the van. Should only take a couple minutes!

  4. DG
    August 16, 2011 1:02 pm

    How about a Batgirl costume with a cape? That I can hook you up with.

  5. jmarie1973
    August 16, 2011 1:17 pm

    Gman- the nathan’s hot dogs is @ 305 Wood Street. Open 7am to 7pm.

  6. Butcher's Dog
    August 16, 2011 1:36 pm

    Hot dogs at 7 AM. Is this a great country or what?

  7. G-Man
    August 16, 2011 2:23 pm

    jmarie –
    Thanks. Here in Richmond, the only Nathan’s Hot Dogs are at Bruster’s Ice Cream shops or Sam’s Club. Neither of those have that homey Coney Island feel. :-)

  8. tehamy
    August 16, 2011 2:36 pm

    I believe that @scarletfire has a Bat Girl mask that she would be willing to lend you.

  9. red pen mama
    August 16, 2011 3:32 pm

    I also believe that @burghbaby is working on Ginny’s cape, bluzdude.

  10. bluzdude
    August 16, 2011 8:25 pm

    There’s a cape in the works? I’d pay $20.00 to see a picture of Ginny swishing her cape and running off. Hey, maybe she can make it a .gif file and post it whenever it applies. (Until it stops being “a thing” anyway…)

    There… I’m paid upfront.

  11. Kent
    August 17, 2011 9:38 am

    G-Man – If you really want a good hot dog with ‘burgh personality go to Franktuary. You will not be disappointed.

  12. Maniac
    August 18, 2011 10:00 pm

    Those aren’t that hard to steal. We had The Onion one in our classroom in High School……..granted it’s heavy to carry and hard to run with up 7 flights of stairs without alerting the security guards that actually cared about the rules but we did it. =D