Monthly Archives: November 2011

The State of Sexhair’s Nose

A picture snapped an hour ago and a note from my brother-in-law, Muchacho, this fine morning:

“His nose is fine, ladies.”

Whew. What a badass.

P.S. If you missed it, Kris Letang’s nose was basically removed from his nose region, placed on his cheek, and then shifted back to his nose region. Video here. 

P.P.S. You know you’re getting old when you see that happen and instead of getting all “Sexhair got hurt. I should like to lovingly comfort Sexhair while surrounded by candlelight, resting his boo-boo on my bosom” you get all “[MAMA BEAR ROAR] I WILL RIP THE THROAT OUT OF THE ASSHOLE WHO MADE THAT POOR KID BLEED!”

P.P.P.S. Bonus points to the ladies who went to BOTH of those places in the space of ten seconds.


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A Lightning Cyber Monday Pittsburgh Shirt Giveaway and Bonus Discount Code!

This is the second year now that I’ve done about 95% of my Christmas shopping online (Amazon.com is all “SAY MY NAME, BITCH.”) and I love it. Less stressful. Less punch-inducing. Less LOOK AT THAT HEADLESS CHICKEN RUNNING AROUND SCREAMING SOMETHING ABOUT BAKUGANS AND CALICO CRITTERS (WHICH IS ODD BECAUSE IT DOESN’T HAVE A HEAD)!

Saturday was for small businesses and today, Monday, is for online businesses.

Pittsburgh has some online businesses you can support today via CyberMonday like:

Jupe Boutique: 30% off today

Commonwealth Press: $5 off your order with the code “cyber”

Steelers.com: 10% off your entire order

PostGazette.com: 20% off everything with code “cyber20”

In addition, Fresh Factory, the Pittsburgh store that sells the softest Pirates raglan EVER (seriously, my husband lives in it) and the coolest vintage Mario Lemieux shirt, has two new designs, one of which I fell in love with and am giving away this Cyber Monday.

Masloff for Mayor!

 

What: One “Masloff for Mayor” shirt courtesy of Fresh Factory. Size chosen by winner.

To Enter: Leave a comment. Any comment will do, but so you have something to say, let’s take a little poll and you tell me what percentage of your holiday shopping you plan to do or have already done online versus in physical stores. I already told you I’m up to 95% this year.

One comment per valid email address and this is a FAST giveaway because you only have until 7:00 p.m. this Cyber Monday to enter at which time Random.org will choose a winner.

If you don’t win or if you want to purchase gifts on Fresh Factory (LOTS of awesome Burgh shirts), use code “PGH20” for 20% off! 

Good luck!

Fine print: This is not a paid giveaway. I just love Fresh Factory’s shirts! And I love you! FINGERHEARTS! BAKUGANS! CALICO CRITTERS!


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Fire

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thanksgiving Hiatus. Schmanksgiving Schmiatus.

Sid came back and dear Lord, what in the hell was that?

Scoring on his first shot since January? What even? Who even does that?! Are we stuck in a Disney movie called Miracle 2? If so, can I play his girlfriend who stands by his side through the toughest of post-injury times even when he pushes me away, and then when he wins the Stanley Cup instead of hoisting the cup in the air, he skates to me and picks me up and skates around the ice and weeping people throw roses and then he trips over the roses and we fall to the ice and I say through my fat bloody lip, “We forgot about the flowers,” and …

If you don’t get that reference you need to leave immediately. I can’t even look at you.

Where were we?

When I heard Sid was coming back, I hoped for the best (Ten goals. Three assists. Fire shooting from his skates and his heart. Maybe at one point, a triple axle/triple toe combo.) but I honestly prepared myself for the worst. (He’s been out for almost a year.  He could trip over his own skates or a particularly aggressive chip in the ice. He might have to take oxygen between shifts. He might be slow or scared. Concussion shy. Maybe his concussion symptoms will suddenly flare up again and he’ll realize he can’t ever play hockey again and the entire city of Pittsburgh will fling itself from the roof of the Consol while UPMC and Highmark just stay up there trying to punch each other’s light outs.)

I needn’t have worried. He scored on his first shot. I replayed it at least 20 times, but you can never get back that elation of seeing it for the first time live.

He did skate with fire. He wasn’t scared. He wasn’t shy. He wasn’t slow. He was who he was and continues to be.

Ours.

Suck it, haters.

P.S. Go read what my colleague at Pittsburgh Magazine Sean Conboy wrote about Sidney Crosby. Trust me. It’s a must read.


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Without comment

Video by the amazingly talented Benstonium crew:

Okay, one comment: When Sid takes the ice tonight, I’m either going to cry or pee myself a little. Either/or.


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Short little Random n’at

1. I’ll be taking all of next week off from this blog so I can enjoy my family and work on my magazine column.

Please have yourselves the best Thanksgiving you can before the jingle-bell madness of the holiday season is thrust upon us.

2. Tonight begins Light Up Night! If you’re looking to enjoy Light Up Night and donate to a great cause at the same time, you’ll want to hit Stage AE for their party featuring local band Moscow Mule. Randy Baumann will also be in the house as well as various Steelers. The event raises money for Variety The Children’s Charity.

Other details:

– Live band, ample adult beverages, and free food
– Private outdoor vantage point for the Light Up Night fireworks
– Easy parking on the North Shore
– Cool silent auction and Chinese auction items
– Support a tremendous local charity and support disabled children in Western PA
– It’s only $25 if you order tickets online. $30 at the door.

Clicky the linky!

3. Ricky Burgess, the city councilman who also teaches at CCAC, was accused via fliers posted on campus of trading grades for sex. He has adamantly denied the accusations while the police investigate. That said:

Marty Griffin: “Have you ever had a sexual relationship with a student?”

Ricky Burgess: “I did not do this. I have not engaged in these kind of activities or behaviors.”

Griffin: “Have you ever had a sexual relationship with a student?”

Burgess: “I did not do this.”

Griffin: “You’re not answering my question.”

Burgess: “No – I did not do this! No I have not! No!”

Griffin: “You have not had a sexual relationship with a student?”

Burgess: “No!”

Griffin: “Ever?”

Burgess: “Ever.”

That’s just a freaking odd way to answer the question.

4. Instructions for hacking an electronic roadside sign!

You know what to do.

“I rock my Hittsburgh gear to the fullest.”

(h/t @mrscrappy)

5. Twenty dollars is all it takes to meet my self-united husband True Blood’s Joe Manganiello at a WPXI event hosted at Dave and Busters, benefiting the Steel Valley Salvation Army.

I permit you to go and I also permit you to step off if you go.

(h/t Tara)

6. Have a great Thanksgiving!

 

 


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