It’s all so clear now

Internet, look at this man:

Now, just by looking at that photo, take a guess as to what he is:

A. Serial killer

B. Amish farmer who viciously chops off others beards while they sleep

C.  Mad scientist

If you guessed C, like me, then you might be right!

“I told them I was mad scientist Jerry Wingrove and that’s who I am,” he told KDKA-TV.

I believe him. That guy has Heinz Doofenschmirtz written all over him.

“No – I didn’t go and hurt nobody,” he said. “I healed them. You know, you heal them, of course the sickness is going to come back from all the earth and planets, from the aliens and everything.”

This is so true, because every time I start to feel better, the aliens come and infect me again.

Now, my theory is that this mad scientist is the arch nemesis of Pittsburgh’s Batman, while the Rogue Tree Pruner, the Sharply Dressed Penny Thief, the One-Legged Wheelchair Bandit, the Eggnog Thief, the Soft-Spoken Robber, and the Toothless Woman are his henchpersons. I’m expecting an epic battle. This also explains why Christian Bale came back to town. Evil rang.

Now, the next question in the quiz. Where does this mad scientist reside?

A. Fayette County

B. Fayette County

C. Fayette County

You’ll never guess in a million years.





16 Comments

  1. Marisa
    April 11, 2012 2:48 pm

    I’d like to tell you that the majority of Fayette County isn’t like this, but… In our defense, Greene County and West Virginia constitute our borders and we sometimes get immigrants.



    • Autumn
      April 11, 2012 2:54 pm

      I say, whenever possbile, blame it on WV! =)



    • suzie-Q
      April 11, 2012 7:28 pm

      Yeah…blame it on Greene County…. you “Fayette-nam” you!!!
      Actually I must admit that once upon a time, Greene County was part of West Virginia….even they did not want us!!!!



  2. Pensgirl
    April 11, 2012 2:55 pm

    Huh…I was gonna say Mark Madden.



  3. Magus Patris
    April 11, 2012 3:37 pm

    He will use his healing Yinz-inator to rule the entire Tri-State Area!



  4. Aileen
    April 11, 2012 3:52 pm

    Actually, I looked quick and I thought it was Scott Hartnell of the Flyers.



  5. Elle C.
    April 11, 2012 8:22 pm

    lol love the Phineas and Ferb reference



  6. Leenyburgh
    April 11, 2012 8:46 pm

    Wow… He’s my age. I feel like an old crazy woman now.



  7. Bridget W.
    April 11, 2012 8:54 pm

    He spoke “exclusively to KDKA” ..wow…”them’s” some bragging rights!!!



  8. empirechick
    April 11, 2012 11:22 pm

    I thought it was a current picture of the ‘Revenge of the Nerds’ character Booger.



  9. Dr Kevlar
    April 12, 2012 6:47 am

    While an amusing story, one wonders what is going on in local newsrooms. I mean really, nothing better to do than to send Miss Hello Kitty all the way to Uniontown to report on this? And what is with her, anyway? Just based on body language and the emphasis she was putting on her script, one would think that a reincarnation of John Wayne Gacy, The Boogie Man, Jack the Ripper and Scott Hartnell was roaming Uniontown.

    Local News reporting has devolved to a level of suckitude that is almost unbelievable. Like there is nothing else going on that we SHOULD be hearing more about…

    Loved the neighbor, by the way. Anyone who does not meet his daffynition of “normal” should be carted away. Sounds like the perfect story for Marty Griffin.



    • bucdaddy
      April 12, 2012 11:30 am

      It’s what you get when you have maybe 10 minutes of actual news all day on a good day (counting the weather and the hockey highlights) and, what, four or five hours of air time to fill?



  10. ProudDemblogger
    April 12, 2012 10:52 am

    I have heard tales of someone in Westmoreland County equally as ridiculous: apparently this person considers herself a writer.and.a.business owner.



  11. bucdaddy
    April 13, 2012 10:35 am

    Charlie Manson can’t make parole but THIS guy is allowed to run free?



  12. Marisa
    April 17, 2012 6:38 am

    Guess who I saw walking the streets of Uniontown yesterday?!?

    If it’s possible, this guy looks even crazier in real life. This “celebrity sighting” is all thanks to That’s Church.