That's Church

1. A conversation with my father:

Dad: “Mom and I have a bunch of pictures from Aruba.”

Me: “Cool.”

Dad: “We want to make a photobook.”

Me: “Shutterfly is the best. I’ve tried them all. Shutterfly is the easiest by far.”

Dad: “Do you just upload your pictures?”

Me: “Yeah and then it will sort of throw them all into a book in chornological order and you can edit them and stuff. Super easy.”

Dad: “You might have to walk us through it.”

Me: “Okay.”

Dad: “Actually, you’ll probably need to carry us.”

Me: [blink]

Dad: “Actually, you’ll probably just need to do it for us.”

So that’s what I’m doing tomorrow night.

2. The Thirteen Deaths of Cooey the Pigeon as sent to me by Michelle the Knitting Lady!

Death by Thud is my favorite and has given me a GENIUS idea to start whipping hockey pucks at pigeons in Market Square.

3. Speaking of Market Square, I’ve come up with a brilliant plan to try to use a parking chair in the square this winter. I’ll let you know how it goes.

4. Reader Nancy’s Jack Rabbit pic showing her double-dip-bopped kiddo:

Woo that child is AIRBORNE. Whoever described the seat belts as “dog leashes” hit that nail on the head.

Love it. Send me more, Internet!

5. The Lockes, a husband and wife team who lost their mothers to cancer are in their tenth year of an event benefiting the American Cancer Society. They’re hoping to make the tenth year their best yet.

Saturday November 12, 2011 at 7:oo p.m. at Finnigan’s Wake. $20 at the door gets you appetizers, two draft beers and a long-sleeved shirt.  Plus 50/50 drawings, raffle, auction and more.

Details here!

6. I don’t remember much about my senior prom, but the picture the photographer took on the Gateway Clipper that night is full of dork-win. I will share it with you in the next round of Make Room for Kids fundraising.

If your prom sucked, you can do it all over WITH BOOZE at Literazzi’s Prom 2012 benefiting the Greater Pittsburgh Literacy Council!

November 11, Literazzi brings you the prom you always wanted… where the booze is legal, the music doesn’t stop until the wee hours, and you have much better hair than the first time around. Have your picture taken by Nerds Behind the Lens, put on something fancy and spike the punch. The chaperones won’t mind.

I love it! Tickets here!

7. The Mario Lemieux Foundation’s Bid for 66 is now live with a crap-ton of awesome autographed items up for bid, all benefiting Austin’s Playroom Project of which Make Room for Kids is a program.

Items and game-used items are available and signed by people such as Mario, Sid, Marc-Andre and more!

8. You may have seen a lot of things in your life, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkey fly. I mean, I bet you’ve never seen a senior citizen flash mob like the one those crazy kids over at Asbury Heights did over Halloween.

I love it! I have seen the future of flash mobs and this is it.

Or dog flash mobs.

Either or.

(h/t Stephanie)

Here’s couch-jump worthy Katie Holmes on Regis yesterday and if you start at 1:45, you’ll see the part where she volunteers up that she loves Pittsburgh.

Also, do you ever wonder if Tom’s inner circle is able to joke with him about the whole couch jumping thing?

I hope so.

“Tom. Here’s the costume for the next scene. Do you love it? I mean, like, would you jump on a couch for it?”

“Tom. I have the best news. Wait until you hear this. You’re going to want to jump on a couch, man.”

“Tom. If I lit my porch couch on fire, would you jump on it to put it out for me?”

I got a million of these.

But the point: Katie Holmes loves Pittsburgh.

I bet some of you don’t know who John Meyer is. He’s a sports reporter at WTAE and I met him over the summer, or wait, last summer? Woy? I can’t remember. Anyway, he and I were both presenters at Media Career Day at Kennywood. He talked about working in sports. I talked about blogging about self-united husbands. Reach for the stars!

John is awesome. Seriously. Charming. Easy to talk to. Sincere. We like him.

John and the rest of the morning team wagered with a Baltimore station to wear purple if the Steelers lost to the Ravens:

Those crazy folks over at WBAL laid on the smack talk with WTAE in Pittsburgh and forced their morning show to wear purple after the Ravens beat the Steelers in week nine.  Of the three reporters, news anchor Wendy Bell wore a purple blouse, Kelly Frey a black blouse and John Meyer, the sports guy not the whiny singer, wore a suit with what he called “purple pinstripes.”  I didn’t see them.

