“Do you want to see the 47 pictures I took of a pen?” is the new “Do you want to know how long it took me to run 3.5 miles today and how I felt about running those miles?”
You know how when people start worshiping at the Church of Long Distance Running that’s suddenly all they talk about or tweet about or write about? Regularly posting about how long they ran, their distance, what their route was, and how their knees took the run? Making you feel like a sack of out-of-shape shit because your lungs burst into flames that shoot out of your ears and gums halfway through a casual jog from your house to your mailbox?
That same thing happens to people when they get their first DSLR camera. They start talking about cameras and weird things like shutter speed and apertures and they make plans with their friends to go “shoot” and they start pinning pictures of lenses they’re lusting after on Pinterest like the rest of us pin pictures of John Malkovich. What? That man still rings my bell. I can’t help it. Ringalingaling.
Where were we? Right. I got a DSLR camera. Nothing new. A nice used Nikon D60 my husband found on eBay for me and so last night I asked him, “Do you want to see the 47 pictures I took of a pen?” and he looked at me like I said “Do you want to see the 47 pictures I took of a pen?” Batshit.
Here are some pictures I took of my pen. If these intrigue you and whet your appetite for pictures of pens or if you’re into pen porn (hiya, weirdos on Google searching for “pen porn”), I’ll be happy to put all 47 pictures on Flickr so you can see the 47 pictures I took of this pen. My favorite pen. The pen that Burgher Victor Kahn, who runs Happy to be Here, presents to people putting smiles on others’ faces. The pen handmade using different woods. The pen you can’t buy, but have to earn.
The pen I took 47 pictures of.
Also, immediately after this, I took 14 pictures of some numbers I scribbled on printouts I was using to research my next column at Pittsburgh Magazine.
I plan to sell prints on Etsy.
You’re just jelly ’cause my aperture punches your aperture right in the nose.