That's Church

The winner of the Jim Krenn tickets is Mark at comment #8 who is a fan of Chris Rock.

He has been contacted to claim his prize.

If you didn’t win, you can get tickets by calling 412-456-6666 or visiting JimKrenn.com or by visiting the Cultural Trust here.  The $52.50 level tickets are sold out, but you can still get the $32.50 or $37.50 level. Also, a portion of proceeds will go to benefit Animal Friends.

So many posts today! But the good stuff keeps rolling in.

A bar in Philly called Nodding Hill is serving a beer called Crosby Tears:

CROSBY TEARS – $6.50 : STRONG ALE (8.7%ABV)… WHINE-LIKE IN “HONOR” OF ITS NAMESAKE… ORANGE HUED LIKE THE TEAM THAT SENT HIM HOME FOR THE SUMMER… THE PERFECT COMPLEMENT TO A PLAYOFF RUN

I can’t even retort that, it’s so genius. I wish a local bar had thought to have a Brady Tears beer. I’d be drunk ALL THE TIME IN EVERY WAY FOR EVER AFTER AMEN.

But, yeah, my hate grows. My kingdom to the person who brings me any Flyer’s balls on a stick.

(h/t Julie C-K)

Before this made its way to Gawker, Mikey and Big Bob tweeted it. A look at the cover of the Lifestyle section of the Tribune Review today.

Do they mean “shit yourself laughing?” Because I’m getting pretty close. It’s not even an optical illusion where if you look at it one way it’s a vase and another way, it’s two faces in profile. No. That very clearly says “Shit yourself.”

Oh, Trib. Hugs. Tomorrow’s a new day, with no mistakes in it, Anne Shirley.

(h/t Paul)

1. I never go to the symphony, but classical music always gives me goosebumps and I wonder why I don’t go to the symphony? My brother-in-law Muchacho, who Tina Fey refers to as the Sports Idiot Savant, is a classical music fan, so in his car he’s either listening to The Fan, or Beethoven. So he’ll appreciate this. Go check out a new post over at Pittsburgh Magazine featuring the four finalists in the PSO’s online soloist hunt.

I’m not revealing my favorite until Manfred Honeck chooses the winner, but who is yours?

Also, as indicated in the post, is it weird that I can still play the Star Wars theme on a recorder? Something I learned in THIRD GRADE?

2. Hockey season is over. This is probably old, but it’s new to me. And it is magnificent.

I literally cannot stop watching it. Somebody needs to pay me to watch it because I’m so good at it.

Also, raise your hand if you just said something in your head about Kris Letang and poking and “mmmrowr.”

You dirty.

(h/t @djlunchbox)

3. If you’re a pet lover, you will love this event. $35 gets you a 10-minute portrait session with photographer Nicole Begley at West Park in the North Side. The event is June 9, all day, and it benefits the Western Pennsylvania Humane Society. 

Somebody bring a baby hedgehog to the shoot and then send me the pictures please! I need more baby hedgehogs in my life.

See?

I’ve named him Schmoopsie and he is my bunnybumpkin.

Did you just die from cute?

4. Let’s take a vote. Who is the scumiest scum of the earth?

Anyone who would tamper with a school bus to the point that the wheels fall off and endanger the lives of dozens and dozens of innocent children?

Anyone who would vandalize a park dedicated to an officer of the law who was gunned down in cold blood while serving in the line of duty?

Ah, screw it. They both can win!

Assholes like that should receive in the mail every single day a postcard with Mister Rogers’ face on it and the words, “That wasn’t very neighborly of you.”

5. Speaking of Mister Rogers, I’m super excited for this. 

I’m also hopeful to have an interview up soon with the director of Mister Rogers & Me.  Like Roberto Clemente, if all you know about Mister Rogers is the very basics, I cannot encourage you enough to dig a little deeper into his life. It is an amazing, uplifting, affirming story in every single way.

Those men are better than self-united husbands. They’re my heroes.

6. Market Square has $5 valet parking now! And no, it’s not just for patrons of Market Square. It’s simply an effort to bring more people into downtown to spend money. Every day starting at 5 p.m., you can leave your car at the valet in Market Square until midnight for $5. No dealing with garages or lots or meters.  Give it a try, says this Market Square business owner with a vested interest!

7.  If you’re not one of the ten million viewers to the new Dark Knight Rises trailer that was posted just five days ago, here you go!

I’m excited! To see the mayor fall into a pit of doom! Just kidding, Lukey.

8. My new addiction. The Pittsburgh History Journal!

9. Pittsburgh was the only city to gain private sector jobs over the last four years of 16 cities that were in this benchmark study.

(h/t Popcity for the link and Angry Mongo for the graphic)

10. Remember Pedro Alvarez? He of the .064 batting average? He who I kept saying to, “Just swing, Pedro!” He who I prayed Roberto would lead down the path to awesomeness?

In just the last six games, he is batting .478 with eight RBIs!

But unfortunately, like the Cheese Touch, you can’t seem to get rid of Pirate Suck; you can only pass it on to someone else and Pedro passed it on to A.J. Burnett who went from a 1.38 ERA to a 8.34 in ONE GAME.

I just can’t stand it.

I haven’t written anything about the Pitt bomb threats since my lone post a few weeks back, and I’m pretty sure you heard me roll my eyes when the wittily named “The Threateners” said they would stop the threats if the $50,000 reward was pulled. I mean, The Threateners?! That’s the best these morons could come up with?

Let me help you:

The Scourge.

Malice Mongers.

Tribulation of Fire.

Cosmic Chaos.

Wait. That’s a Kennywood ride. Anyway, the fact that the group or individual that was making bomb threats decided to call themselves “The Threateners” confirmed my suspicions that there is lint between my toes with more smarts than they have.

And if you thought I rolled my eyes to the point of no return over The Threateners demanding the reward be rescinded, then surely you felt the reverberations as I slammed my head against the wall over and over again when a group claiming to be with the widely known Anonymous said they hacked into Pitt’s servers and accessed a whole host of private information on students. Things like social security numbers and birth dates and credit card numbers and addresses and more.

I used to kind of enjoy Anonymous’ hijinks and shenanigans, but if this is indeed Anonymous’ doing, they completely lost me when they revealed their demands of Pitt.

The video claims students who had complained to the school’s administration tipped off Anonymous to the vulnerabilities.  

Anonymous said it has deleted the data from the University’s server to prevent other hackers from getting the information.  It has called on the university to make the needed security changes, inform those whose information has been compromised and post an apology on its main page for at least 15 days.  The video says if the demands are not met the group will release the data on its own.

You see? They are angry that Pitt is risking student information which could harm the students if that information was hacked into. Therefore, they claim they stole that information and if Pitt doesn’t apologize to those students who Anonymous wants to protect, then Anonymous will hurt the students by releasing the info.

[blink]

That’s like being a cat lover, so you steal your neighbor’s cat which you are sure is at risk living in filth, and then you call your neighbor and you say, “I have your cat. You better apologize to Mister Fancypants Magee for your poor treatment of him, or I will cut his legs off one by one.”

Dumbest thing you ever heard, right?

Maybe Anonymous and The Threateners can get together to kidnap a kid, then demand ransom, and then say they will hurt the kid if their demands for ransom ARE met.

Not even Horatio Caine would see that one coming, but he would be all, “Somewhere, a nation of doofi …”

“… are missing their king.”