Winner of the Dunkin’ Mug!

Except I got TWO Dunkin’ mugs, so that means two winners!

This was a hard choice. I mean, getting loudly yelled at that you have huge wedgie is bad. Saying “blew himself … um’ … to death” live on the radio is hilariously bad. Saying the word “retarded” into a microphone at a Special Olympics event is beyond painful. Ripping your cousin’s bathroom mirror off of her wall is horrifying. Passing out and puking in random bowls of noodles in the middle of Australia is horrifically awesome. Maternity underpants. GIANT MATERNITY UNDERPANTS. [shudder]

So I took your advice and I picked the winners to be, in no particular order …

The Special Olympics Horror Story by Pittsburgh Pita

The Day I Destroyed My Cousin’s Bathroom by “Margaret”

Now I know lots of you didn’t share your stories or have other stories to tell (I know I do. I have one from college.), so we’re going to have this contest again soon and I’ll find a kickass prize for it, because I think when we all realize what giant dorks we are, it makes us a stronger family.

Winners, email me at virginia [at] thatschurch [dot] com with your mailing address and I’ll put your mug in the mail! “Margaret,” your identity will remain a secret with me, but if your real name is Bruce Banner, it’s going to make so much sense.

P.S. Random Bowls of Noodles would be a fantastic band name.


  1. Jim W.
    September 12, 2012 4:24 pm

    I wish more people would have embarrassed themselves.

  2. Emme Kay
    September 12, 2012 6:13 pm


    Amongst all the great embarrassing stories, watching the 46 kids get their stars, and bucdaddy’s Mike Tomlin story, this blog has been an amazing pick-me-up the past week or so. Thanks, yinz.

  3. bucdaddy
    September 13, 2012 1:09 am

    Random Bowls of Noodles?

    I’ve eaten there. It’s right across the Square from Las Velas.

  4. Jagoff
    September 13, 2012 7:41 am

    Good choice. Pittsburgh Pita’s story literally had me laughing out loud.
    So, got a new story from this Friday. Had to fly down to Florida for a job interview, so I was all suited up going through airport security. Going through security I was standing around waiting for my carry-on to come through the scanner. TSA agent goes “Excuse me sir, are you from around here?” “Yes, ma’am” “Are you familiar with the phrase ‘Kennywood’s open’?” *reach down to my zipper* “Aww shit!”

    • KGC
      September 13, 2012 5:48 pm

      I can’t tell you how many times I’ve noticed my zipper open over the past few months. I’m going to attribute it to the fact I’ve worn shorts most every day this Summer (working from home)… not that I’m approaching Senior Citizen status.

  5. TK
    September 13, 2012 3:20 pm

    Is there an age cut-off for an embarrasing moment (i.e. nothing from when you were younger than…)