Random n’at.

1. My father, who retired after 35 years as an engineer from US Steel a few years ago, is currently back to work a few days a week on a consulting basis and yesterday, he wore two VERY different shoes to work.

He said it was a sign that he was officially elderly.

But then us girls all chimed in about how we regularly wear our clothes inside-out or backwards, or in the case of Tina Fey one time at college, BOTH inside out and backwards (you’d think she’d notice the tag tickling her chin).

He feels better now.

2. Goodbye, Paul Maholm.

I had fun cheering you on.

You’re going to regret leaving Pittsburgh because THIS IS THE YEAR!

Oh, yes. I went there.

[awkward kung fu moves]

3. Jamie and Ali are coming up on the second anniversary of the earthquake, so this is a great time to remind you that they remain in Haiti, working hard to keep Haitian families whole.

Check out their new website to get acquainted with their work in providing daycare, healthcare, after-school programs, schooling and more to children at risk for being placed in orphanages.

4. A Love Actually proposal from Penn State.

I REALLY need to see that movie, don’t I?

(h/t Emily)

5. Miss America’s Pennsylvania representative is a Steelers fan.

YouTube Preview Image

All of the ladies had to make videos promoting themselves and almost every single one will make you fall down laughing. Such as:

YouTube Preview Image

I’m voting for Miss West Virginia. Srsly.

6. How ’bout them Pens? Five losses in a row.

We got no Crosby, no Staal, no Letang … OUR PETS’ HEADS ARE FALLING OFF!

Even the buildings around the Consol can’t take it anymore and are committing suicide.

Sad.

7. A Burgher is suing Panera:

A Panera Bread franchisee had a policy of keeping “fat, black or ugly” people off of the cash registers and out of management positions, according to a lawsuit filed in federal court today that seeks class action status.

Man. If you were fat, black, AND ugly, you were REALLY shit out of luck.

Having said that, I have never ever seen a fat person, a black person or an ugly person take my order at any of the local Paneras I visit, so there’s that. They are always young, adorable, white and thin.

8. Dear Troysus, welcome to the realization that flinging yourself into a live volcano would be safer than even MENTIONING something political on your public accounts.

Have you learned NOTHING FROM ME?!

9. KDKA’s Dave Crawley wrote a poem about the Steeler’s season. A snippet:

So let’s savor Hines Ward and his Ward’s Hall of Fame smile,
And the team that faced struggles with stoutness and style.
Which players return? Though we don’t really know,
They have reason to bask in a Black and Gold glow.

What a coincidence. I wrote a poem about the Steeler’s season too!

A haiku. Ahem.

Poop poop poop poop poop.

Poop poop poop poop poop poop poop.

Poop poop POOP POOP POOP!

That’s copyrighted. Don’t steal it, bitches.

 





31 Comments

  1. Scott
    January 11, 2012 11:50 am

    Do Americans not understand that a reverse peace sign is the equivalent of the middle finger?



  2. Virginia
    January 11, 2012 11:56 am

    Scott, the reverse peace sign is the equivalent of the middle finger in ENGLAND.

    This is simply Ali posing with a child.

    Not everything has to be a controversy.



  3. Scott
    January 11, 2012 12:03 pm

    Virginia, I think what Ali and her sister do is beyond fantastic. Plus she’s smoking hot. I’m not creating a controversy, I’m mentioning something conversationally.

    Sheesh.



  4. Scott
    January 11, 2012 12:08 pm

    “Not everything has to be a controversy.”

    That’s a hilarious comment coming from you.

    (Public Service Announcement: This is good natured humor. Do not freak out, overreact or enter a Pavlovian attack on the mayor. The proper response is a soft chuckle. Thank you.)



  5. empirechick
    January 11, 2012 12:21 pm

    One of the managers at my local Panera is black and she regularly works the cash register. Also, there are a couple portly guys on the food line. I won’t say which Panera so Sam Covelli doesn’t find out when he reads this blog.



  6. Noelle
    January 11, 2012 12:24 pm

    I thought your dad was a minister?



  7. Virginia
    January 11, 2012 12:25 pm

    He is both. HAH!



  8. TK
    January 11, 2012 12:33 pm

    1.) The fingers have to be upright and moving upward for it to be “the finger”.

    2.) Your father should right a checklist he checks when he gets in his car, such as:

    A.) Am I in my underwear, Y or N?
    B.) Does my shirt have a collar, Y or N? (Second chance to make sure he’s not in his undershirt)
    C.) Have I shaved, Y or N?
    D.) Have I brushed my teeth, Y or N?
    E.) Do I have my wallet on me, Y or N?
    F.) Do I have a belt on, Y or N?
    G.) Do my shoes match, Y or N? (No need to look at the socks, no one else does)



  9. TK
    January 11, 2012 12:33 pm

    He should write a checklist (not sure what right a checklist is).



  10. facie
    January 11, 2012 12:35 pm

    This summer I wore two different black shoes that looked NOTHING alike. I did not realize it until I had gotten out of my car and was walking towards a restaurant. I was not even 40 yet. But it gave everyone at the table a good laugh.

    Go, Jamie and Ali!