Okay, first, that’s not Wendy Bell. That’s Michelle Wright.

Second, Kelly Frey is clearly wearing a purple blazer thingy over the black blouse.

Third, yeah, John Meyer, NOT WEARING PURPLE.

I love his explanation that the pinstripes in his suit are purple. Nice try, John. Like smacking a piece of red lint onto a yellow dress and calling it red.

Also, some gems from the comments:

I like to think our fanbase is classier than our opponents.

[falls down laughing]

You open mouth and accept the challenge, and refuse to step up and pay your dues. Pittsburgh is a proud town with very loyal fans. What a shame your station lack integrity, we respect the Steelers, by not your station. Woossie……

Is Woossie the Wookie Chewbacca’s wife?

Ravens fans are better than berating some local schmuck because he didn’t wear enough purple. Let him be the small-minded coward.

I sent a note to the station and suggested that the welcher, Meyer, make a donation to a Baltimore homeless shelter or other charity for the holiday season, if he’s not man enough to own up to his bets.

Stop saying “welcher”, it is “rascist” to the people of Wales.

I love the “Internet.”

I have never heard of Hittsburgh clothing until this weekend.

The description:

Hittsburgh™ – more than a label, more than a brand, more than the legendary city of champions. It’s a state of mind. It’s an attitude, a swagger, a confidence that was born of pride in a hard day’s work, a resilient spirit that knows no other way but to get back up in and face of whatever may try to knock us down. From the bite of winter wind off the rivers, to chains on a factory gate, we survive and we thrive. Hittsburgh™ – is something that you carry in your heart no matter where you live or where you go. It’s a part of who you are and you a part of it. Forever. The city made of steel, the people made of heart… Hittsburgh™

I actually kinda like that.

Here are some of their products featured on their Facebook page as photographed by Sean Davies:

Everything has a 92 on it and James Harrison’s signature, so I guess he has officially endorsed them.

Also, endorsed by Lukey as these images from a Steelers Hittsburgh tailgate show:

We either have the coolest mayor of any major metropolitan city, or the most poorly advised.

Also, no, the irony is not lost on me that the desription of their business is all factory gates and chains and steel and hard work and sweat and tears and blue collar and gritted teeth, but their featured images are all basically, well, stripper wear.

But in their defense, strippers sweat too.

(h/t to the two guys that sent it to me. Lost the emails in the abyss of my inbox)

Sorry no WTRT yesterday. I really wasn’t in a good frame of mind to be funny or witty because the whole PSU debacle really punched me in the gut, and I think I took it especially hard because I have a son the same age as those who were assaulted. One thing this has done is made me very motivated to regularly talk to him about what to do if any adult, even an adult he trusts, were to try to do something that makes him uncomfortable.

That said, here are some pictures from my camera phone that I never shared!

1. New artwork has appeared on Gist Street in the Hill District. If you haven’t ever turned onto Gist from the Boulevard, I strongly suggest you do it and check out the amazing things you’ll see in a one block stretch of street.

2. This is what female equestrians wear on Mexican telenovelas.

So you see why they’re so popular.

3. A sign on a Route 30 transmission shop that makes me chuckle every time:

4.  I can’t for the life of me figure out how they determined which letters to leave out and which left out letters got replaced with apostrophes.

I mean, what about the D in “sandwich?”  They took it out but there’s no apostrophe! And why take the E out of “Sealer” but leave it in “Decruster?”

The grammar tutor in me is having a brain aneurysm.

I just spelled aneurysm right on the first try. [back pat]

And don’t even get me started on the capitalization or I will punch a dictionary.

5. This is Ray Brooks, the effervescent (spelled it right the first time!) Just Ducky tour guide who tried to kill me by letting a baby drive the boat:

A BABY!

6. Only in Pittsburgh. There are TWO Pittsburghese things in this awesome sign hanging at my local post office. See if you can find both:

More later, including a post about Hizzoner Master Lukey of Juice Box Dojo.