“Free your fursona”

I love the Furries.

There are furries on Twitter and non-furries on Twitter who hate me because they think I hate the Furries because I like to point out the ludicrousness that SOME of the furry population engages in, whether it be a particularly awful fursuit or questionable litter box behavior.

It’s sort of like how I make fun of SOME Steelers (Skippy Skeeve, Santonio Holmes, The Duke of Fug) but I love the Steelers as a whole.

That said, I’m about to get some more people hating me because I just discovered that local comedian Gab Bonesso, who used to hate me with sunfire but now I think we’re cool and maybe she only hates me with candlefire, pissed off some furries after she performed for a group of them last year. How much did she piss them off? She has dedicated a blog to the hate mail she has received from furries and well, I had to share with you!

Some awesome snippets from the hate mail she’s received:

We wear the animal costume or “our true skin” to feel natural. The way GOD intended us to be. He told Eve not to talk to the Serpent, but she did anyway. You know why? 

talking to animals is truth.

God knew it.

See, you and all the other “haters” will find out on Judgement Day.

The serpent was/is GOD.

We are animals.

Talking to animals is truth? Then Dr. Doolittle must be Jesus.

Haha, even furries dislike you, that should tell you something.
You probably don’t even know what it’s like to have sex with a tail?
Your a joke.

Too bad you can’t tell them.
Looser!

And this one is pretty awesome:

furries can connect with who they truly are, the animal inside. if youre hating them, youre hating their fursona, youre hurting the feelings of their inner self! and youre hurting your own fursona! stop neglecting him, let him free, embrace him, keep him company, and he will do the same in return! you are your fursona, and he is you, youre only hurting yourself by hating and abusing the most selfless and loving people who are furries, they are true humans. true representations of what everyone is inside.

There’s a hate word used early on in that particular letter that I didn’t use here because it just sounds so awful: skinf**.

I support Gab’s blog because if I received awesome hatemail like this, I’d blast it to the world for enjoyment too.

This seems like a good time to bust out, once again, the Anthrocon clip from the Pittsburgh-based comedy “Back to You.”

YouTube Preview Image

Nailed it!





9 Comments

  1. LaReina
    November 11, 2011 4:54 pm

    Dear furries: You people are f’in nuts. Hate on that.



  2. Gab
    November 11, 2011 5:46 pm

    Thanks for the shout-out! By the way, I never really hated you. I was just being a stupid twenty-something attempting to be provocative. And frankly, I don’t hate the furry community. I was trying to reach out to them and it back fired. Big time. Oh well. Their letters are like “found art”. I just post them and let others enjoy their insanity/fursona!

    Thanks again!



  3. Clementine
    November 11, 2011 8:14 pm

    All my friends are so excited for the NEW fashion line from Hittsburgh called Fursona! :) It’s made right here in town by one girl in an apartment on the North Side. She puts an electric shaver and a thong in a box and sells it for super cheap… you can wear the thong in so many different ways and just shave around it and your man and your pets and stray dogs and rabid raccoons will get sooo excited! Super-cute! Kick-ass! Turds! (Oops, my Furries aren’t housebroken. But they are super sexy in Fursona!)



  4. Butcher's Dog
    November 12, 2011 8:49 am

    Well played, Clementine. Well played.



  5. Vannevar
    November 12, 2011 9:07 am

    I wonder. Does Craigslist have a Fursonals section?



  6. unsatisfied
    November 12, 2011 10:42 am

    that “back to you” clip? never not funny.

    also, furries….never not funny.



  7. Rachel
    November 13, 2011 10:19 pm

    I’m still trying to wrap my head around skinf**.



  8. Oswald Van Ooster
    November 13, 2011 11:19 pm

    I have to wonder, why do such things matter to you?



  9. ThreeDawg
    December 31, 2011 4:38 am

    There are three catagories of furries.

    The first, are the Bawww’ers. They cry about everything, trying to get attention via suicidal threats.

    The second, are the nutjobs. They seem to believe that they are their animal, while in reality, they need to be in the closest mental hospital.

    The third, and most rare, are the ones whom have, by some slim chance, have held onto their mental, and cognitive abilities. These are the ones who know its not a lifestyle, nor a hobby. These are the ones who know how to take a joke. These are the ones who take criticism, and build upon it, making sure they dont make the same mistake twice. These are the ones that are at least slightly acceptable by social standards.

    I am very glad to say, I am probably one of the ones in the third party.

    Now whittling this down to a point, I would like to say, yes we do have our freaks. Our own ‘ Judases ‘. Try focusing on those in the third party, instead of those whom stick out for attention. It will work out better for everyone.

    And before I leave, may I say I got a good laugh out of some of those emails. Those people really need to get back on their meds.