Lots I need to write about on this dreary (but I kinda love it) day. Brett Keisel town hall, the City That Took Itself To Court which is not a children’s book, slutty referee, and more. I’ll get to that this afternoon.
For now, you can go read my November column over at Pittsburgh Magazine, this one telling you the story of the incredible act of heroics I witnessed in downtown Pittsburgh one night this summer when a ragtag group of random Burghers took off running after a purse thief, leaving stunned companions in their wakes. Internet, I honestly was not expecting the heroes I found that night. I was expecting Joe Manganiello in a cape. Not Ted in Dockers. But Ted in Dockers saved the day.
It was a thing to behold and you gotta go see how it ends.
I hesitantly approached the group of men. “Ted? Is Ted here? Ted?” That’s what I was saying out loud, but inside I was thinking, He’s a spring chicken. Probably wearing running shoes, unless he’s one of those ultra-marathoner types who doesn’t wear shoes. He’s probably a trained sprinter. Maybe a gold-medal hurdler. Possibly checking his pulse to ensure he’s reached his optimal heart rate. Maybe he’s running laps of the plaza to cool down. Maybe stepped into a phone booth without explanation.
I hope Ted happens upon the column and realizes that what he did was a wonderfully Burghy thing to do.
Also, BEST PATRICK NEIL ILLUSTRATION EVER!
[awkward kung fu moves]