  11. Rich D
    January 11, 2012 12:55 pm

    @Ginny’s Dad – Last year I wore 2 completely different shoes to work, a white tennis shoe and a black casual shoe. I noticed it when I sat down at my desk. I considered covering it by saying I hurt my foot, but owned up to it and took the razzing like a man. At work, they now call me “Richie-two-shoes”.



  12. Rachel
    January 11, 2012 1:00 pm

    My mom wore 2 different shoes to jury duty once… one had the toe cut out, the other, not so much. She always says the defense took one look at her and thought, this woman can’t decide what shoes to wear, we’re sure as heck not going to let her decide someone’s life or death!

    Of course, she still blames my dad to this day



  13. jenn
    January 11, 2012 1:11 pm

    I have eliminated the shoe screwup by leaving all dress shoes that I wear there in boxes so i never do that again.

    however i am ready to put a checklist at the door to my store for my let’s call them older employees to use as they walk out.

    1)have you peed? (this apparently is number one i am learning. I’m not your parent. i’m not even your child. why do i have to remind them of bodily functions when they live 5 minutes away!)
    2)do you have your purse
    3)do you have your cigs
    4) do you have your keyes
    5) do you know where you parked

    etc – might too long of a list though. i just shake my head at all of them!



  14. Elle C.
    January 11, 2012 1:18 pm

    1. During the first week of my new job (I was 22) I wore cute knee high boots (which I owned in both brown and black) and wore one black and one brown. I didn’t notice until I walking through PPG at lunch time. I was mortified. So, yeah, it happens to all of us!
    4. TEAR! So sweet!! You definitely need to see Love Actually. One of my favorite movies of all time!



  15. BBandG
    January 11, 2012 1:19 pm

    +1 for the Dumb and Dumber reference



  16. Monty
    January 11, 2012 2:09 pm

    Jump, jump, you know, you should know that
    Tina Fey is not having anything today
    As we stand there totally krossed out
    We commence to make you…

    Jump, jump
    The Mac Fey will make you, jump, jump
    Daddy Fey will make you, jump, jump
    Tina Fey will make you jump, jump



  17. bucdaddy
    January 11, 2012 2:53 pm

    West by-God Virginia.



  18. Aileen
    January 11, 2012 3:18 pm

    Did anyone notice all the Steelers at last night’s Pens’ game?

    The FIRST guy they show is Casey Hampton as he’s gnawing on wings. I saw Harrison, Ziggy Hood and Brett Keisel in a Brooks Orpik jersey.



  19. Butcher's Dog
    January 11, 2012 3:51 pm

    Well, isn’t the standard response to radically different shoes, “I have another pair just like this at home”?



  20. Noelle
    January 11, 2012 6:55 pm

    Being a minister was like a 60 hour week for my dear ‘ole dad so I commend yours. But then, my dad was the senior pastor at a large church so he was kinda big cheese.



  21. suzie-Q
    January 11, 2012 8:03 pm

    I went on a job interview with my sweater on backwards, tag below my chin, and mismatched sox. I didn’t even notice til i got back to my office and a coworker asked in horror if I went to the interview dressed “LIKE THAT!!”.

    I got the job….not sure if I was that good, or if the interviewers were that desperate!!!



  22. Bram R
    January 11, 2012 9:46 pm

    Jami and Ali continue to rock, I give you points for picking great personal heroes.



  23. Tina Fey
    January 12, 2012 9:37 am

    Gin, if you’ve watched any movie with a glittery vampire and haven’t yet seen Love Actually, you need to be caned.



  24. KGC
    January 12, 2012 10:50 am

    @Ginny’s Dad..

    Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
    Answer: Tied shoes.

    I have more. A lot more. Like..
    Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
    Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.



  25. Butcher's Dog
    January 12, 2012 11:56 am

    Anyone else thinking Tina Fey is still stinging from the Ginny/Sherlock Holmes equation? Yeah, I thought so.



  26. LaReina
    January 12, 2012 3:25 pm

    Silly me, I must be hopelessly color-blind (no, this is not about mismatched socks or shoes): I can’t say I’ve ever made note of the ethnic background of the person who waited on me or made my sandwich at Panera’s.



  27. Virginia
    January 12, 2012 8:39 pm

    Tina/Marcia/Sha,

    Do you even know me?! TWILIGHT?! I saw five minutes of that movie on TV a few months ago and it was the part where he shows her how he sparkles in the sunlight and I never laughed so hard at a movie in all my life.



  28. Ginny's Dad
    January 12, 2012 11:37 pm

    Just a bit of clarification (sorry I’m late reading this post).

    I actually worked 40 years for U.S. Steel and retired in 2008. I was ordained as a minister in 1986. I was called a local elder then and assist the senior Pastor. I am a non-salaried minister. My official title is Associate Pastor.

    I don’t feel quite as old after reading that some of you young folks have also had some similar ” “shoe disparities”.

    @ KGC – I got a chuckle about the tied shoes because I often leave the house with my shoes knowingly untied. I calculated that I can save 6.8 seconds by tying my shoes later while stopped at a red light. It drives my wife crazy.



  29. Carol
    January 13, 2012 7:37 am

    proof positive that Troy is smarter than your average FBP. Brave too!

    the Haiku reminds me of my family dinners. Can’t get through a meal without the mention of poop.